That hubris wave is cresting and they’re just so very high on themselves that Detox can’t even be assed to look at Ru who’s face is all “WTF?” Meanwhile, Coco and Alyssa duh that their lyrics don’t even make sense because if you can’t get a gig you can’t get a lace-front because they’re expensive. Heh.
Alaska sings her line about tucking her junk and getting out on that fucking runway and Ru’s seriously rethinking this cast and how they can’t even get the simplest directions right but emphasizes that they’ll be singing the G-rated version, right? RIGHT?????!??!?!!
Damn, gotta get a Plan B.
Ru calls the queens to tell them that the video will debut on the main stage and special guest judges will be three “amazing” women who appeared on the original “We Are the World,” Anita and Ruth Pointer (Do you think they know what their name means in drag culture?) and LaToya Jackson. Runway theme is “highlight your best body part,” and how many queens do you think will say “Screw that,” and just wear an ass-out dress? But whatever, just don’t fuck it up, okay?
Time to record the song and the lovely Lucian has his big boy shirt and tie on. But is still pinchably cute. He’s in a good mood when he tells the queens that they’re also recording a live video then teases Coco that she’s under some pressure to start things off.
Straight away Coco’s being pissy with Lucian, “thanking” Detox in the most high-pitched, clipped voice that’s just begging for a fight. Detox is ignoring her so Lucian’s asks if anything’s wrong. “NO, nothing!,” Poor Lucian’s already cycled through his first 15 WTF? faces and they haven’t even started yet. Detox jumps in all “What? Huh?” so Alyssa grits that they’re ready.
Coco tells us in interview what she should have said before they recorded, that she’s pissed and nervous about going first, but instead she reedily warbles a line about losing all hope today. While she punches her thigh, Lucian jokes that she really lost all hope there because Lucian can’t read body language very well. Coco’s not getting anything, even how to hold the head phones, so Lucian has to remind her to move them to her other hand so we can “see her beautiful face,”
She’s a PRO-FES-SION-AL!
Indeed. Alyssa sucks but we all knew that, including Alyssa, so she’s just trying to ham it up and save what she can so she doesn’t have to lip synch. Coco, on the other hand, is still fuming and stomping and begging people to ask her what’s wrong so she can pinch out a clipped ‘NOTHING.” Man, she’s awful. Moving on to Jinkx, Ivy and Jade.
Jade starts them off and she’s terrified. Her voice is tiny and she’s staring at the floor so Lucian has to ask her why. Clearly the power of his adorableness is strong because she gets all flustered and girly. Heh. Moving on to Ivy. She’s great and Lucian has a bona fide, honest to god, happy smile because this is the first time in three seasons that he hasn’t had to cringe and lie and coax something out of the hopeless queens. He claps and tells her she did a great job and, like Jade, she gets completely flustered and giggly because the cute boy LIKES HER!!!!
He likes me…he really likes ME!
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