MasterChef Recap: F#%king Breakfast…

32 Comments

1. 1
   michkabibbles
   Posted June 29, 2012 at 10:15 am

   i was actually pretty shocked that FE stepped forward at the end. i was kind of hoping they’d keep him and throw out aaliens for that gesture (although a double elimination would have been the best result).
   hopefully tali gets eliminated next episode, he really is the worst (not to mention completely delusional about his mad skillz). none of the rest really bother me too much. although i’d love to see daredevil win it all. she always seems to pull it together.

2. 2
   LAC
   Posted June 29, 2012 at 10:33 am

   BWHAHAHAHAHA!!! Loved it! Loved watching the superdouche twins have their power of douche cut off. Bye flavafop! Get into the douche mobile and drive away now. And seriously, Tanya, Flavafop is as deep as a drop of water on a kitchen counter. He will neeeeeeeeever do you, okay? He thinks that he could get Blake Lively with a smile.

   Wow, the mean little tricks on the contestants have been upped this season. I think they enjoyed watching Flavafop sweat it out before stepping to claim his plate of chocolate runs.

   Thanks for the great recap!

3. 3
   MummyButterfly
   Posted June 29, 2012 at 10:42 am

   I wasn’t happy AT ALL that FE stepped forward. I don’t like him (don’t get me wrong), but both desserts looked like crud and AAliens TASTED like crud. To me, FE needed more time in the pressure test, while AAliens needed an entirely new cake recipe!

   I figured they couldn’t send Josh upstairs, because he was team leader – and Anna, poor Anna was just the odd girl out. They probably thought she could handle the molten lava cake, so didn’t feel bad about keeping her downstairs.

   As for poor Felix, she just got blindsided. Hubby and I were talking about how dumbfounded she looked, but at the same time, she was getting plates out, just without communicating. I don’t think the Red Team realized HOW MUCH they needed to talk with a blind leader. I wonder how much of Christine speaking up simply got everyone else to talk, so she could keep a better handle on things.

   Tanya, I don’t know what to say. She strikes me as the kind of girl who got so excited when a “cute boy” talks to her, and at some point FE talked to her – so he must be TOTALLY AWESOME! Of course, it could all be editing, I mean, FE wasn’t that awful when he left. He’d been awful the rest of the time, but arrogance comes off as cute to lots of people (especially when the arrogant give them attention). *SPOILER* Kind of like when BR was trying to figure out in the next episode if he ever even talked to Tanya… Sounds like she was ignored by a group of people…

   BR made me SO ANGRY when he accused the Red Team of cheating. That’s quite arrogant to me, also!

   As for DareDevil and Josh, it looked like after she made the trade she made a turn towards where she knew Josh was standing. I would bet MONEY she was apologizing (in a sweet, competitive way) for stealing Becky and giving him FE. I imagine those two are part of the “other group” that hangs out off-camera. I’m almost suspecting there are more than two divisions here… More like 3 cliques, that really don’t like each other, but DareDevil, Josh, Cowboy Hat and a few others seem to at least attempt to base some judgements on talent, rather than personality.

   Of which AAliens has neither…

4. 4
   Sunshine
   Posted June 29, 2012 at 12:00 pm

   Love the blind girl….she is amazing and she is not obnoxious at all….I really hope she will win but I think at some point her not being able to see will hurt her…

   I was so happy that douchbag went home….I was afraid they would keep him until the final three like they kept that asshat last season that though he was the best thing since porta potties…..but I was hoping they would both be sent home. I think he only stepped forward thinking that would save him….that it was a trick.

   You would think by now….after watching all these shows…that arrogant people would learn to shut the hell up during their talking heads and not claim they will be the winners…..that is truly a kiss of death and turns the audience against you…it happens on all of these cooking shows….what idiots.

   This recap is the best…and invariably I see comments I have been screaming at my television while I watch the show alone in my kitchen while my family mocks me from the other room for being crazy. So what? Crazy is fun.

5. 5
   exhero
   Posted June 29, 2012 at 12:27 pm

   Oh poor FE if only he had his rings. Maybe then his pile of cake would have come out in a perfect circle.

   In all honesty though based on overall performance I feel like AAliens should have gone home seeing as he’s somehow mistaken this for an art competition. Though I figure of the two he’s a far more entertaining brand of deluded.

