He’s figured out that she’s highborn and a northerner; how long til he connects the dots? Although I’m not positive Tywin knows Arya has been lost, since they’re keeping it quiet at King’s Landing.
Xaro wants to help Daenerys get her dragons back, but she’s not having it – she doesn’t trust him, and she doesn’t want to marry him, and she doesn’t give a shit about his money. Jorah also tries to calm her down to no avail. Her dragons are gone, her fave servants are dead; she has no Targaryens, Dothraki, or Westerosi to call her people; she wants Jorah to stop hitting on her all the time. Although he does look super hot and fitting his sigil, the Bear.
mm sweaty chest hair.
Jorah is off to the mysterious masked woman from the party to look for the dragons. She doesn’t have them, but she does have a mysterious question, asking Jorah, “Will you betray her again?” Hmm..
The masked priestess lady says the thief is with Daenerys now. That’s not that helpful, since she’s in a meeting with all of the Thirteen of Qarth. Oh, actually, I guess we aren’t drawing this out: the scary priest from the House of the Undying has the dragons, and Xaro stole them for him – in exchange for becoming King of Qarth. Xaro! You bastard! A whole group of creepy priests comes up behind the Thirteen, and kill all of them – minus Xaro, of course.
Daenerys tries to escape, but the creepy priest does his clone thing and stops her at every turn.
Cersei has sent her messenger to shoot down Robb’s declaration of kingship. Robb is merciful, as usual, and imprisons him with Jaime. Taleesa also stops by to ask for more medical supplies and stuff.
Jennifer Love Hewitt in the corpse whisperer
She wants Robb to pick up some stuff for her, but he tells her to come along instead. Come on, lazy Robb! When I ask for tampons, that means I want YOU to go get them, not for you to drive me to the store!
Jaime and his messenger cousin reminisce about tournaments and such. Apparently the cousin once squired for Jaime, and did a bang-up job and loved every minute of it. Jaime once squired for Barristan Selmy. It was amazing, blah blah blah. Fighting’s magical, blah blah blah. Being imprisoned in your own shit sucks, blah blah blah. Conversation then turns to escape. Jaime has a way out… but his cousin will have to die. I actually saw this coming; Jaime can get pretty dark.
kkk the crosseyes this week are getting out of control
He beats his cousin to death, then chokes the guard who comes in with his chains and makes a run for it.
Jaime’s escape was brief; by morning, he’s already been caught and mauled by a mob, including Lord Karstark, papa of the guard who was killed. Catelyn barely manages to stop Karstark from taking Jaime’s head. Jaime actually seems to be enjoying the excitement, despite the fact that everyone wants to kill him and he won’t last the night without Catelyn’s intervention. He rubs salt in Catelyn’s wounds, even though she’s the only thing keeping him alive, by talking about Ned Stark’s infidelity – the affair that produced Jon Snow. The scene cuts away after Catelyn asks Brienne for a sword.
Sansa’s having rape nightmares. Oh, you poor PTSD baby I know what that’s like. When she wakes up, reality is almost as bad: she has her period. Yes, bleeding from your vag for the first time is very scary normally. But in this case, it’s even more scary because it means that now you have to MARRY JOFFREY! AHHHHHH! Even though she and Shae try to hide it ASAP, a ladies maid and the Hound catch them. The Hound is confusing. He saved Sansa in the last episode, and seems to pity her, but turns her in when she gets her period and tells her he loves killing.
who would think such a lovely man could enjoy a good brutal killing?