DTWS All-Stars Recap: Rock ‘n’ Roll Ain’t Here to Stay

Recaps

By PopePhilly | Thursday, October 18, 2012 | 6:00 am | 23 Comments
Posted in: Dancing w/ The Stars, Recaps

Scores:
Carrie Ann – 10
Len – 9.5
Paula – 10
Bruno – 10
39.5/40
Len just isn’t going to give up that 10!

Apolo and Karina are performing Hip Hop. While they’re getting some random massages, Karina admits that she hates Hip Hop. She really seems insecure. She’s cursing up a storm. Shut up, Karina! Just stop complaining. You’re starting to sound like Bristol! 

BELL BIV DEVOE!!! I’m such a 90s kid! Man, it really showed in that dance that Karina hates Hip Hop. First of all, she fell. Aside from that, the whole thing just looked uncomfortable. However, I will say that I didn’t realize Karina actually fell until she pointed it out. It almost looked like that move was on purpose because they were doing all types of drops. Apolo taking off his mic to the beat was pretty cool. 

Carrie Ann reassures Karina that she didn’t mess up the whole routine. She also likes the modern choreography to the old school song. Len just says, “Go, dawg!” Also, he wasn’t even looking at Karina. I wonder if Len’s wife knows. Paula knows that professionals are always hardest on themselves. Bruno calmly says that Apolo made the running man look good!

Scores:
Carrie Ann – 8.5
Len – 9
Paula – 8.5
Bruno – 8.5 (The excitement is gone)
34.5/40

Also, just for shits and giggles, here is a photo of Len in 1956 that I found:


He knew how to rock a turtle neck! 

Last but not least, Kelly and Vally are performing a Contemporary dance…in their underwear. They’ve both been acting weird and moody all night. I wonder if they’re trying to stay in character or they’re just being jerks. It was mentioned that Kelly broke her toe earlier that day, so she’s probably miserable. Val seems to just be acting like a 15-year-old emo kid. Also, that was some really awkward rehearsal footage. I wouldn’t be surprised if we just ended up watching Kelly and Val have sex on dance floor. 

And sex on the dance floor is pretty much exactly what happened. When they were actually dancing, they seemed a bit off. Maybe I just don’t understand Contemporary dance. Len thinks that Kelly is the biggest revelation of the season. Paula is proud of Kelly dancing through her injury. Bruno thinks it was beautiful. That’s the calmest he’s been all season. Carrie Ann is in tears and called the dance stunning.

Scores:
Carrie Ann – 9
Len – 9.5
Paula – 9.5
Bruno – 9.5
37.5/40

RESULTS!

Hooray! This episode is only an hour long because of the Presidential Debate! Yay, for politics!

The show starts with a woman dancing in the middle of one of those parachutes from elementary school gym class. 

Ballroom at its finest! 

Group one:
Shawn and Derek – SAFE!
Kelly and Val – SAFE!
Bristol and Mark – JEOPARDY!
Sabrina and Louis – SAFE!

CARSON IS HERE!!!! He gets to rub bronzer on Gilles. I’m so jealous!!!! Then The Legion of Extraordinary Dancers performs. There weren’t nearly the acrobatics that Tom promised. There were umbrellas. That was kind of cool, I guess.

Group two:
Gilles and Peta – SAFE!
Emmitt and Cheryl – SAFE!
Apolo and Karina – JEOPARDY!

Then there is a lot of fluff. Cheryl choreographs a dance with some people she’s known since she was a kid. That’s kind of cool. I didn’t really pay close attention. There’s still amaretto in my freezer. :)

OK, I have to say that I love the way that Kirstie looks at her score. She can tell people she got a 30. It doesn’t matter that it was out of 40. I say the same thing about the first time I won an award at States for public speaking. I came in 6th in rhetorical criticism. I just tell people that I was 6th in the entire state of Pennsylvania. They don’t have to know that only 9 people competed in that event that year! 

Group three:
Melissa and Tony – SAFE!
Kirstie and Maks – JEOPARDY! (No!!!! Kirstie needs to stay and make me laugh each week!) 

Donnie Osmond and Susan Boyle sing “This is the Moment.” That is the worst fucking version of that song I’ve ever heard. I have to be angry for a minute. “This is the Moment” is a very special song for me. I sang it when I auditioned for college (I started as a music major), I sang it for a teachers’ conference at my high school, it’s just always been my go-to performance piece. Also, I love Jekyll & Hydelike it’s my job. To stop my ears from bleeding, I’m going to just put this here. 

