Drag Race Recap: We Are the Queens, We Are the Children

Recaps

By vallegirl | Friday, March 8, 2013 | 8:44 am | 13 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Drag Race, Recaps

Jinkx admits to losing confidence in applying her makeup under normal conditions but, too late, Ru will be watching your every move through night vision goggles. Lights go out and while Ru watches on, telling us it’s all fun and games until the looting starts, the queens are understandably subdued what with all the waist high tables around the room, but Detox still manages to ask Coco how she’s going to blend “her powders,” and HAHA, Detox. Good one. You know it was good because Coco’s already added Detox to her shit list.

Alaska jokes in interview that in the light or dark, she’s certain Alyssa’s pulling her Carol Burnett faces and, sure enough, Alyssa’s sucking in those cheeks like she’s got to work ‘cause the rent’s due. Ru blandly tells the queens she’s watching them but Ru lies. She’s checking out the Pit Crew’s junk while they lollygag around waiting for the lights to come back on.

Hello, sailor!

Lights come up and the queens all take their places wearing giant funereal veils to reveal their handiwork. First up, Jinkx. It doesn’t look as awful as she thinks, despite looking like it was drawn on with crayons and magic markers. Detox is next and looks like Detox. I was going to joke that she had an unfair advantage since she just could use the contours of all that silicone in her face as a road map, but it’s not so funny now that I know it’s true. Alyssa’s isn’t bad since she focused mostly on her mouth, and is so enthralled by her reflection that Ru has to remind her it’s a challenge.

Max…the fans…

Next up is Ivy and points for trying to do her eyebrows but the overall effect is a little too Diane Ladd. Roxxxy’s next and is so SURE she’s going to get the same response Detox did until she sees the ragged mess she painted and says “No Ma’am.” But to be honest, her worst mistake was actually having that heinous shade of pink in her makeup kit. Gurr, orange girls should not wear bubblegum pink. They clash. To prove my point, pasty Jade is wearing almost the exact shade and yet it looks cute on her. Sure, Ru calls her “young boy first time in drag?” but still, young cute boy, not Oompa Loompa.

Coco’s next and she do love orange highlights with bright pink lips. Coco admits it’s bad like she’s hoping someone will say it isn’t, but Alyssa asks in interview, “Gurr, what was those colors?” Heh. Finally, Alaska. And rather than go for the win she goes for the laughs and just drew lips all over her cheek. She and Ru shriek but Ru jokes that it’s perfect.

So, of course Detox won, she had that road map. And with no segue we’re on to the main challenge. Ru tells the queens, except for Coco who remembers the mid 80s because she’s old, gurr, that back in the 80s supergroups like Band Aid and USA for Africa formed to record songs to raise money. And in that spirit, the queens will be writing their own inspirational anthem, “Can I Get an Amen.” The queens all say “Amen,” so Ru can say, no, that’s the name of the song…”Can I Get an Amen.”

She’s a joker, she’s a smoker, she’s a midnight toker.

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vallegirl
About

Vallegirl has never actually lived in a valley, has a lot of time on her hands and likes to yell at kids about how things were in her day.  Currently in LA, she's also spent a lot of time in the great states of  New York and Florida so she's not crazy, it's just a cultural thing.

13 Comments

  1. 1
    Gilty Plezzur
    Posted March 8, 2013 at 9:57 am

    Bye, bye, Jade. On to better things, like starring in the Jodi Arias story. She’d be perfect in that role.

  2. 2
    April
    Posted March 8, 2013 at 11:09 am

    Did anyone else notice Jinxx yawning on the runway? I thought I saw her do it and Michelle made a WTF face. I waited for her to call Jinxx out on it, but it never happened. I am sure it was because of her narcolepsy so it was not something she could help. So I would just overlook it as a judge. Wondered if I hallucinated it.

  3. 3
    michkabibbles
    Posted March 8, 2013 at 11:56 am

    @april-i noticed that, too, along with michelle’s reaction. my thought was that it was on purpose, because she was playing ‘rich bitch’, and it coincided with her saying she’s just so over it-something to that affect. but i did think michelle was going to call jinx out on it.

    after jinx, alyssa is my fave. at least she’s self aware and doesn’t pout, and i love her crazy face and expressions (both facial and verbal). i think she was willing to play this whole fued with coco thing for camp and laughs (like when she was teasing coco about her make-up), but coco is so far up her own butt, she takes everything so seriously. i hope she’s next to go.

