Hey, everbody! (I love when Flip says that on Watch What Crappens. And yes, the misspell was intentional.) I’m back. The ever-benevolent Flip has let me return to recap LA Shrinks, and this time I’m sure I won’t be bored to tears.
Remember when a confidential relationship was just that? Lawyer/client, doctor/patient, priest/victim? Well, this is Bravo, people, and they managed to find 3 shrinks, and 3 clients, willing to open up about their personal issues. In LA! Shocking, I know. But I have to tell you – after watching the first episode, I find the shrinks to be, what’s the word rarely used to describe Bravo TV? NORMAL. Relatively speaking. I actually like these three!! Let’s meet our docs, shall we?
First – let me start off by saying I have a problem with strange name spellings. I don’t know why. Probably because I have many friends and relatives who can’t spell my name correctly. It’s Cynthia, Cindy, or Cyn. Simple. My friends will use Cyndi, Cin, Cyndie, Cindee. GOD, I hate that. I should see a shrink. But I digress.
Our first doctor, and my favorite, is Venus Nicolino. I’m going to pretend she’s Greek so I can get past the name. Bear with me, people. She has two Masters degrees and a PhD. I feel stupid already. I want a Master’s degree, dammit. She’s full of great phrases like “Don’t shit in the sunshine.” There’s a shot of her getting dressed while she talks about her life. I find that gratuitous, unnecessary and annoying. Just a case of Bravo trying to be slick and sexy. Dr. V has a cute husband, 2 biological kids, and 2 nephews she has permanent guardianship of due to undisclosed circumstances. Major props for stepping up, Dr. V. ”I’m surrounded by dicks”, she says. She works out of an office in her gorgeous home in Bel Air.
Just Chillin’. Oh, and smoking is bad, m’kay?
Our first (camera-hungry) clients are an engaged couple who are having sexual problems. Apparently, he’s way too big for her. What a shame. After some discussion it comes out that she was raised in a convent until the age of twelve. If the nuns can’t get some, you ain’t gettin’ some. Thanks, Catholic religion! She also “directs” him too much during sex. The guy (Michael) looks so uncomfortable at times. Why are you on TV, then?
That’s the hotness right there.
The doctor decides that there are communication problems in bed, and that Mikey needs a “map to the va-jay-jay”. He suggests he record themselves during sex so Dr. V can listen in. Forget what I said about them being uncomfortable.
Dr V. tells us that she became very depressed as a young adult, and was misdiagnosed, given lots of medication, even told she couldn’t have children. Twenty years went by before she was properly diagnosed as hormonal. We learn all this as we watch her in the tub. I don’t need to see her in the tub. Her husband, Matt. Brings her some wine and she pulls him in. Once again, TMI. I wonder how the cameraman (woman) feels about shooting these scenes. And did they ask her to do that to her husband? I hate Bravo.
I don’t need to see this. Her bathroom is a big as my first floor, for God’s sake!