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PopePhilly

Aside from making fun of reality television on a weekly basis, PopePhilly is a legal assistant by day and avid kickball player by night (well, at least on Thursdays). On the nerd front, she is an active member of the forensic speech and debate community. She spends her time judging at tournaments throughout the country and serving on the board of directors for the West Chester University alumni chapter of Pi Kappa Delta (yes, speech nerds get to pretend to be cool by having Greek letters).

23 Comments

  1. 1
    vallegirl vallegirl
    Posted October 18, 2012 at 8:56 am

    I thought Bollywood and contemporary were the toughest assignments because they’re built on technique not specific moves. And it’s technique that ballroom pros aren’t that familiar with, if they’re familiar with it at all.

    With all the others, including hip hop and bolero, there’s a social analog to the professional dance so the celebrities can probably learn those dances, albeit never at a professional level because that takes years of training. But Bollywood and contemporary have no social dancing analog. They’re purely professional dances so even the ballroom pros are at a disadvantage because they’re training doesn’t usually encompass Bollywood or classical technique.

    Of course I also think the judges scored on a curve to account for this, which I thought made it fair.

    And fairest of all was losing Bristol so the rest was just icing, anyway. YAAAAY!

    But I’m on record as not “feeling” most of the Latin party dances on DWTS because they’re usually so non-Latin and Derek and Shawn’s mambo was no different. Packed with tricks and difficulty but none of the loose, free-moving hips and shoulders that make that style entertaining. Just listen to some Tito Puente or Perez Prado. It’s raucous and jazzy, not crisp and pristine. Shawn and Derek are such perfectionists that they didn’t have the “sponaneity” that should go with Cuban dances.

  2. 2
    Kathee Johnston
    Posted October 18, 2012 at 9:53 am

    Thank you so much for inserting the videos into your comments!!! I beg you to continue this format!!!!!! Funny, insightful, and informative recap as usual!!!!!!!!!

  3. 3
    Pikey578
    Posted October 18, 2012 at 10:59 am

    Bye Bristol! I am not sad to see your negative attitude leave the show. Kirstie may not be a great dancer but her attitude is infectious and she seems to really enjoy what she is doing. But, she should also be the next to leave. Great recap!

  4. 4
    wcsdancer
    Posted October 18, 2012 at 11:32 am

    I’m so over Emmit this season. Especially compared to Gilles.

    I have to disagree a little bit about Kirstie. She actually *is* a decent dancer…compare to Shawn. Of course Shawn is great at performing a choreographed routine, but she has no musicality. She dances on top of the music. Kirstie, on the other hand, is less skilled at perfecting the choreo, but she actually dances *in* the music. She really feels it. I enjoy that about her.

    Most of my knowledge of contemporary comes from SYTYCD, and I thought Val and Kelly did a respectable job (even though Kelly is not my favorite). Kelly is not a trained dancer, but she did a pretty good job with her lines, pointed feet, and finishing her moves.

    So glad Bristol is gone. She so obviously didn’t want to be there, I don’t know why she agreed to. Oh wait – MOAR MEDIA ATTENTION! Since, ya know, they won’t leave her alone. *eyeroll*

    I want Gilles to win. He should have in his season.

  5. 5
    Faye
    Posted October 18, 2012 at 1:48 pm

    Can we just skip the rest of the season and just watch the finale rematch with Gilles and Shawn? They were good in their original season but they have better partners and more relaxed rules and it’s letting them really shine.

    I don’t get the Sabrina love. She’s a good dancer but like Melissa amoung a group of people who can all dance, she is quite forgettable. If she wins this season I will make someone smaller and weaker than me each a roach

  6. 6
    PopePhilly PopePhilly
    Posted October 18, 2012 at 2:11 pm

    @vallegirl: I see where you’re coming from. However, I still think that some of the dancers benefited from the judges not being familiar with the dances. Yes, Gilles dance was cool (and I’m rooting for him to win the whole thing), but Len even flat out said he didn’t know anything about Bollywood – he simply liked the dance. I guess it’s probably better to say there were pros and cons to each side of it. However, I think we can all join hands across America and sing because Bristol is gone!

    @Kathee: No need to beg! The videos actually make my job a lot easier. 1.) I don’t have to pause every few minutes to get a screen grab (which is hard during the dances anyway) and 2.) I don’t have to try to describe the dances.

    @Pikey: As much as I don’t want to admit it, you’re right about Kirstie leaving. She’s got an awesome spirit and always seems to try hard, but she’s just not as good as the others. I’m sure some of that has to do with 1.) She’s significantly older than the remaining couples by at least 18 years (Emmitt being closest in age at 43) and 2.) I’m not calling her fat (I’ve ALWAYS had to struggle with my weight, so I’ll never judge someone else for theirs), but she’s definitely not in the same shame that Shawn or Kelly or Apolo is in.

