Glee Project Recap: Everybody Cries

The Glee Project

By L-Money | Saturday, June 23, 2012 | 4:00 pm | 17 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Recaps, The Glee Project

Alright guys, this is the best week ever on GleePro- vulnerability! The only reason anyone tunes in to most reality shows is to see drama and tears, and when Ryan Murphy cruelly makes all the contestants spill their darkest secrets, you know shit’s about to go down. It’s also great when the people who haven’t really had struggles in their lives try to act all pitiful and make up shit so you feel bad for them (cough cough Lindsay from last season cough cough).

Thanks to @onehundredyearsofcholera for giving Aylin a WAY better nickname than I could have ever thought of. I laughed so hard when I read it. As they put it, “I call Aylin ‘Magic Carpet.’ Like, her magic carpet flies from one land to another.” Perfect! Honorable mentions go to @Karla for “Slutan” and @isthathissister for “Islut.”

Also, on all the giant posters for this show all over (read defaced Subway signs and sides of buses), the three people shown are Shanna, Blind Side, and Generic Hottie 2. So I’m gonna go out on a limb here and assume they’re making it pretty far, if not to the end.

Oh, and the commenters graciously told me (what would I do without you guys? probably cry) that Taryn went home last week because of two deaths in the family. So I kinda take back what I said about her just leaving because she missed her mommy. Why didn’t the show just say that, though?

Everyone cheers when Robert tells them the theme is vulnerability. I think they are programmed to cheer at anything and everything he says to them. Generic Hottie 2 is worried because he’s one of the aforementioned ones who had a normal life without disability or sex change or anything.

HW assignment is Kelly Clarkson’s “My Life Would Suck Without You.” Now, I love that song, but is it really appropriate for that week? It doesn’t have anything to do with the topic…

Blind Side seems a bit too concerned with picking song lines. WHY do they keep showing us the riveting footage of them choosing lines? It is extremely dull and unimportant. Magic Carpet doesn’t like Lily.

My face while being forced to watch this boring exchange

The guest mentor this week is Cory Monteith, AKA Finn Hudson on Glee. Hmm, this season they’re really upping the ante with the guest stars. Too bad the show isn’t as good to go along with it. Lily thinks Cory is attractive. It’s kind of cute. Also, outside of Glee it is super obvious this guy is like 29 and not a high school student in the least.

Well, Finn did always kind of ask like he had a glandular problem

He gives them some advice about making their characters real and thinking about stuff that’s important to you.

Also, whenever I hear Shanna’s name it makes me think of a doo-wop song, like sha-na-na-na-na, so I’m gonna be taking some liberties with the spelling of her name.

HW Grades

Anyone else catch this death stare Nellis gave Magic Carpet in the beginning?

Charlie- ugh. Holds the note for too long and isn’t good C
Shannananana- sounds just like Kelly. Is that good or bad? B+
Blind Side- tries to do too much with it vocally. His way of randomly putting in falsettos and stuff is starting to annoy me. It always sounds like he’s about to cry while he’s singing. C-
Tyler- fine. Kind of status quo. His voice works with Kelly though. B
Generic Hottie 2- uninteresting, as usual. Keep living up to your name, there, bud. C+
Magic Carpet- not a fan of what she tries to do with it. C
Abe- very good. Not too much, but still sets him apart. And for once he isn’t dancing, which makes him 20x better on its own. A-
Lily- sounds kind of like a deeper Kelly. B+
Wheelchair Barbie- enunciates too much. It’s weird. Also the way she stares at Cory while singing her line is borderline creepy. C+
Generic Hottie 1 (Blake)- I don’t like it when you go overboard with vocal stuff, but he didn’t try to do ANYTHING with it. Do or don’t do, there is no try. Or something like that. C-
Nellis- pretty good. It seems like her voice is the only thing setting her apart. She has an ugly singing voice, though. B+

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L-Money
About

Leah Michaels aka L-Money was deprived of cable TV as a child, so of course now she is obsessed with all things television. Hailing from Long Island, NY, she is currently a media studies major at Brown University. Besides sitting in front of the TV for hours, hobbies include video games, playing music, snowboarding, and being a DJ on the local alternative rock radio station. If you ever want to gush about the genius of Joss Whedon, discuss what kind of crack the Project Runway judges are smoking, drool over the food on Iron Chef, or sing show tunes, L-Money's your girl. Although she's young,  she feels she'll fit right in, as she's been making fun of people since she was eight years old (she was a precocious 2nd grader). Also, she loves cats. Like, a lot. She'll probably be a crazy cat lady when she's older, and she's OK with that. 

