Alaska’s combing out her giant Bunny wig when Ru comes over. They’re both old vaudevillians at heart so they make corny old Alaska jokes until Alaska wins by joking that she’s “a continent…she’s INcontinent.” Heh. Alaska tells Ru she’s doing Bunny and Ru gets both excited and agitated as he tells Alaska that Bunny’s probably THE funniest person he knows…then puts the fear of god in Alaska by saying he wants her to be funnier than Bunny. By-eee.
Coco Montrese. Ru looks at all the studs, black leather and spandex and jokes that she’s doing Margaret Thatcher. HA, like Coco knows who that is. No, she’s doing Janet because she does Janet “six nights a week in Vegas.” Coco tries to sell it that she knows Janet inside and out but Ru don’t care. He just reminds Coco to bring the funny.
Ru’s actually at a loss over who Detox is doing because all he sees is a spray-painted and ratty blonde wig. Is it Rachel Zoe after a fire? HAHAHAHA but no, it’s Detox’s “friend” Ke$ha. Ru stops Detox dead in her tracks and asks if knowing Ke$ha will make her pull some punches. Detox says she doesn’t want to slander her…too much but Ru thinks that’s going to be a problem since the point is to be FUNNY.
Wait, why is this the first I’m hearing that I’m supposed to be funny?
With Detox good and confused Ru moves on to Jinkx. She has half her makeup on and is slightly embarrassed. Ru thinks she’s quite a character and is dying to know who she’s performing: Little Edie Bouvier Beale. Ru, of course, knows and loves Little Edie but wonders if the home audience might be put off and was that a concern. Jinkx says it was and she considered doing a pop icon but none of them “spoke” to her like Little Edie. She really relates to Edie, especially as the competition has gone on because she feels “a little misunderstood” like Edie. Ru hears Jinkx but reminds her to make Edie pop “for the unwashed masses.”
From the sublime to the ridiculous, Ru moves on to Lineysha who wants to do…Michelle Obama. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Wait, no…HAHAHAHAHAHA. Ru is speechless but soldiers on, asking why her. Because Lineysha thinks she can look like Michelle Obama. Ru cuts that one off at the pass, reminding Lineysha it’s not about the look it’s about being FUNNY, then wants to hear some of Lineysha’s impersonation. Ru asks what “Michelle” served the President for breakfast and Lineysha responds…French fries. Oh, dear. Ru asks another question about the Obama girls but the weed’s finally gotten to Lineysha’s brain and she stands there smiling and slack-jawed.
Pass the dutchie on the left-hand side.
Ru’s not going away without at least trying to steer Lineysha in the right direction and asks if there’s anyone, ANYONE at all she can do besides Michelle Obama. Quite surprisingly she pulls the name Celia Cruz out of her ass and while, yes, she was the Queen of Salsa, she’s also been dead for 10 years. Lineysha’s a riddle wrapped in an enigma and smothered in weed smoke. Ru thinks that’s a better idea because, Cuban, but Lineysha wants to stick with Michelle Obama because that’s what she’s been working on. Yes. Stay the wrong course because you’re already there. That’s the laziness that made America, and its territories, great.
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