    @wcsdancer: After reading your comment, I went back and watched Kirstie’s and Shawn’s dances and I think you’re right. Shawn seems to do this in a very technical way – this is her job, she gets it done. It’s impressive, but it doesn’t make you smile the same way that Kirstie just having fun will.

    @Faye: I won’t be too surprised if Sabrina wins the whole thing. It would be the ultimate comeback story. As long as Gilles makes it to the finals, I’m happy. :)

  7. 7
    Faye
    Posted October 18, 2012 at 2:27 pm

    @PopePhilly: For me what Sabrina lacks is that one defining moment/dance that gets someone to the finals regardless if they do crappy the rest of the season or not. Shawn has had 2 moments (quickstep, mambo) and Gilles has his Bollywood number. In Kelly Osbourne season it was her first dance (Waltz), Helio had the quickstep, etc. Every season someone has that one defining moment and all Sabrina has is she was kicked off early 10,000 seasons ago. She’s a good dancer but lacks that certain “ummmph” that makes her stand out to me. It’s what I called the Britney v. Christina argument. Christina has the talent but Britney has IT and IT goes a lot further than talent. I mean it’s the American way. Ask all of Beyonce’s back-up singers :)

  8. 8
    CoolKymom
    Posted October 18, 2012 at 5:57 pm

    Fab recap!!!

    So glad to see Bristol gone. Enjoyed Paula as a judge. Felt uncomfortable with Val and Kelly dancing in their underwear. But have to admit that my heart did a little flip when he sprinted up the stairs still holding her in his arms. I think those two are are feeling more than a dancing connection.

  9. 9
    CoolKymom
    Posted October 18, 2012 at 5:59 pm

    Also for some reason karina irritates the heck out of me. I wonder how apollo feels about having her as a partner. I can’t remember…who was his partner his original season????

  10. 10
    wcsdancer
    Posted October 18, 2012 at 6:22 pm

    Apolo had Julianne Hough his first time. I happen to like Karina, though.

    One thing I do like about Shawn is that she doesn’t emulate Derek’s over-the-top facial expressions. She just performs with a big smile on her face.

    I’d rather they stick to ballroom dances.

  11. 11
    chaosbutterfly
    Posted October 18, 2012 at 6:50 pm

    I want to roll Gilles in chocolate and crushed peanuts and then lick everything off.
    Lord, that man is hot. They need to make clones of his fine self.

    And if Val and Kelly aren’t doing the horizontal mambo, I’ll eat my hat.
    The way she talks about him is not how people talk about their dance partners.

    And Melissa needs to sit all the way down with her creepy Shawn obsession. I was so irritated when she said that she wanted the judges to tell her that she was a different person from Shawn. Bitch, they know you’re a different person. You’re the one who keeps on comparing yourself to Shawn.
    She and Tony get on my last nerve.

    Shawn looks like Chuck E Cheese.

  12. 12
    chooch850 chooch850
    Posted October 19, 2012 at 1:27 am

    Karina….. she was so focused on impressing Paula and Carrie Ann because Hip-Hop is their “thing”, she forgot about Apolo. She admitted in an interview after the show, that she fell because she “threw in” an unrehearsed karate kick, that Apolo didn’t even know about, and that’s when she fell down. She was just trying to show off and it blew up in her face. THAT’s why she was crying!

    I can’t believe you guys were bothered by Kelly and Val in their underwear… come on! What a bunch of prudes. Edyta wore less than that every single week. Give me a break….

  13. 13
    PopePhilly PopePhilly
    Posted October 19, 2012 at 6:33 am

    @Faye: I like the Brittany vs. Christina analogy. I’m going to start using that. I never really thought of this show that way before, but there definitely is something to the “it factor.”

    @Coolkymom: The underwear didn’t bother me – Shawn’s costume was just as revealing if not moreso. I was uncomfortable about the way they were acting toward each other when they were NOT dancing.

    @chaosbutterfly: The image of Gilles in chocolate is going to get me through this very long day. Thank you for that. As for the Melissa/Shawn thing, I wonder if they’re friends and jokingly call each other out and trashtalk and we only saw Melissa’s side of it. I’m really hoping she’s just not that creepy.

    @chooch: Argh! Well, at least Karina’s showboating didn’t get Apolo kicked off. I’m kind of indifferent on that pair, but I wouldn’t want to see him kicked out because of something stupid she did. Also, like I said before, the underwear didn’t bother me. I was uncomfortable watching Val and Kelly dry hump all night – on and off the dance floor.