6. 6
   MummyButterfly
   Posted June 29, 2012 at 12:30 pm

   @exhero – I TOTALLY forgot about FE’s rings! You are so right.

7. 7
   LAC
   Posted June 29, 2012 at 12:41 pm

   @sunshine – crazy is the new black and we here at Tvgasm are very fashionable!

8. 8
   unwise
   Posted June 29, 2012 at 1:10 pm

   I happened to catch the last recap almost immediately after it was posted so I just had to go back and see what all the comments were about. Wow, that was intense! I’m kind of glad I missed it.

   Dangerously-I’m an avid reader but a very sporadic commenter but I was very impressed with how you handled that situation. Even if I don’t comment much you’ll always have a reader in me. I was actually sad that you cut short the H-50 recaps this season and was actually worried that would mean no Masterchef recaps this summer! I was very glad to see you come back. Keep up the good work!

   Also props to all the smart and funny commenters who also handled a weird situation well. I’m late to the party, I know, but good job!

9. 9
   Sunshine
   Posted June 29, 2012 at 1:58 pm

   @8 – Unwise…weird situation is right….Dangerously good job….
   That whole thing was really awful and I think it might have scared away some posters….but hopefully they will return and feel free to snark and have fun like you do with your recaps without being torn to shreds and given hours of personal information about people that nobody here really needs to know.

   Rock on Unwise….you rule.

10. 10
    chaosbutterfly
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 2:17 pm

    I’m disappointed in the results, only because Tali really should have gone home. Since he has been in the competition, he has not cooked anything even close to decent. Everything has been nasty. He could not even place fruit on a plate properly. At least FE made something good at some point. Tali’s also not quite as entertaining of a douche as FE. By all rights, he should have been the one to go with his overly high self-esteem having ass. If his parents weren’t oversupportive, they had to have been super neglectful, causing him to compensate with misplaced confidence. If he does not go home next, there is no justice in this world.
    And thank you for the statement about FE needing a blow job, because it caused me to imagine his penis. That’s exactly what I needed in my life, an image of FE’s penis, so thanks a whole lot for that.

    Beautiful Rhinoceros gets on my nerves too. Good for him for getting out of a rough neighborhood, but lets be real here. He is so not about that life, so he was never in any real danger of being caught up in crime and such. What gang would be out there trying to recruit him? Nobody wants Eeyore along when you’re trying to rob a liquor store or do a drive-by or whatever gangbangers are into nowadays. He needs to drop the superior attitude stat.

    I feel bad for Tanya, because there has to be something wrong with her. If FE is your closest friend, there’s something wrong with you. Just look at Tali.

    I hope Christine goes super far. I don’t see her winning, but she’s amazing and not just because she’s a blind girl who can cook better than me. I kind of wish that she was faking her blindness though. Just so at the end, she could be like HA.

    Also, I don’t like Becky. There, I said it.

11. 11
    unwise
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 2:25 pm

    Thanks Sunshine! That was sweet. I’ll have to start commenting more often!

12. 12
    exhero
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 2:27 pm

    @chaosbutterfly – I don’t really care that much for Becky either. The seemingly constant griping about second place being an awful position is a bit tiresome.

13. 13
    MummyButterfly
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 2:32 pm

    @chaosbutterfly – I feel like the producers/editors are trying to make Becky “Whitney 2.0″. Unfortunately, Becky is missing that sweetness that Whitney had. She’s just a little to jaded for those of us who ADORE WHITNEY to hop on the Becky-Train.

    I am really glad that the further we go forward, the more I like DareDevil BECAUSE of her food and attitude, not “because she’s the blind chick”. She’d be my pony even if she could see.

14. 14
    Dangerously
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 2:59 pm

    Yeah, I’m honestly wondering about Becky as well. One minute I like her because she’s spunky and fun and the next second she’s either involved in some bullshit rivalry that FOX conjured up or moping because she didn’t win. I’m pretty pissed with Felix for being such a dipshit in the audition round. If she hadn’t been so annoying, I’d probably have picked her. She just struck me as a female Tebow (from s1), but that’s all faded away at this point.

    Regardless, I picked her as a pony, so I’ll ride her through the season.

    I like DareDevil (a lot), but I couldn’t pick her as a pony because I assumed they’d have another chopping competition, and was sure she wouldn’t have been able to keep up.

