He said it. Zombie-face Shauna is openly shopping to replace Ryan Who Dares to Not Love Her and since Cockney Ben has a penis she realizes it is meant to be. Oh and he has an accent. Dr. Cox tries to apologize for the Cake Incident during Night Vision Pillow Talk but Summer has no interest in men who can’t hold their liquor.
Also she does not appreciate having sex in uncomfortable places
She finds Ryan Who Will not Love roaming aimlessly around the campground and an idea sparks. He is not a douche like Dr. Cox, but so far he seems like the weakest link so I’m thinking Summer is not going to find love this go-round. Then again, she may be someone who can only be with someone she can dominate. Since that couple would secure the future of humankind I second this match.
Their kids will have great asses however
They now dress up and hit the Elimination hut. Although Ali dropped blue eyes for being a bestie, her powers of helplessness turn even the rugged marine into a lady-servant.
I have a selection of barrettes if you would like to see options
They spend a ridiculous amount of time dressing and doing hair and makeup for… what exactly? They do realize the cameras are filming all the time, right? As for Jenny McCarthy, her eyes are really just serving as emergency flairs begging for release from the bleached tower of immobile Botox at this point and not really registering her environment. She just gets trucked in on a handcart like Hannibal Lecter and pointed in the right direction.
Fava beans and a nice Chianti
Jenny M lets them know that they can now swap out if they like (and if the chosen person agrees) in the order of challenge win. The guys get to decide first this time. Chase and Ali get dramatic music played over their banal acceptance of each other. Summer drops Dr. Cox like a bad habit over the Cake Incident. It’s actually being called that now. I’d be annoyed but I feel it’s just a good excuse to get rid of someone so obviously douchetastic. Summer picks Ryan and the Zombie is now excited and terrified at being abandoned.
Did she eat Ali’s brains and absorb her style off camera?
Every other couple stays put with varying degrees of excitement (Ken is already color coordinating outfits with Yanina). The zombie had her man stripped away, so now gets to decide between Cockney Ben and Dr. Cox. Cock sandwich! She of course take the opportunity to ask for the Brit to abandon Ginger for her. Despite what he said about shaking monkeys earlier, I think he did enough recon to realize the ginger is the wayyy more stable of the two neurotic girls.
The realization he has to hurt one of two nutjobs
He reveals his choice in a complete gentleman’s fashion and says Jen deserves to stay in the game, with or without him. Am I developing a soft spot for a tattooed joker face who needs elocution lessons?!?? In short, no.
So we lose Dr. Cox and zombie monkey! The two most interesting people so far! They better bring out the sluts ASAP. Dr. Cox calls Ryan the “anti Tim” which may be true and can only work in Ryan’s favor, and feels disappointed his alpha-ness didn’t work out well with this bunch of genuine and nice people. Given all the reality shows that reward asshole behavior I think he has a real future on Fox or VH1. The Zombie has a mild farewell speech but she does rub her eyes at some point and reveal the toll a few days without brains has taken on her.
I think it’s melting
Then the parade of sluts arrives as a teaser for next week! We have generic looks replacements for Tara, Cina and Summer and the much-anticipated Boobs McGee!
One of these things is not like the others