Tonight’s lip synch is “I’m So Excited.” (Although even with its slow, crunchy beats I’d have rather “Yes We Can Can”– RIP, June. And Ruth Pointer doesn’t get nearly enough props for her own awesome voice.) Coco spews some “heartfelt” words about having to bring it while Jade says she’s just going out there and spinning and giving a high energy performance. I knew Coco would do well because it seems to be the only thing Coco can do well but I was genuinely surprised at how much I liked Jade’s performance. Hell, even the judges were having a great time. I thought they looked even but what did Ru think?
Livelier than Honey and Vivi…zzzz even in a still.
She quickly tells Coco to shantay and for a moment, when she didn’t tell Jade to sashay, I thought she might get to stay, too, but no. She sashays away. Anyway, Jade’s sad but grateful on the runway and thanks Ru for giving her the most amazing experience. Ru tells her to stay très Jolie and Jade walks off, telling us that she gave it her all and if she had to leave, she’s glad she lost to a good friend. Sure. Make me like you the episode you leave. Just stop calling not fat people fat. It makes you seem mean.
Shine on, Rainbow Brite.
But what happened behind the scenes on Untucked?
Jade continues down the endearingly self aware path, accepting that she’s probably going to lip synch and should have just had fun with it, especially after Alyssa, with her own awful voice, didn’t get intimidated at all. Detox aims for a compliment, telling Jade she doesn’t need to be insecure because she has a great voice then totally misses the mark by saying it’s very “Taylor Swift.” A for effort, Detox. Jade defends her outfit but promises to lip synch for her motherfucking life, and actually meant it. Detox tries one more time to put Jade at ease by adding in “…and Alyssa’s fat,” which, heh.
Alyssa starts off laughing right along with everyone, joking that Detox is “instigating” but when the rest of the queens join in, even Ivy and Jinkx are having some fun with it, and pile on she stops laughing. She foreshadows in interview that it brought up bad memories of her verbally abusive father.
HAHAHAHA, wait why am I laughing?
Jade keeps talking, trying to make herself okay with lip synching, prompting Coco to cart out her victim bag of tricks and moan that she knows she’s in the bottom, but can we talk about how Alyssa sold her out on the runway? Dramatic chord tells us we’re going to see a flashback. Seems Alyssa made the grave mistake of answering Ru’s question of “How was it to work together?” by admitting what EVERYONE saw the whole time. That Coco, once again, was pouting, acting like a child and phoning in a shitty, angry performance. Only she said it way nicer than that.
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