15. 15
    Pikey
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 4:43 pm

    I love me some DareDevil, as well as having a soft spot for Frank. I hope they both do well. Rumour has it (not a spoiler, I promise!!) that FE comes back next episode. I sure hope that it doesn’t happen – the manipulation on this show is so OTT.

    Love your recaps, Dangerously! The comment war on the last one was bizarre to say the least but it made for entertaining reading…

16. 16
    maryedith
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 10:01 pm

    That wasn’t a comment war. That was a comment therapy session.

17. 17
    Jimbob Jones
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 11:44 pm

    Old School AND Good Morning Vietnam references in the same recap… you are talented!

    I was actually pissed that FE went home, only because he seems to be able to cook circles around Tali (who has been useless pretty much since he started)

    I wonder, though — do they have recipe books handy for people? Because I really don’t think a bunch of random people would know how to make a chocolate lava cake. I wouldn’t even know where to start (and I probably cook well enough to make it into this group — I wouldn’t win. Daredevil and a few others would kick my ass. But I sure as hell cook better than Tali).

18. 18
    chaosbutterfly
    Posted June 30, 2012 at 6:07 am

    @JimBob, I wondered that too, because some of the stuff they ask them to do, I don’t know how to do either, and I’m a good cook.

    But I think most likely not, because pressure test dishes are technical, but they’re simple.
    Like molten lava cake…all it is is a decadent half-baked chocolate cake.
    Half of it is timing and the other half is making the cake mixture banging.

    Timing is hard if you’ve never made the cake before, but with some logic, you can figure it out. You know how long to cook a cake so that it’s properly done (fully baked, but still moist), then you just cut that time into quarters and only cook it between 1/2 and 3/4 of that time.

    And anyone competing on masterchef should be capable of whipping up a tasty chocolate cake batter from scratch. Part of being a good chef (not just a cook) is having tons and tons of recipes rattling around in your noggin.

19. 19
    Dangerously
    Posted June 30, 2012 at 6:34 am

    Also, @unwise, sorry about the H50 recaps. I really enjoyed writing them, but (for me, at least…can’t speak for my fellow, more talented, recappers) these things really take a bit of time, which I sadly just didn’t have any more. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to handle these recaps, either, but after a couple months of not writing I really started to miss it…and I figured I could squeeze in a couple ‘caps a week for the summer, at least.

    To me, it had to be FE that went home, just because his food was literally unpresentable. I know AAliens has been the weaker of the two all season (which works out well since now we don’t have to worry about either of them winning), but at least he was able to produce a cake.

20. 20
    unwise
    Posted June 30, 2012 at 8:39 am

    Thanks @Dangerously, I totally understand. I hope you took it as a compliment that I enjoy your writing and not a complaint.

21. 21
    Dangerously
    Posted June 30, 2012 at 8:41 am

    Hah, I definitely took it as a compliment. I read it as “you made Hawaii Five-0 actually worth watching,” which I take as high praise, indeed

    (Though, admittedly, I continued watching it…just because)

22. 22
    unwise
    Posted June 30, 2012 at 9:03 am

    Oh yeah you have to watch! It is good cheesy fun!! But you did make it that much better.

23. 23
    vallegirl
    Posted June 30, 2012 at 9:07 am

    Sheetal explained in one of her blogs that they given lessons in techniques and ingredients so they likely had a baking class around that time that focused on a molten lava cake. I’d guess that since they’d all been trained in making one recently they used it as the pressure test. The two who aren’t idiots managed to make the cake they were taught while the dumbasses didn’t pay attention in class then half-assed the pressure test and bottomed out.

    Plus, considering how many TC contestants run screaming from the idea of doing dessert because they normally get screwed out of the competition for making dessert, I wouldn’t assume home cooks are necessarily better prepared. It is funny that the dessert they made almost lost TC3 for Hung since Tom thinks molten lava cakes are “pedestrian.”

24. 24
    Chris Velazquez
    Posted June 30, 2012 at 10:56 am

    @Vallegirl, Tom thinks molten lava cakes are pedestrian? Well, TC has sucked for some time now, so Tom can go suck it. Molten lava cakes are sublime. Hell, I find no dessert to be pedestrian, but that’s just me.

    @Dangerously, Tali’s cake was actually undercooked. Yes, it held up, but you saw the goopy, splattery mess dripping from the spoon of one of the judges. That and no flavor should have kicked him the hell out, so it was FE’s big mistake that saved him. The fact that all of FE’s cakes collapsed meant he royally fucked up the measurements in his batter and no amount of baking was going to make that cake work.

