Love In the Wild Recap: The BJ Face Edition

Recaps

By MrsMiaWallace | Thursday, June 14, 2012 | 12:00 pm | 7 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Love in the Wild, Recaps

And with that, she and Jason basically retire from the episode. I assume its because they are boning in the jungle and not because they are the next couple to go and producers would rather us not bond with them. The zombie monkey Shauna, who is looking more monochromatic by the day is stuck with a useless Ryan and she is vocal about his uselessness. He  has now noticed what I believe turned off Christian (the first to be turned off wins!) about her. She shouts and frenetically orders Ryan around while doing nothing of value herself. Too bad he’s so weak he has to suck up to that nutjob to stay on.

The things Ryan had to do to stay on the show were so graphic he had to be blurred

Ryan is disappointing Shauna who interviews she is “sick and tired of taking care of someone”. I guess it is a hard life being a zombie. When you suck someone’s brains out you probably then have to do a lot of care-giving to make the relationship last. Give me GI Summer any day. She never bothers shouting, because she’s too busy winning the challenge herself.

 

The next phase is jumping off a cliff into a lagoon. Ali freaks and Chase basically gives a short pep talk and then goes ahead and gently pushes her in. She fall/jumps mid-panic attack and again his training with the Marines has proven invaluable in these situations.

“How big do you want it to be?”

She needs someone tough and capable and instead of being furious, appreciates that without the push she would’ve waited all day. Also he’s hot, NBC is totally doubling down on this guy.

All teams put together nets pretty easily and advance to the pool. Frankly, I am once again floored by the lack of drama and incompetence. I can only conclude everyone does more homework than MrsMiaWallace and saw last season which probably had similar challenges so the contestants may have been tougher than they looked and knew somewhat the situation they were facing. I just think fear of heights is common and jumping into waters of untested depth is idiotic. I do realize NBC obviously checked for safety and divers were probably hovering below the surface in case someone slipped or Jenny M needed to be pulled from her cryogenic underwater lair for an emergency bad joke. However, knowing that and feeling that are different things and even looking at the challenge makes my hands sweat a little!

“You still have sweat glands?”

All the other teams jump – Summer hesitates for a second and then goes for it and Dr. Cox feels he may have met his equal at last. Too bad his scale doesn’t have a higher level than himself or he would realize equal is not what Summer is. That Amazon needs to be on a tougher show. Tara and Jesse are working well together, she surprises him by jumping without issue and is really working hard despite coming across as a bubbly princess initially. Cina is afraid and so makes Jason go first to make sure it’s safe and then quickly goes for it. Cockney Ben is the more nervous one and wisely steps away from the edge before committing, but Ginger Jen dives in immediately like a toy soldier by his side. Yanina and Ken float down on clouds of love. I’m pretty sure the way they handled this challenge is an obvious metaphor for each relationship, but I really appreciate we are not getting any platitudes on love being a leap and blind faith and blah blah Chris Harrison bullet to the brain.

Now we meet the old man Jenny M had to blow in a faux Dominican farmer’s hut. The budget of this show does not allow for any attempt at authenticity and I appreciate that, it looks like something put together as a prop for a play during vacation bible camp. I’m saying this “old man” is one of the producers that just hasn’t shaved for a week. He doesn’t speak and simply points to a sign indicating what the net is for.

No ha-blow in-glace?

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MrsMiaWallace is an east coast girl with a  penchant for travel, libations and great cuisine. She is not known to turn down a mimosa or a martini and finds the transition between the two a good way to mark the passing of time since she can never remember to wear a watch. Her secret love for reality tv and addiction to Bravo have drawn her like a moth to the glittering snark of TVGasm,  where she finds there are others like her... hopefully also nursing Bloody Marys.

7 Comments

  1. 1
    itchy itchy
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 12:45 pm

    Initially, I was prepared to give Ms. McCarthy a pass, but that voice! That horrid, grating voice! Everytime she speaks it’s like spikes being hammered into my ears!

    I like the show though. It has a similar spirit to Beauty and the Geek (the second-best reality show of all time, after Forever Eden).

    Summer scares the shit out of me. But as long as Ali wins it, I’m good. I’m happy Tara’s getting laid though.

    I bet none of the guys switch for the new bimbos — they’ve probably already developed a tribal mentality, and they’ve already eliminated the two weakest links in that.

    Speaking of which: they were teasing the new bimbos thing all episode and then… pfft! Enough to give a guy a case of reality tv blue balls.

  2. 2
    TVgasm Addict
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 7:42 pm

    I thought this episode was hilarious. The show is completely ridiculous, and since Jenny is also completely ridiculous, I don’t mind her as the host.

    MrsMia what is going on with the zombie monkey-ness? Geez was she psychotic or what? Since I watched her on tv, I am allowed to pass judgment here…Shauna sure did seem up tight and bitchy for a yoga instructor. And what was going on with the flesh toned lip gloss? Odd. Good bye Shauna, don’t let the door hit you on your exposed butt cheeks on the way out.

    Unlike you MrsMia, I may be developing a soft spot for Ben the Brit. British expressions are so funny. Even if a Brit guy is a total doucher, it somehow it gets disguised as clever because you’re never entirely sure what exactly they’re saying. Oh, and I love me some tatted up soccer players. That is all.

    I like Ali and Chase. Or maybe I just have a girl boner for Chase, and could take or leave Ali.

    Team Tairhead seem perfect for each other.

    Finally, dear Jason and Cina: Being stable and decent does not good tv make. One of you needs to flip your shit over something minor, and do it soon.

    Looking forward to the skank parade, or whatever it’s called, next week!

  3. 3
    ohhhyeah
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 8:59 pm

    In my opinion Ginger Jen is the best looking of the girls and probably the only one I could tolerate in real life, so it’s a shame she’ll be leaving us next episode.

    It would be great if they continued to bring in an alternate group of guys and girls after every elimination.

    This episode was a little tame, but I find it refreshing that the producers don’t seem overly intent on inventing or exaggerating storylines just for the sake of creating drama.

    “but I really appreciate we are not getting any platitudes on love being a leap and blind faith and blah blah Chris Harrison bullet to the brain.” Indeed; if that were the case I would not be watching.

    I hope they continue to put snake pit/cliff jumping type challenges into the competition. Seeing people lose their shit is my favorite part of the show.

  4. 4
    itchy itchy
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 11:45 pm

    I’m waiting for the show to have a competition like this:
    http://youtu.be/xsL7SXwMcZ8

    Although it would have been nice if they’d had something like this before that drinking problem douchebag got eliminated.

  5. 5
    #TeamTairhead
    Posted June 15, 2012 at 2:40 pm

    As a participant, I never comment on articles, but I have to say that this one is holyshit-hilarious. Thanks for the great read and keep it up.

  6. 6
    Mummy Butterfly
    Posted June 15, 2012 at 3:21 pm

    @itchy – YAY for Beauty and the Geek! I LOVED that show!

    I seriously thought that if I didn’t watch this season of Love it the Wild, but read the recaps, it would keep the nightmare that is JennyM out of my head. It’s not working. I see the screencaps of her and die a little inside as her voice echoes in my head. She is one of the most annoying people on the planet. And I watch Hell’s Kitchen…

  7. 7
    fancyface
    Posted June 15, 2012 at 7:18 pm

    Thank fuck Tom went home. He had my hate @ ‘Sumner came in first. She EARNED me’. Ugh…..HATE!

    @teamtairhead…..Tara is that you? How’s life in the M.I.A.?

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