MasterChef Recap: F$#k the Calypso Burger!!!

18 Comments

1. 1
   Jimbob Jones
   Posted July 7, 2012 at 1:25 am

   Great recap, as usual. Less geek references than normal, though. I can’t help feeling disappointed. Since it’s hot out there (I’m in Cali, the only seemingly reasonably-temperatured place on the planet right now), I’ll chalk it up to the heat.

   I can’t say I’d really miss anyone on the final 4, even Anna. They all kind of sucked.

   For someone who seemed cool at the beginning of the season, BR turned into a monstrous squatch. A monstrous, smelly squatch.

   Based on her reasoning in picking Tali, I now LOVE Becky. That’s how to play the game without being an asshole about it. Even if it keeps Tali around, she’s brilliant in how she’s playing it. “Pick the strongest team, but pick the weakest player first”

2. 2
   Andyourlittledogtoo
   Posted July 7, 2012 at 2:16 am

   Stacey picked Tali, not Becky.

   My favorite line from the entire episode, stated several times no less, was ‘NOT ALL OF THEM.”

   “The hamburger is raw! There are CHILDREN out there! You can’t serve raw hamburger!”
   “Yeah, but not ALL of them.”

   What a delusional strange man.

   As someone who has spent more than her fair share of time on Venice Beach I didn’t think Indian food was a strange choice for a food truck. And the beachgoers agreed with me because they lined up for it just fine. Venice is not a regular beach, it’s not like any place else on Earth actually. Normal rules don’t apply there. What I did think was unfair was that there was a real possibility that no one who got stuck with Indian food would have any idea what it was or how to cook it. Indian is not a commonly understood food, not in the same way American or Mexican would be. The fact that someone knew it well on that team was just pure luck. I also don’t think it was fair that the price was pre-set so number of customers would be completely random based on the whims of beachgoers. Customers didn’t vote on which was best and had no way of determining that prior to deciding to buy at that truck. And the quality of the food had no bearing on the winner (unless word got out that the hamburgers were raw, which who could have foreseen that happening?). The teams were so close in sales that it was just meaningless who won versus who lost. The elimination challenge was the only place that actual talent as a cook seemed to make much difference, and that is where BR shone in spite of his horribleness.

   All in all a strangely meaningless episode. But it did give me my favorite line which I will have to use whenever someone criticizes anything potentially lethal that I serve to my guests: But it wasn’t ALL of them!

3. 3
   Leto
   Posted July 7, 2012 at 9:21 am

   I noticed Monti’s Ray bans too. And that made me angry too. I just had to buy new glasses last month, and the ray ban in the shop where i went were at least 500€ (613,65$ says the converter). So I officially don’t like Monti.

   You can’t cry that you’re poor on tv and that you don’t know how to feed your family and wear 600$ glasses, that’s just unrespectul for people who really struggle.

4. 4
   chaosbutterfly
   Posted July 7, 2012 at 9:33 am

   ^Me too.
   That and “I’m cooking burgers faster than they can serve them”.
   It’s like Duh, because you’re not cooking them. You’re dropping them on the grill long enough for the exterior to be deceptively brown and juicy, but not long enough to kill the bacteria and parasites living within. Asshole.

   Indian food was a weird choice, but I didn’t think it was terrible. My only problem is that it was not as beach friendly, because it’s something that you want to eat with utensils. And if I could pick between finger food and utensil food at the beach, I would definitely go for the finger food. Italian might have been better though. Everyone likes pizza.

   lol at how when Bastage announced that the challenge was tortellini, the camera immediately swung to Frank the Tank smirking from the safety of the balcony.

5. 5
   Susan Meyers
   Posted July 7, 2012 at 9:58 am

   Just have to pipe in here. I have Ray Ban prescription glasses just like Monti and I don’t make a lot of money. Can’t remember if I got them at LensCrafters or Pearl, but they’re really not much more than most frames. Maybe $50 more. It’s the actual lenses that are expensive and where these places make their money. Have to defend the Hooch on this one.

6. 6
   Andyourlittledogtoo
   Posted July 7, 2012 at 10:48 am

   Venice isn’t so much like going to the beach, it’s more like going to the fair. Street musicians, vendor stalls, muscle beach area where folks work out, skating, bicycling, lots of little restaurants and shops along the strand — it’s a whole microcosm of the strange and wonderful and scary. And the food trucks had tables and chairs set up outside them where folks who wished to do so could sit and eat their food. If it were any other So Cal beach I’d be right there with you in questioning the selection, but Venice is just different. People go there expecting it to be weird and different. It’s kind of exhausting, actually.

   I didn’t notice the Ray Bans myself, but her attitude and behavior has always bugged me. If she is, on top of what bugs me, also lying about her destitution I will be seriously miffed.

7. 7
   Jimbob Jones
   Posted July 7, 2012 at 12:28 pm

   Shh, guys, don’t bash WannaHooch. Remember what happened last time?

