Last Episode: Mellie threw up, the girls went on a trip, Mellie threw up, the girls looked like highlighters and Mellie threw up.
We start off this episode with the girls, once again, out to eat. Yummm, trans fat. I mean seriously, how high is the bill that TLC pays to the restaurants? While eating their spinach dip, we have an intelligent conversation about the artichokes. Really? I’m losing IQ points here.
“Can I use this straw to suck out the hearts?”
Mellie storms into the resturant and of course is mad, yet again. She’s all pissed off at Laura and Kay-laa for not going to DA CLUB the other night. I guess they’ll never get the chance to meet that hunk of a guy that Mellie
stripped danced with.
Mel talking heads that “there ain’t no man who’s gonna tell her what to do” Lovely. Are we seriously only three minutes into this episode?
Later on that night, Nettie and Mellie are at Nettie’s house and giving each other makeovers. Mellie’s all nervous because she’s getting married in a week. I don’t think she should go through with it, but what do I know? They move on to the living room and start planning the wedding. Uhhh, crunching time there. Nettie asks what the color scheme is, lo and behold Mellie is choosing pink and cheetah. I can’t even anymore. Whatever.
We then jump from weddings to pregnancies and Nettie wants Mellie to take a test. No, not her GED, which she’d still probably finish before Chelsea would, a pregnancy test. Luckily it’s a negative. Crisis adverted.
Time sure does fly when you’re anxiously awaiting to meet Mellie’s mother. Speaking of which, it’s Robbie’s turn. Maybe he can teach her some SWEET fist pumping routines.
Hey, IDEAAAAAA! The whole crew should just bust out in a choreographed dance at the wedding. What a treat that would be.
Mellie gets mad again for some reason. She gets mad all the time. Anger management is needed.
Annie and Kayla are meeting up and Annie is mad a Laura. Did y’all follow all of that? Oh wait, I think it’s a bridal shower. Mellie shows up in her Victoria’s Secret sweatsuit and announces THAT SHE IS MOTHER EFFING PREGNANT. Oh and Robbie and her got into a fight. PLOT TWIST. Mellie is all sorts of upset about her pregnancy and she says she’s denying it until the baby pops out. I don’t know what’s going on in this show.
The reason Mellie is mad is because Robbie wants her to quit drinking and smoking. OH THE HORROR. She calls up her momma who sides with Robbie. Well way to go Lottie Mae, we’ll never hear the end of this.
But I will say this: I think Mellie had a rough childhood, but in the end it’s all on her. She has to choose to change.
Sondra is here and ready to fit Mellie in her dress, yet Mellie is a no show. We’re then treated to a simply delightful phone call between “Ninnie” and Mellie. Apparently, Lottie doesn’t want Nettie there for the dress fitting, nor does she want her there for the wedding. Nettie’s all “peace out bitches” and leaves so Mellie can try on her dress.