Grimm Recap: The Kiss

Recaps

By Madelyne27 | Wednesday, August 22, 2012 | 2:02 pm | 16 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Grimm, Recaps

A woman outside, walking her dog, hears the crashing and must call the police. But back in the living room, Scarface is able to wrangle her way out from under Catherine and looks around an entire room of potential weapons and hones in on a magazine laying on the floor. She scoops it up, rolls it up, and goes after Catherine like my dad used to go after our St. Bernard when he would eat an entire shelf of books. But seriously, a magazine… and the fight is over. Sirens are wailing and Scarface has to get outta there.

Not knowing his mom is busy killing her second person of the episode, Nick is being interrogated by the FBI (in the lamest interrogation, ever). There’s no passion, they admit the DNA was not a match but was a close relative and who is he covering for? Nick says “my mom”, but it seems that they don’t believe him, I guess because they think his parents are dead? I don’t know, they need Ice T to school them in interrogation techniques. Nick calmly tells them they should take credit for killing the international bad guy… and voila, they hand over his gun, the interview over. Nick is free.

(I’m so glad they don’t notice I’ve been beaten to a bloody pulp.)

Poor Hank was doing his bestest to flex and get Nick freed, but then sees Nick walking out on his own. Poor Hank, they can’t give him a good scene to save his life… just one door slammed after another.

Anyway, Sgt. Wu calls Hank and tells him they have another murder. They head over the Catherine’s house and Nick acts as if he’s never seen her, and when they mention her last name is Schade, Hank wonders if she is related to Adalind. Nick shrugs him off. Nice friend. Nice partner. Ass.

I can’t believe they wrote me out of the show, instead of Juliette.

Yippee, we’re at Casa d’ Renard and the jar of milky goodness. He stands in front of a mirror and looks at it and then does a half morph, and the parts that morph look a lot like a Hexenbiest. I wasn’t sure, so I did some research and read in an interview that his character is, in fact, half Royal, half Hexenbiest.

Still looks better than some guys I used to date.

So, he sucks it up and swallows it down. He starts to wretch and gag, finally tears off his shirt, breathes black smoke, falls down, turns bright red, and eventually recovers. I guess he had a little evil in him, but who doesn’t want some.

Tastes like the ocean, my ass.

 

We must use the same tanning bed.

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6
Madelyne27

It's never too soon. It's never too far. And it's never the wrong time.

16 Comments

  1. 1
    iceprincess
    Posted August 22, 2012 at 2:32 pm

    xanax? nap? yes, please.

  2. 2
    SuburBint
    Posted August 22, 2012 at 3:36 pm

    I am loving the new intro: “There once was a man…. This — is the life of a Grimm!” Not since BtvS has there been such a dramatic, tension filled, voiceover show intro.

  3. 3
    Whedonite
    Posted August 22, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    Birds have sex in the pretty standard way most animals do, with the male somewhat on top/behind.

    Goose sex is overly complicated because, to prevent the crazy amounts of rape amongst geese (it’s seriously high), the females have developed complex, tunneling vaginal entries while the males have, in competitive adaptation, developed corkscrew penises.

    As far as reproduction, the eggs are fertilized internally, then the female lays and incubates the fertilized eggs.

    There, I answered your bird sex questions. Got any more pics of Renard shirtless?

  4. 4
    Madelyne27
    Posted August 22, 2012 at 6:37 pm

    Holy cow, Whedonite… You’re my hero. But is goose rape considered “legitimate rape”? Can Grimm fans be political?

    I promise to always include at least one shirtless Renard pic. Regardless of relevance to the recap.

    Now I have to take a Xanax so I don’t dream about corkscrew penises.

    Goose rape. Haha. I can’t stop laughing.

  5. 5
    ChaCha
    Posted August 22, 2012 at 7:03 pm

    Isn’t “legitimate rape” an oxymoron?

  6. 6
    WishICouldDance
    Posted August 23, 2012 at 5:13 am

    Ok!! This is officially the most informative recap EVER!! I, too, was unaware of the issue of “goose rape” – what is the world coming to?

