Dexter Recap: T-305 (Made in Kiev)

To relieve herself, Deb has a fuck fest in the elevator on the way down.  A verbal one.  Mind out of the gutters, readers.

Dexter is running the blood and finds out that it belongs to Louis. He gets over it when he sees Deb hovering over him.  Deb tells him that LaGuerta found the blood slide.

“That’s not good.”  No shit, Dexter.

He blames misplacing the slide on it not being his usual routine.  He likes to light a few candles to set the mood, monologue for a couple minutes, do a crazy dance, pick a weapon of choice and then not have his sister walk in.  Deb is offended that he’s suggesting it’s her fault.  She’s going to keep tabs on LaGuerta by helping her out but Dexter wants her out of it completely.  He’ll take care of it.

“LaGuerta has probably killed a few children, right?”

Deb’s not listening and pulls out a list of possible BHB victims.  She wants to head off the families of Dexter’s chosen few when she splits up the list with LaGuerta.  He points out 3 on a list of 15 people so maybe he’s not as busy as he says.  Then again, 3?  Doakes was killed in Season 2.  Cast a wider net, LaGuerta.  

Only one has family in Miami so she asks Dexter how it went down.  He’s a wedding photographer and would pick out girls and took pictures of what he did to them.  Spoiler alert: they didn’t catch the bouquet.  Dexter grabbed the guy at a reception and Deb can’t believe him.  He could’ve been in the pictures or recognized.

“I’m not a young woman or Eddie Izzard.  We should be good.”

Dexter has to worry about Louis first so he goes home.  He notices his curtains are open and with Jaime off galavanting (living with a grandmother as a child rubs off on you) and Harrison being Harrison he knows someone has been here.  We get a shot of Isaak sitting inside with a set of household tools and a gun.  If he was a serial killer, the media would probably call him “The Repair Man”.

What’s your plan when the door opens? Shoot him, then torture his dead body?  It’s an apartment complex.  My neighbors complain when the sound level on my TV hits double digits.

Dexter has a Crank Yankers moment and calls his phone pretending to confirm a meeting with Dexter.  Isaak overhears the answering machine and leaves the place and Dexter recognizes him from the Fox Hole.  He assumes that Isaak is just a hitman.

Where’s my playstation?

Isaak shows up at Schooner or Later (very punny) where he expects Dexter to be meeting someone for lunch.  Dexter’s across the way and calls the restaurant for Isaak.  Isaak wants to know about Viktor’s death while Dexter plays dumb.  He confesses to killing Louis and that Louis had some last words calling Dexter a bag of the Summer’s Eve variety.  Isaak also says that this is personal because Viktor was a friend.  A buddy if you will.  He wants Dexter and anyone in Miami Metro who’s involved with Viktor’s death.  Dexter admits to working alone and tells him his issues begin and end with Dexter.  Kind of like that last sentence.

Dexter calls Deb for a Deep Throat meeting in the garage.  He’s keeping Deb in the loop on Isaak’s plans.  When she asks why Isaak is after Dexter, he confesses to murdering Viktor.  His excuse is that Viktor was leaving for Kiev and Batman only works in Gotham and can’t get the skyhook for run of the mill criminals.  Dexter wanted to take down Mike’s killer and also says that Alex was a patsy.  Deb wants to know how he can be so sure and he also tells her that he hid evidence.  She’s outraged because she can’t be the lieutenant of homicide if her cases are compromised.  But, come on, Deb.  We’ve all seen Miami Metro at work.

Deb wants to run off and arrest Isaak but Dexter can’t risk him talking.  Because Isaak thinks it’s a mass conspiracy within Miami Metro, Dexter needs to take them down while keeping at least him and his sister hidden.  He’s getting a hotel for them to hideout in.  Again, not how she pictured getting a hotel with him.  

She wants him to promise to never steal a case from homicide again. He agrees.  When she asks if he’s lying, his response is ” I don’t think so”.

“Did it grow?”

He’s off to follow Isaak to find out he’s the boss.  He wants to continue but Angel calls him in because Hannah is going to go through the evidence with them.  Rain check for Isaak.

When Dexter gets into the office, he basically takes notes as Hannah points to objects on a table.  Good thing Dexter was available because it’s not like anyone can do that.

They go through her stories, the time they ran over a poodle and burned it in effigy for that funny looking homeless guy they killed, that time they went to a gas station and all the cans were exploding, the time when they went surfing and found an eyepatch.  Good times.

When they got to Miami, there was a cruise leaving soon.  They killed some people to take their spots on the cruise.  They were caught before escaping however.

Dodged a bullet there.

The remaining bodies should be by the port.  She starts to talk about how every time she dug a grave she thought it was her own.  Judging by Angel’s tone, he could give zero fucks and is going to get the ball rolling on the digs.

When Angel leaves, she starts to play with the giraffe toy in evidence.

Makes me feel almost nostalgic.

Dexter goes to the motel he’s staying at with Deb.  He’s searching on the internet and finds out that the Koshka brotherhood is at odds with the Colombians and he can use that to his advantage.  Unfortunately, he still has a pissed off sister to live with.  He kicks her out of one bed saying he needs to be closest to the door.  Also, he is forming a plan to get them out of this but won’t tell Deb.

