Mob Wives Chicago: Classy ’til the Bitter End

Renee takes a moment to share her screaming match with her ex with Giana.  Giana realizes that she’ll never fully know what actually happened when she was a child, but that Renee is just running off of her own anger instead of thinking rationally.  Giana feels sorry for her father and thinks he doesn’t deserve to be imprisoned for what he did.  Boy, if this is the moral ground on which you stand, I hope you fall in there.  I think she needs to ask the family of that old lady he butchered what they think he deserves.  Maybe looking at some of the crime scene photos will change her mind.  Renee reveals that she once loved Giana’s father and she doesn’t want to block him from her life.  She doesn’t want her to think it was all bad, because it wasn’t at first.  Yeah, up until he fled to Florida and murdered an old lady for her jewelry. 

What’s your problem?  It’s not like he mur…oh.

Nora’s attorney is filing a motion today, so she goes to be all intimidating by arriving in a chauffeured Towncar instead of her Ford Focus.  Her attorney meets her on the sidewalk, because he’s seen enough of her to know she’s nuckin’ futz.  I don’t blame you Mr. Attorney Guy – I wouldn’t sit alone in my office with her either.

These girls minus Nora are getting on a boat for relaxing time.  Apparently, Pia and Renee missed the fact that the “N” word does NOT refer to Nora.  Pia thinks it would be “insultive” for the others to bring up any ill feelings about Nora not being invited.  I think what’s most “insultive” is their constant misuse of English.

By the way, it really seems as though Nora is no longer a thought in Pia’s mind. 

Noranoranoranoranoranoranoranoranora.

In the other limo, Nora is again the topic of conversation.  Leah thinks the idea of exhuming her father’s body is like a Dr. Seuss book, but she would like to know the results.  Huh?  Nora gets all made up for the exhumation and takes yet another chauffeured car, which is good pre-planning since the previews show her getting arrested.  At least she won’t have to get her car out of impound.

She shows up to the cemetery which is swarming with cops.  The body has already been dug up when she arrives, which seems to be the constant issue when it comes to her dad’s corpse.  The cops pull the car over to detain her for investigation.  Geez, what a freakin’ clusterfuck.  It’s as though the cemetery and cops are all in on this reality TV show thing of making mountains out of molehills strictly for entertainment.

Hollywood cops.

The four friendly girls meet up on the boat and C-Wow is telling us how sweet and other-the-top nice Renee and Pia are acting, which tells me that this is going to get ugly fast.  Pia and Renee are always plastered, so when the waters get choppy they start flying all over the place.  Renee proves that she’s the drunkest by climbing up to the captain’s windshield and smashing her bare ass onto it.  Remember how at the beginning of the season, all we ever heard out of Renee’s mouth was about how classless people were?

Yep.