Gordon observes business that evening, and what he observes consists mostly of John being anal retentive, doing all sort of random work, from answering the phone, to vacuuming, to filling ice bins, none of which are jobs an owner needs to deal with.
“I’ve always wanted to be a busboy; it’s why I bought this hotel! Well, that and dinner.”
I have to give him credit: at least he has a work ethic. But he doesn’t really know what he’s doing, and they’re actually jobs that no one person should collectively deal with—there should be separate staff for the kitchen stuff and the phone, for instance. Gordon says it’s ruining the vibe. He then sits down for dinner and is waited on by fanboy Philip, who is literally sweating in anticipation of meeting Gordon.
John thinks Gordon will love the food. Yes, Gordon always loves boil-in-a-bag pork that’s stone cold in the middle. It’s the cornerstone of his successful culinary career.
He likes it so much, he’s saving this bite for later!
He makes people touch it, as per usual, and sends it back. And we get to meet Scooter! Poor, adorable, geeky prep cook Scooter, who’s sick of cooking in the microwave and serving up shitty “sous-vide” bags of slop. Seems someone actually has ambitions that extend beyond being a prep cook, and I’m sure he’d appreciate the practice using an oven and stove.
Give this boy some real work to do!
Do these people in charge of the food not know? That premade stuff is bachelor food, at best. And the pie, which is apparently the signature dish of the place, is a nightmare according to all the diners Gordon is polling. That shit gets served to him straight from the microwave, and is filled with RAWR apples. RAWR! John is worried that Rich will take things personally and freak out when Gordon hands him his own ass. I advise Rich to brace himself, maybe on one of those wall curtain rods.
Gordon heads to the back for some ass-handing, and wants to know why everything is in a bag. Is it because Rich can’t cook, or because he’s lazy? Rich says he designed the whole menu to be cost effective and able to be prepared whether he’s there or not, but problem is that means the whole thing just sucks. Gordon accuses him of being lazy again, and Rich tells us that if Gordon says that one more time, there will be a problem.
Oh please, Gordon. Say it one more time.
Gordon tells him he can’t call himself an executive chef when he serves a store-bought menu. John typically tells us that he knows things seem bad, but he’s sure he’s doing all the right things to run the place. Oh, okay. That must be why you’re losing all your money—because you’re doing the right things.