Drag U Recap: Back in the Saddle

Meanwhile, Faith and Latrice bond over what a big old manly man Michael Jordan is and how he’d be both their ideal husbands…but Faith says “He’s taken.” She just keeps getting cuter. Then she tells Latrice about how when she first got married she’d still go on auditions but her husband got insecure so she stopped and settled into being a wife and mother except he skipped out and now she’s raising her boys alone. Latrice goes into Mama Bear mode telling her she’s a strong, beautiful woman, then springs her frumpy picture on her. Way harsh, Latrice. To Faith’s credit, it could be worse. It’s just shapeless, butch and non-descript, or as Latrice says, “Looks like she’s going to the grocery store.” Faith understands what an insult that is and asks if it’s really that bad. Someone watches What Not to Wear.

Somewhere in NYC Stacy London started squawking like a parrot.

Shana’s explaining her situation to Manila and using a lot of euphemistically coded language about feeling ashamed that she allowed herself to go through the things she did. Manila clarifies, a little, that while Shana was in California looking for work her asshole husband was scouring a porn site for hookups. Manila is really sweet telling Shana her husband was a dick and to leave it in the past, then shows Shana her daytime drag, which was a gift from her mom, to which Manila says Shana’s mom is mean…and how dare she?

Manila has a point.

With the get to know a divorcee segment over, Ru comes in to introduce one of this season’s changes: Quick Drag. Ostensibly, it’s to help the women over the hump and teach them how much fun it is to play dress up, but it’s really just a filler segment where they race around the workroom for five minutes pulling clothes, shoes, and wigs to put together a…well, quick drag look, hence the name.

The queens are only supposed to offer guidance and we see how they interpret that. Jujubee tells Hilary what to grab, Latrice switches from Mama Bear to Mommie Dearest, again, and shakes her head judgmentally while Manila tells Shana that she should use her own free will to choose two specific pairs of shoes then tells her to hurry up over to the dresses before “Jujubee steals everything.” Heh. Then she tells Shana to change and promises not to look at her boobs but totally sneaks a peek because…BOOBS!

Even McDonaldland hookers like boobies.

Latrice gave in to letting Faith wear a blonde wig while Jujubee beats the crap out of Hilary’s to give it volume and Latrice throws some shade at Manila over who picked out Shana’s cute outfit. Hilary’s concerned about her rack because when you lose weight you lose your tits but Juju tells her lift them up and out. One last struggle with strappy sandals and it’s time to meet up with Ru at the Dragulator.

He really likes Hilary’s sparkly dress, wonders how being conservative has been working out for Faith (not too well), then thinks Shana’s trying to be Manila’s twin since they’re both wearing red wigs of a color not found in nature. But that was just prologue. It’s time for the students to get their drag personae assigned. First up, Hilary:

Juju’s in love but Hilary’s having difficulty seeing herself being so glamorous. Ru asks about the dramatic neckline and Hilary admits she’s a little squeamish because of the boob loss. Ru lets her know there are plenty of things to help her along which, duh…they’re men in dresses, they should know about creating a boob-lusion. Next up is Faith:

She’s a little dumbstruck at the new look but is happy and thinks that if she doesn’t watch out, she might get a date. Seriously, so cute with how earnestly she’s taking this.Finally, it’s Shana’s turn: