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Well, that ended abruptly. It was pretty good considering they’d been practicing that for a hour…well, an hour plus the rehearsal they did the night before. Is Tom yelling, “Come back, Shane”?
Len thinks that Kelly really went for it in the dance. Bruno yells about Kelly and Val being rabbits fucking. Got it. Carrie Ann thinks it’s impressive for being an instant dance. I wish they would stop calling these dances “instant.” They’re not really instant at all. I wish they would have just gotten a dance and a song and had been told to start dancing right away. THAT would have been an instant dance. It would be interesting to see how well the couples play off one another naturally
Carrie Ann – 9.5
Len – 9.5
Bruno – 9.5
87.5/90 for both nights
Melissa and Tony are up next dancing another samba. They’re amazed by pictures of themselves in their rehearsal room. That’s about it.
That was the slowest version of “Life Is a Highway” I’ve ever heard. Overall, it was another slow samba. Maybe I just don’t know what a samba is supposed to look like.
Bruno alliterates that Melissa is a sexy South American siren. Carrie Ann says that she rushed a little bit. Len didn’t think the interpretation wasn’t as good as it was the night before, but he always enjoys watching her dance.
Carrie Ann – 9.5
Len – 9.5
Bruno – 9.5
88.5/90 for both nights
Shawn and Derek are the last dance of the entire season with their instant cha cha. Shawn has learned a lot about herself over this season, but she still hasn’t learned to speak with her mouth open. Derek forces out a few tears talking about how much Shawn inspires him.
First, Aretha Franklin is the only person that should ever sing “Respect.” Second, I think Shawn and Derek tried to throw too much into that dance. With the instant dances, it seems that simple and precises is the way to go. By throwing to add in all those crazy moves, it looked like they were trying too hard. Maybe that’s just me.
Carrie Ann thinks that Shawn started as a star and has been nothing less than professional…except when she and Derek were doing everything but what they were supposed to do. Len thinks that Shawn just never gets stressed out and the dance was just fantastic. Bruno thinks Shawn is going out with a bang. Really? That dance was a bang? That’s a really small bang. I’d compare it more to some bubble wrap popping.
Carrie Ann – 10
Len – 10
Bruno – 10
87/30 for both nights
It’s finally time to announce the winner. Dear Lord, this has been a long season. Let’s get to this quickly.
In third place…
KELLY MONACO AND VAL CHMERKOVSKIY!!!
I’m OK with that – it seems about right. Despite not winning, I’m pretty sure that Kelly has proven to all the nay-sayers that she can, in fact, dance very well. Kelly is gracious in her interview. She compliments Val on being able to teach her how to dance even though she can’t stand on two feet and talk at the same time. Man, that must suck on the set of “General Hospital.” I’ve never watched the show. Does Kelly sit down the whole time?
And now, it’s time to crown the winner of “DWTS All-Stars.” Both are season 8 finalists – Shawn was the champion while Melissa came in third.
[I keep trying to put the video here, but the ABCDWTS Channel has their embed codes messed up. Every time I put in the code for "results part 2," "results part 1" shows up. For the sake of getting this up in a timpely manner, please imagine Melissa and Tony completely freaking out as they beat Shawn and Derek. Here is the link to the video if you want to watch it on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNr8_v0DxZo]
YAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! That “yay” is mainly for Tony. It’s about damn time he get a mirror ball trophy. I can’t lie, however. When Tom said, “Now they have one too,” Melissa’s face was fucking adorable! Also, I love how happy Val and Maks were about Tony’s win. I’m pretty happy too. It’s about time he got himself a trophy.
So, that’s it for the season, Gasmii. What do you think of the results? Thanks for reading all season…and perhaps even watching! It’s been a blast. Now, I’m going to pour myself a large glass of wine and then go to sleep. This season has been exhausting!