  4. 4
    juddfan
    Posted March 8, 2013 at 1:59 pm

    Somehow this episode escaped my DVR, I’ll have to look for it on On Demand and come back to enjoy this on Monday!

    xoxoxo

  5. 5
    Miss Molly
    Posted March 8, 2013 at 3:08 pm

    @juddfan – my DVR didn’t tape it either. I had to watch it on LOGO online.

  6. 6
    April
    Posted March 8, 2013 at 3:57 pm

    I always watch them on logotv.com.

  7. 7
    Kylie
    Posted March 8, 2013 at 4:48 pm

    I knew Jade would get sent home soon, she just always coasted along in the middle. BUT her lipsync was one of the most surprising things I’ve seen on the show in a while. Girl was GOOD. I’m sure as a performer, she’ll do well. Plus, as much as I hated her attitude, she’s gorgeous.
    Coco is annoying the shit out of me, Alyssa (as much as she can annoy me to) was trying so hard to make things work and Coco was having none of it. Come onnnnnnn.

  8. 8
    chaosbutterfly
    Posted March 9, 2013 at 7:55 pm

    I didn’t like Jinkx’s runway at all. I get what she was going for, but her makeup was almost as bad as last week, the outfit and wig were not high-glamour, at least not the kind that Michelle is looking for, and I really didn’t like her yawning.
    I know why she did it, but still…it just wasn’t the right thing at the time.
    I wish she would make good friends with Ivy and get some makeup tips.
    Remember how tragic PhiPhi looked at the beginning of the season last year? By the end, she looked so much better all around, because she got help from Kenya Michaels with her makeup.

    My only irritation with Alaska is that I don’t see her trying enough. I think part of why she makes everything into a joke or just plain gives up is because she’s afraid to put everything into it and end up looking foolish (which is ridiculous because she’s a freaking drag queen), or failing. The only exception I can think of is the ballet challenge. And I guess she took a risk on the kid show challenge too, even though it didn’t pay off.
    But generally, she doesn’t put herself out there enough, especially in the mini-challenges. I know that they aren’t as important as elimination challenges, but they matter because they are still an opportunity to show Ru who you are and what you can do. She really should be less self-conscious and relax.

    I’m glad that Jade went home because she’s beautiful but lame. But I was also very pleasantly surprised by how good her lipsync was. Coco is an excellent lipsyncer and given her age, I think she just had a much better connection to it, so I didn’t expect Jade to actually stay, but it was far from the blowout that I expected.

  9. 9
    badgerfreak
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 6:48 am

    I would agree with Vallegirl that Rotox brings out the worst in each other. They are much better peopl when not paired off together. Or at least Detox is.

    Coco needs to go. As much as Jade had been coasting, I was honestly a little surprised she went home. This was Coco’s second time in the bottom, Jade’s first. And Coco has had some serious attitude issues, that she has been called out for on the runway, a couple of times. Unacceptable behavior. She’s gosta go soon!

    Every week, I love Jinkx more. She’s such a doll. I get the “glamor” that she’s trying to portray. She needs to understand that what Michelle is looking for, is MODERN glamor, not vintage. While I think her vintage glamor is beautiful, it’s not what the judges are asking of her.

  10. 10
    ConfusedinCanada
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 7:54 am

    I have to wonder if Alaska being on this show so soon after Sharon winning was a mistake. It seems that she is comparing herself to Sharon inside her own head. She might have done better on a later show.

    Jade is truly a beautiful queen and I hope she goes far in her career.

    Now I wasn’t a Jinx fan at the beginning but damn I love that girl.

  11. 11
    April
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 11:44 am

    Can’t wait for the new episode! I already saw the first 10 minute preview and Reading is FUNDAMENTAL dahlings!

    This could be Alaska’s challenge to win because she can be pretty funny.

  12. 12
    Sunny
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 1:51 pm

    “Reading is FUNDAMENTAL dahlings!”

    :D Yesssss!

  13. 13
    Sammi
    Posted March 12, 2013 at 1:58 pm

    Omg, Alyssa Edwards and Ivy Winters <3333
    Ivy's smile… I'm gonna die!

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