8. 8
   Leto
   Posted July 7, 2012 at 12:50 pm

   @Susan Meyers : really? wow. In France Ray Ban frames are just a luxury. They’re about the same price as Chanel frames, for example. Like I said before the cheapest I’ve seen are around 600$, maybe 450 in cheaper store. Lenses are about 100$ each (very good lenses), so a pair of Ray Bans are really NOT for a poor single mom in my country ^^. (glasses are not for poor people in fact ^^’)
   Maybe my anger was misplaced.

9. 9
   Ed
   Posted July 7, 2012 at 1:28 pm

   I have a pair of prescription Ray Ban sunglasses and they weren’t all that expensive after insurance. Monti also may be someone who does take care of her glasses. I am and my glasses still look new after a few years.

10. 10
    Dangerously
    Posted July 7, 2012 at 1:31 pm

    Yeah, they’re nowhere near those prices…but for someone with “$50 in the bank,” and living in pure desperation, $150 on frames is too much. You can quite easily get frames for under $100…

11. 11
    michkabibbles
    Posted July 7, 2012 at 3:50 pm

    dangerously-you hit the nail on the head about why i just don’t like monti. i just think she’s extremely disingenuos, and is ‘acting’ for the cameras more than any other contenstant. compare her to christine, who just seems so down to earth and natural. it’s a shame because i want to like monti, i think she’s one of the better chefs in the competition.
    personally, i think her glasses are fake (isn’t that what hipsters are doing these days? wearing fake glasses?), which makes the expense even more galling.

12. 12
    Ali
    Posted July 7, 2012 at 5:56 pm

    I’ve found designer frames like Ray Bans for under $100, so that didn’t really faze me that WH had them. I was wondering why the heck Joe was clutching his pearls so much over Anna whizzing the dough in the food processor. Guess he doesn’t watch his mom…Lidia Bastianich made pasta dough in the food processor on TV and made no bones about it. I figure if it’s good enough for Lidia, it’s good enough for me. The problems with Anna’s tortellini weren’t because she put it together in the processor…it’s everything that happened after that.

13. 13
    Yeknom
    Posted July 9, 2012 at 11:17 am

    Dangerously….I thought the same thing about the weather when BR said it. It’s HOT here (Chicago), but it’s not the first time ever. BR’s an idiot. In fact both BR and Tali are embarassing. They make me worry that everyone’s going to think we’re all whiny pompous and delusional.

    Glasses aside, there’s something about WH that really rubs me wrong. Maybe it’s how she throws the I’m a poor struggling single mom around. Not many struggling single moms I know go on a TV show for weeks on end, usually because they’re stuck working their asses off to make ends meet.

    Am I the only one that was surprised that Anna was only 28? I thought she was a lot older.

14. 14
    MummyButterfly
    Posted July 9, 2012 at 6:47 pm

    @Yeknom – I thought Anna was older, but I wonder if that was because her husband looks so much older, and I just “matched” the two in my head.

    As for Monti, I refuse to even go down that route (especially since I’m sitting here in 2.5 year old frames that have a broken piece).

    BR? PLEASE GO HOME! And I am loving Josh and Daredevil. I was glad they not only got Indian, but rocked it!

15. 15
    MummyButterfly
    Posted July 9, 2012 at 7:10 pm

    Oh, I totally forgot my favorite part of the season so far – and it had nothing to do with “cooking”. When they were showing the pressure test chefs how to make the tortellinis and the camera showed the balcony, I almost cried.

    Regardless of how they are “portrayed” by editors and producers on TV, you can’t fake the sweetness of Josh kneeling beside Daredevil to take her hands and demonstrate for her how the tortellinis are made. That’s just a GOOD PERSON on the inside, who is helping out a competitor for the right reasons – because it’s a good thing to do. I love them!

16. 16
    caligal
    Posted July 9, 2012 at 7:34 pm

    @andyourlittledogtoo….I totally agree about Venice. It’s definitely the most interesting place to people watch. When the family/friends come to town and say “show me LA”, I take them to Venice Beach for the day. There is enough to keep everyone interested and occupied, with a couple of cool, cheap bars nearby. Afterwhich, everyone is exhausted and ready to go home. All without driving all over town. Perfection.

17. 17
    Yeknom
    Posted July 10, 2012 at 9:06 am

    Mummybutterfly — that’s what I thought too about Anna, that maybe I thought she was older beacuse her husband definitely looks a lot older.

    Also, that was such a sweet moment (Josh and DareDevil). I like Josh, he seems like a genuinely nice guy.

18. 18
    sheesh
    Posted July 10, 2012 at 5:55 pm

    This! This is why I am Tvgasm’s bitch and always will be.
    Dangerously…love it. You are the lense in my Ray Bans.
    Not really…I can’t afford lenses.