17 Comments

  1. 1
    Meaghan
    Posted June 23, 2012 at 7:01 pm

    Looks like next week Charlie gets a little too distracted by Magic Carpet…oh boy.

    Also Naya Rivera is there and it’s Sexuality week so I’m sure it’ll be a shitstorm of awkward.

  2. 2
    itchy itchy
    Posted June 24, 2012 at 1:20 am

    I don’t believe there has ever been a worse rendition of Fix You than this one. It’s a great song, my favorite version is this one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_n0zvoHlVk

    Blindside’s an asshat. His overly proper way of speaking is a cover-up for his poor grasp of English. I also enjoy the idea that both of this show’s “classically trained” singers have tin ears.

    Speaking of Lily… you can clearly see the bully in her. Watch the weird way her lips move — she’s just pure nastiness. Since most bullies are compensating for some deep-seated insecurity, it makes sense for her to have compensated in a different way (i.e., eating an entire McDonalds restaurant) as she got older.

    I still find Nellie strangely hot when she’s singing. She’s the only one of the bunch who actually seems to respond to the camera. That haircut of hers is doing her no favors though, makes her look like she wandered onto the show from a nearby psych ward.

    Does anyone here believe Abe is straight? There’s just no way in hell. No possible way.

    Oh yeah. I laughed like hell when Tyler revealed he’s a half-Jewish half-black transgender guy. Isn’t that the subject of Woody Allen’s next movie? Set in Bangkok, no doubt.

    Naya Rivera? I’m in! …. But she exemplifies why the Glee Project is a bullshit show — they’ve gone out of their way to stock the pond with homely girls, when the real show is the exact opposite. I think the Glee Project is really just an excuse for Ryan Murphy to find his next pool boy.

  3. 3
    ash310
    Posted June 24, 2012 at 6:02 am

    @Ichy — that is my all time favorite rendition of Fix You also. Brings me to tears every time I see it. Thanks for reminding me.

  4. 4
    S-Natch S-Natch
    Posted June 24, 2012 at 11:18 am

    I think the problem with Charlie grabbing Blind Side’s cane was that Blind Side was not expecting it. You could see a real look of terror and confusion on his face when it happened. In character or not, it was not cool. That being said, I am distressed that BS is starting to act like an ass – I was pulling for him (which is saying a lot during a season where they have given us virtually NO ONE to get behind and root for).

  5. 5
    itchy itchy
    Posted June 24, 2012 at 11:32 am

    I imagine if you got behind Lily you’d find plenty to root for… Hmm. Yes. Well, I know there’s a joke in there somewhere. Little help?

  6. 6
    sagittariuskim sagittariuskim
    Posted June 24, 2012 at 1:21 pm

    @S-Natch I agree with you. I was rooting for Blind Side too, until this episode.

    I guess I’m rooting for Nellis now and maybe The Generics , their the only people who don’t rub me the wrong way.

    Was it with all the unlikeable casts on reality shows this summer?

  7. 7
    onehundredyearsofcholera onehundredyearsofcholera
    Posted June 24, 2012 at 1:41 pm

    L-Money — thanks for the shoutout. Glad to hear I’ve atleast contributed to someone’s LOL-life. Greaaaat recap, btw!

    I agree, only Nellis and the Generics are the ones who has yet to rub me the wrong way. I *especially* hate the super misfits, Blindside and Wheelchair Barbie. Somehow they come across as thinking they are increeeeeedibly talented. Everytime Blindside speaks with his superproper formal-ish english, I ASDFLKJSAOWSFKASD so hard. Argh!