    I believe in these challenges, the contestants are given a basic recipe and work their way around it, especially when it comes to desserts. I know I’ve sometimes seen a sheet of paper in the work stations.

25. 25
    vallegirl
    Posted June 30, 2012 at 12:50 pm

    I might have the wording wrong, but Hung, smartly, came to the finale with a basic molten lava cake recipe in the event he needed to make a dessert for his finale meal. He didn’t, but they did add a fourth dish at the last minute and Hung was the only one in the finale who made a dessert, and presented a legitimate four-course meal as opposed to a starter and three heavy entrees.

    That he executed it perfectly should have been enough to solidify his win, but the panel started questioning why he’d make something as common as a molten lava cake and dinged him for it, specifically because it wasn’t an exciting or on-trend dessert. It ended up not having an impact, but they did question why he’d do something so foolish. So they both want the chefs to make desserts but not if the dessert is too common, because they’d rather eat another lamb dish than a delicious chocolate dessert.

26. 26
    crankyguy
    Posted June 30, 2012 at 1:13 pm

    @vallegirl, that reminds me of the appetizers they had to make for some party on a big boat. Hung made some cucumber cup thingy I believe it was, and Daddy got onto him with “1965 called and they want their appetizer back.” I loved Hung for not taking any of his stupid shit with, “Look. If it was good in 1965, then it’s good now.”

27. 27
    michkabibbles
    Posted July 1, 2012 at 10:39 am

    @vallegirl-thanks for the behind the scenes info. my memory is like a colander, so while i can make a cake from scratch, i’d never be able to make one without a recipe. what you described kind of sounds like rupauls drag race-where all the contestants are given the song they’ll have to lip synch for their lives to, and they have time to practice, just in case they’re on the bottom two.

    i was a huge hung fan. i’d rather eat a dated cucumber cup than something with a lot of trendy foams or purees on them. i hate the stuff (are those even still trendy? i can’t keep up).

28. 28
    sarcasatire
    Posted July 1, 2012 at 10:54 am

    Why not…AAliens?

    Haha! Great recap, Dangerously!

29. 29
    MummyButterfly
    Posted July 1, 2012 at 11:12 am

    I’m not sure how many of ya’ll have seen this (haven’t seen it on any other comment thread), but Anna – the wife of the hubby/wife team – has a blog and she is posting each of the recipes as she makes them on TV. Interestingly, her Molten Lava Cake Recipe is up there as “Anna’s Molten Lava Cake”, but a quick glance shows that the bottom of the recipe says: *Recipe has been slightly modified from original version. Fox owns the exclusive rights. (http://braveapron.com/2012/06/25/annas-molten-lava-cake-approved-by-joe-bastianich/)

    Anna’s (and AJ’s) blog is: http://braveapron.com/

    ALSO interesting is that apparently she has a friendly relationship with FE (she even calls him “Flavor Elevator” on her blog when teasing him), and links to HIS blog (http://www.flavorelevator.com/). He returns the favor… I shall continue to investigate for all you peeps who have real lives and don’t have time to search for this stuff. AND if someone’s already got all this written down, and I’m just stupid – point me there, eh?

30. 30
    MummyButterfly
    Posted July 1, 2012 at 11:20 am

    Oh – FE also links to Scott’s blog: http://thecomfortabledish.com/ His (Scott’s) posts are more “bloggy” than “recipeish”, HOWEVER – they do NOT have the disclaimer that they are owned by FOX/Masterchef. Interesting…

    FE’s recap of his leaving the show is actually pretty cool. I appreciate that he doesn’t blame anyone but himself for the fact he isn’t a baker, and gives only good words to the rest of the contestants and judges. Fascinating….

31. 31
    sarcasatire
    Posted July 1, 2012 at 12:36 pm

    It’s amazing how assholes are always humble after they’re… humbled.

32. 32
    sheesh
    Posted July 1, 2012 at 12:45 pm

    Weeeeeerrrrrddddd@sarcastire.
    I always do hope that youthful cockiness (we’ve all been there) is tempered into a reasonable adult.
    It doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t shout “GET YA HEAD OUTTA YO ASS..SON!!”
    If we don’t tell them to get it straight then who will?