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Alright guys, this is the best week ever on GleePro- vulnerability! The only reason anyone tunes in to most reality shows is to see drama and tears, and when Ryan Murphy cruelly makes all the contestants spill their darkest secrets, you know shit’s about to go down. It’s also great when the people who haven’t really had struggles in their lives try to act all pitiful and make up shit so you feel bad for them (cough cough Lindsay from last season cough cough).
Thanks to @onehundredyearsofcholera for giving Aylin a WAY better nickname than I could have ever thought of. I laughed so hard when I read it. As they put it, “I call Aylin ‘Magic Carpet.’ Like, her magic carpet flies from one land to another.” Perfect! Honorable mentions go to @Karla for “Slutan” and @isthathissister for “Islut.”
Also, on all the giant posters for this show all over (read defaced Subway signs and sides of buses), the three people shown are Shanna, Blind Side, and Generic Hottie 2. So I’m gonna go out on a limb here and assume they’re making it pretty far, if not to the end.
Oh, and the commenters graciously told me (what would I do without you guys? probably cry) that Taryn went home last week because of two deaths in the family. So I kinda take back what I said about her just leaving because she missed her mommy. Why didn’t the show just say that, though?
Everyone cheers when Robert tells them the theme is vulnerability. I think they are programmed to cheer at anything and everything he says to them. Generic Hottie 2 is worried because he’s one of the aforementioned ones who had a normal life without disability or sex change or anything.
HW assignment is Kelly Clarkson’s “My Life Would Suck Without You.” Now, I love that song, but is it really appropriate for that week? It doesn’t have anything to do with the topic…
Blind Side seems a bit too concerned with picking song lines. WHY do they keep showing us the riveting footage of them choosing lines? It is extremely dull and unimportant. Magic Carpet doesn’t like Lily.
The guest mentor this week is Cory Monteith, AKA Finn Hudson on Glee. Hmm, this season they’re really upping the ante with the guest stars. Too bad the show isn’t as good to go along with it. Lily thinks Cory is attractive. It’s kind of cute. Also, outside of Glee it is super obvious this guy is like 29 and not a high school student in the least.
He gives them some advice about making their characters real and thinking about stuff that’s important to you.
Also, whenever I hear Shanna’s name it makes me think of a doo-wop song, like sha-na-na-na-na, so I’m gonna be taking some liberties with the spelling of her name.
Charlie- ugh. Holds the note for too long and isn’t good C
Shannananana- sounds just like Kelly. Is that good or bad? B+
Blind Side- tries to do too much with it vocally. His way of randomly putting in falsettos and stuff is starting to annoy me. It always sounds like he’s about to cry while he’s singing. C-
Tyler- fine. Kind of status quo. His voice works with Kelly though. B
Generic Hottie 2- uninteresting, as usual. Keep living up to your name, there, bud. C+
Magic Carpet- not a fan of what she tries to do with it. C
Abe- very good. Not too much, but still sets him apart. And for once he isn’t dancing, which makes him 20x better on its own. A-
Lily- sounds kind of like a deeper Kelly. B+
Wheelchair Barbie- enunciates too much. It’s weird. Also the way she stares at Cory while singing her line is borderline creepy. C+
Generic Hottie 1 (Blake)- I don’t like it when you go overboard with vocal stuff, but he didn’t try to do ANYTHING with it. Do or don’t do, there is no try. Or something like that. C-
Nellis- pretty good. It seems like her voice is the only thing setting her apart. She has an ugly singing voice, though. B+