    Actually, this is the second bit of info I’ve picked up this morning. Apparently, there are roving bands of penis thieves in China. Seriously! A guy named Fei Lin had his penis stolen while he slept. I repeat, what is the world coming to!!!

    Not only do I love the recaps, I always look forward to the comments. You guys are awesome!!

  7. 7
    cosmonala
    Posted August 23, 2012 at 6:30 am

    If this potion caused Renard to Hulk out of his shirt, why couldn’t it do the same where his pants are concerned?

  8. 8
    Madelyne27
    Posted August 23, 2012 at 6:40 am

    @WICD, i looked up the story of poor Fei Lin, but found it odd that in the pic of him, the only thing blurred out was (were?) his eyes… and not to stereotype, but don’t most Asian eyes look alike? (and all you with sick minds, it was a pic from the waist up.)

    @cosmonala, exactly… plus his two little butterfly stitches remained in place during his Hexenbiest morph.

  9. 9
    Suebreeze
    Posted August 23, 2012 at 8:59 am

    Madelyn27, I’m loving the recap,. I’m a Grimm fan who also enjoys a little sarcasm & wit with my shows. The pics & comments are genius. Can’t wait to read more..thanks for the laugh this morning.. And the goose rape was an added bonus

  10. 10
    Tonya
    Posted August 23, 2012 at 9:43 am

    Renard is hot. #thatisall

    ..wait not quite. If Juliette falls in love with Renard..I QUIT!!

  11. 11
    Grimoire
    Posted August 23, 2012 at 10:17 am

    Thanks for the recap and since I was so quick to be critical over last week’s recap, I have to be equally willing to bestow the kudos on a very well written, wonderfully observant and deliciously snarky rehash. EXACTLY what I come to TVGasm to peruse. Thanks.

  12. 12
    zerocool
    Posted August 23, 2012 at 11:55 am

    yeah, I agree a great recap! You guys can have Renard, I prefer Nick. Although Renard is sexy when he speaks French.

    Juliette doesn’t bother me, I understand why her character is needed, it brings a sense of normalcy to the story. It’s Hank that I don’t like. I’m interested in seeing how they handle the revealing to him. I’m liking Scarface’s character and in particular the actress is excellent so kudos to them for hiring her. I like that she’s a badass, goofy magazine and all.

  13. 13
    Madelyne27
    Posted August 23, 2012 at 1:38 pm

    @suebreaz: I think the goose rape was an added bonus for us all.

    @chacha: Yes, I was making a Todd Akin goose joke.

    @Tonya: She can fall, as long as he rejects.

    @Grimoire: Again, thank you for your advice last week, I got me in line, bc y”all deserve the best.

    @zerocool: Hank reminds me of Meshach Taylor from Designing Women, so I have a hard time liking him too, but I don’t want to dislike too many people. And Nick is too young/short for me, but his mom, Scarface, is the perfect pick for a mysterious good/badass. I like Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio. And Juliette, I’ve just never been a fan of the weakly plotted side-stories. Like I don’t need to know about Stabler’s kids at home on Law & Order: SVU, just give me the case.

    Thanks so much for your comments, I’m so thankful for your input and laughs, and make sure you invite your friends to read too… (even if it means admitting that you read recaps… The first step is admitting it… the other 11 phases are for wimps.)

  14. 14
    Xanadu
    Posted August 24, 2012 at 2:32 pm

    Great recap this week, lots of laughs, going to turn my friends on to this!

  15. 15
    bluzgirl
    Posted August 28, 2012 at 8:11 am

    Great recap! I’m so glad I wasn’t the only one who noticed Nick threw his gun about 8 feet from shore. HAHAHA. Wuss.

  16. 16
    Madelyne27
    Posted August 29, 2012 at 2:51 pm

    @bluzgirl – i just have to tell you that when you called nick a wuss last week, it just made me laugh and then in this week’s recap, i ended up using wuss two or three times bc the word was stuck in my brain… 8 ft… wuss… it’s up there with “douche”…

Post a Comment

Your email is never published nor shared. Required fields are marked *

*
*

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

Human Verification: In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.