Moving on to Lineysha’s actual scene and can we take a moment to appreciate that Jessica Wild had a big, gold purse with her:
Still the cutest boy ever on this show, and by all accounts a really sweet person, LINEYSHA. Anyway, on to season 5. Vivienne is going a little too “real” with her Tati-peeve, but Lineysha’s nailing Tyra’s narcissistic, slow-talking, hangdog vibe. Even Ivy has to admit in interview that while she was kind of a nightmare to work with, she was on point and might be a force to be reckoned with.
Finally, Team Detox. They start off with the Phi Phi/Sharon fight about Sharon not deserving to be there because all she wanted was a cruise. I love how Phi Phi was the arbiter of who should and shouldn’t be there based upon the Phi Phi scale of entitlement. God, I still can’t stand her. Alaska admits that she told Sharon she wanted a cruise, but she really wanted the money and HAHAHA, they got both! Wah, waaaah Phi Phi. Detox and her mighty ass (seriously, it’s kind of amazing) is nailing Sharon’s dead pan way of talking but Alaska’s at a bit of a loss because Phi Phi talked fast and made no sense, but luckily for her, Phi Phi also flailed a lot so she’s just hiding behind that.
Coco interviews that, OF COURSE, she got to be LaShauwn with her janky makeup. Not that Coco’s is ever janky, hers is usually flawless. And Monica is Jiggly…after the weight loss. Monica’s a little off and low energy so Detox tells her to just go crazy with it. Instead she starts speaking the lines which throws Coco off. But this team is so functional that Monica gets that she’s not performing as well as she could and we move on.
Runway Day! Alaska duhs in interview that it’s always tense because everyone’s nervous about getting the boot while Shady Jade whines about not wanting to be on the bottom. Ugh, I know she’s got her fans and I can’t stand Serena either, but you’d think someone who looks like a naked mole rat in a Ken Paves hairpiece out of drag wouldn’t be quite so diva-ish. Just because she’s better than Serena doesn’t mean she’s good.
Monica’s quietly putting on her makeup when Coco notices that something’s not right with her and comes over to talk. While Monica tries, and fails, to keep it together she interview that she doesn’t feel right and wants to leave because it’s getting too hard to keep her secret and this is getting way deeper than a silly little show mocking ANTM should. Coco sits with Monica and gives her the “Buck up, little camper,” speech but admits in interview that Monica’s not really there.
SHOWTIME! Ru’s a mid-century vision in sparkly black and white and greets this week’s judges: Michelle Visage, who is now scripted and apropos of nothing says this is the best group of queens EVA! Santino, who has nothing of value to say, Kristen Johnston who is (un)surprisingly attracted to Ru, and the crazy lady from Encino – Juliette Lewis and her totally natural-looking red wig.
Pages: 1 2 3 4 5
6 7 8 9 10 11 12