    Also, in sad news, Anna is getting divorced. :(
    http://www.bittenandbound.com/2012/10/18/dwts-pros-seek-divorce-anna-t-and-jonathan-roberts/

  14. 14
    SaraKate
    Posted October 19, 2012 at 8:16 am

    EXACTLY PopePhilly! It’s not that they were wearing underwear, it’s their behavior in it. Gross.

  15. 15
    Pat Ledoux
    Posted October 19, 2012 at 9:11 am

    “You made little Lenny very hapy”, I hope he wasn’t talking about his penis….bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa too funny PP!!! (Though I had the same thought when he said it!)

    Let’s just call Gilles the winner and be done, I so adore that fine piece of man!

  16. 16
    PopePhilly PopePhilly
    Posted October 19, 2012 at 9:28 am

    @SaraKate: Pron doesn’t bother me either. Porn showing up in places where it shouldn’t (like a ballroom competition) bothers me.

    @Pat: Let’s all decided that “Little Lenny” is a euphemism for “penis.” We’ll make it a thing. I agree with declaring Gilles the winner. However, the show should finish its run with just him dancing for several hours each week. Even better, let’s just let him be shirtless or in a suit (he’s incredibly sexy in both) for the entire episode. Ratings would skyrocket!

  17. 17
    Pat Ledoux
    Posted October 19, 2012 at 11:44 am

    @PopePhilly I so agree, I thought Gilles got robbed last time, he can really dance and MAN he is sexy sexy sexy!!! I say let him just wear a thong though, why bother with anything else? I’d say naked, but that won’t happen unless he shows up at my house (one can dream).

    @chaosbutterfly, I’ll be glad to help you roll Gilles in that chocolate and such!

  18. 18
    chaosbutterfly
    Posted October 19, 2012 at 12:57 pm

    That’s sad, but not surprising about Anna’s divorce.
    They were just on an episode of HGTV’s Design Star All Stars, getting their condo decorated, and they seemed pretty disconnected.
    More like familiar roommates than married people.

    @Pat Ledoux, I appreciate the offer, but this is a one-woman job soo….yeah…gonna have to decline.
    You’re welcome to watch though.
    No touching.

  19. 19
    PopePhilly PopePhilly
    Posted October 19, 2012 at 1:08 pm

    @Pat: We should change up the clothing (or lack thereof) each week to keep it interesting.

    @chaosbutterfly: I would also like to be a ticket to watch the Gilles rolling event!

  20. 20
    kron
    Posted October 19, 2012 at 2:46 pm

    omg, first thing I thought when I saw Sabrina: Why is she dressed up like the Cookie Monster?
    I was really hoping Kirstie would win when I started watching this season, but I just don’t think she has the technical skill compared to everyone else unfortunately.
    My prediction is that it’s going to be between Shawn and Gilles again, but this time Gilles better win!!!!!! I love watching him dance and he seems so invested in every dance. Did you know he played a dance teacher in a recent episode of Royal Pains?
    Apolo is also really starting to grow on me. He really does seem to get sexier every week. :)

  21. 21
    SororSalsa
    Posted October 19, 2012 at 9:21 pm

    vallegirl….you are SO right. But I think that’s because ballroom “Latin” is a totally different animal from the salsa & mambo that’s traditionally danced. It’s based more on patterns than mambo, cha cha cha, son, etc. I taught ballroom before I started dancing salsa, and it was a relief not to have to be so stiff and not move my hips and shoulder, when the music made that natural. Also, what they were doing is closer to LA-style salsa, where a lot of tricks and lifts are common. New York style salsa is footwork heavy and you don’t see lifts and tricks very often.

    The cha cha that Cheryl and her friends was a bit closer to the cha cha that I’m used to…still a pattern, but perhaps because they were dancing to “Oye Como Va”, it was a bit more traditional and less ballroom-y.

  22. 22
    CattyFan cattyfan
    Posted October 19, 2012 at 9:36 pm

    Didn’t see Kelly and Val as looking any different from what we see every season on SYTYCD. Except Kelly sells the emotion better because she’s an actress. And the outfits weren’t all that revealing, either.

  23. 23
    Kylie
    Posted October 23, 2012 at 7:07 pm

    As a dancer without a ballroom background, I hated the Bollywood, Contemporary and Hip Hop dances, especially the Hip Hop. I don’t know who Karina got to help choreograph, but it was badddddddd 90s pop that nobody does or likes anymore.
    While the Bollywood and Contemporary were good tries, I noticed they were both songs that So You Think You Can Dance have used, and both of those dances were incredibly iconic for that show. I know that Jai Ho is pretty popular for that genre of music, but….

    Above all, I’m THRILLED Bristol finally went home. Her face and voice needed to go bye bye.

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