  8. 8
    Sam
    Posted June 24, 2012 at 4:57 pm

    funny how michael is the generic forgettable one, but he is probably the most likable. Maybe they don’t give him screen time because he is normal and that just doesn’t fly in the glee world.

  9. 9
    MrsTimRiggins
    Posted June 25, 2012 at 6:47 am

    I thought Lily’s whole “I used to be a bully until I saw the movie Mean Girls,” spiel was really fake. I buy she was/is a bully–but really, you watched Mean Girls and realized the error of your ways? BS. She just wanted a touching story to tell.

  10. 10
    itchy itchy
    Posted June 25, 2012 at 9:31 am

    My life, too, was forever changed by Lindsay Lohan.

  11. 11
    Kittkatt
    Posted June 25, 2012 at 7:23 pm

    I think they make a cream for that itchy.

  12. 12
    isthathissister
    Posted June 26, 2012 at 11:22 pm

    LOL @ “Dairy Queen Bee”

    And I totally agree with just about everyone that Blind Side was likable right up until this week, and even though I didn’t want to see him leave, I did think this week was some BULLSHIIIIIT. They can’t all be winners again, Ryan. I heard you say there will only be one winner this time. It’s only week 3. Send people home damnit!

    And is anyone else hating the frankensongs that they sing for their last chance performances? I know it was that way last year but it is just irking my nerves SO much more this time around. Do they sing the whole song and it just gets edited that way? Because Blind Side got a seriously butchered version of “Somewhere Over the Rainbow.” I would expect three gay men (Robert is gay, yes? I’m not even going to pretend to ask about Zach and Ryan lol) to have a little more reverence for Judy Garland than that.

  13. 13
    whatwhat
    Posted June 27, 2012 at 9:50 pm

    Number one most annoying thing about Glee Project: When the contestants get called to do a last-chance performance for Ryan. They’re given a song, and half the time they go “What is that? I’ve never heard that before?”

    Every single song they’ve done for last chance this season has been a song that was performed on Glee at some point or another. If these guys are such huge Glee fans, uhhhhh…why wouldn’t they recognize the songs they are given? Really?

  14. 14
    tv freak
    Posted June 27, 2012 at 10:10 pm

    @whatwhat, I watch just about every episode and often don’t remember every single song they’ve covered. That being said, some of them can be annoying. I think it’s inexcusable for any true Glee fan to not know one of the songs off Glee’s first CD, but that may be just me!

  15. 15
    DoYouReallyWannaKnow
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 4:24 pm

    Charlie is the love child of Finn and Blaine. He looks like Finn but has Blaine’s douchey personality. I predict he wins, Finn knocks Blaine up and gives birth to Charlie, finally leading to Kurt falling in love with Charlie because it’s Blaine and Finn rolled up into one. (plus it gives Ryan I MEAN KURT! another plot line).

  16. 16
    Raybelle13
    Posted June 30, 2012 at 6:57 pm

    @whatwhat– keep in mind that, for some of the songs, they haven’t seen a lot of the newest season eps, because the filming is overlapping the airing.
    As for “Dairy Queen Bee”– flippin hilarious! I swear, she was like “I watched Mean Girls and that was me!” and I was thinking “if they were all rolled into one body, maybe”
    I couldn’t tell you if the crying or the excuses were more ridiculous– god I’m bored.

  17. 17
    April
    Posted July 11, 2012 at 2:40 pm

    Lily is still the bully. Notice how uncompromising she was about the song lyrics when they were picking them. Nope she is a bully through and through. I know how to spot them. I wonder if she got fat later or was fat as a bully. I mean I guess you could be fat and popular, but not what usually happens.

    I did not sense any remorse in her either. It was like a humble brag almost to a point. Remember episode before this she says she was the one that threw all the parties kinda smug like. I loathe her. If she wins I will be SOOOO pissed.

    I am rooting for Nellie or the two cute guys. I kinda find Nellie very cute when she is not being weird acting.

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