They start to talk about old trips and reminisce.  Dexter was always her hero, the way he kept his eyes on her all day.  May explain that serial killer fetish.

The next day, Dexter and Angel are at the dig.  Angel runs his theory about Alex by Dexter.  Dexter says the evidence supports that it was a suicide.  Angel doesn’t like what he’s hearing so he walks off.  Which allows for Ms. McKay to get in on Dexter.  He likes blondes so she has a shot.

They discuss the first murder scene they both saw.  Hannah feigns disgust while Dexter was more concerned about the wasted sandwich at the scene.  She compares it to swapping sex stories on a date.

Right, like our first sexual experience.

LaGuerta finds Deb going to the wedding photographer’s house and offers to join.  When they knock, only the son is home but he offers to help.  The day his dad disappeared was the greatest day in his life, you see.  His father used to beat him and his mom but it all changed after he was gone and their lives are better now. 

You wanna know how I got these scars?

The son gets some photos from his father’s last gig.  You would think a) Dexter would’ve destroyed the camera when he picked him up after the reception, b) the family who got married may have their wedding pictures, c) the wife of an abusive husband wouldn’t likely keep work photos of her husband.  Who got these photos printed?

Well, LaGuerta, on Lundy’s hunch, expects to find someone in law enforcement in these pictures.  Sure enough as they go through them, Deb sees Dexter’s goofy face.

Ah, there’s probably not even film in that camera.

Deb offers to go over the photos more thoroughly back at the office.  LaGuerta agrees this shouldn’t be rushed.

They find the bodies back at the dig and Dexter goes through the kill procedure with amazing detail.  He notices most importantly that Hannah was lying.  He covers for her by cutting his description short and saying he needs to run more tests.  I guess that nose is growing.

Hannah confronts him and Dexter admits that he covered for her.  She plays dumb blonde.  He drops some science on her but she’s keeping to her story.  She won the individual immunity challenge before agreeing to find the bodies so it doesn’t matter what happens.

She’s not this stupid.

Dexter finds Isaak is following him so he leads him to a Colombian bar.  Dexter exits out the back but not before warning the Colombians that Koshka’s are coming.  Dexter hears gunfire before driving away, happy that he may satisfy his sister for once.  

Meanwhile, Deb is going through the photos when Angel wants to talk Alex the Bartender.  He gets cut off by a call from dispatch who have found out about Dexter’s little scheme.  Dexter walks in as they have to leave to the crime scene.  I hope gas prices are reasonable in Miami because he’s doing a lot of back and forth.

They show up and Dexter’s smile gets turned upside down when he notices a bunch of bodies and none belong to a sharply dressed Ukrainian.  When Quinn throws out it could be the Koshka’s, Deb shits kittens and locks eyes with Dexter.  Good thing, there aren’t any detectives in the room.  

Dexter goes through the kills of the three men in the bar.  Apparently, Isaak stood in the middle and shot down one guy, took a grazed shotgun shot off the head before killing the shooter, blocked a knife slice and hit him over the head with a nearby bottle and walked out.  He’s the new Terminator T-305 model specifically for Miami.  Only problem is this model bleeds.  So they can pin the crime on him and issue an arrest.

Quinn shows up at the Fox Hole with Nadia.  She wants to repay him for giving her a ride.  I was told there was no sex in the champagne room.  Liars.

Isaak is getting stitched up at the bar and is adamant that he will take care of this himself.  I guess they don’t have CSI in the Ukraine because his blood is at the scene.  He doesn’t have Stringer Bell’s lawyer.

That’s when Mr. Manager notices Quinn is at the club.  They decide to give Quinn a bag of cash in case he saw anything.  When Quinn finds it in his car, he just keeps it.  What?  Never heard of the phrase found money.

They arrest Isaak after the blood matches.  He seems unaffected by it.  I guess in Soviet Russia, jail breaks out you.

Angel comes back to discuss Alex’s suicide.  Deb has to cover her ass though and channels LaGuerta’s bitchiness to yell at Angel.  She’s not going to turn cases from black to red and it’s at the expense with her relationship with Angel.  Looks like that ringworm is doing some eating right about now.

Dexter goes to have a chat with Isaak.  Isaak wants Dexter dead.  He liked Viktor.  He may even like like Viktor.  So even though he’s behind bars, there are still people out there who will do Isaak’s bidding.  Isaak tells this through story time but it’s a little late for Reading Rainbow.  Dexter will just have to watch his back.

Deb comes over later that night to show Dexter the picture.  He hates to do it, but he admits that she saved him.  Deb wants out of his going-ons.  She knows that he can’t stop, won’t stop, uh-uh, uh-uh.  But she’s out and LaGuerta’s investigation is still on.  So he’s got to just escape her grasp.  We end with one more lie from Dexter.  That nothing came of the dig.

What you guys think?  Will Isaak return? Is Hannah the main theme for the second half or Dexter’s new main squeeze?  What will come of Quinn’s bribe?  Comment below.  Again, sorry for the delay.

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