So, now we are back to Nora’s great body hunt. She and Renee are heading to the cemetery where Nora’s dad is supposedly buried. She tells us that the Feds confiscated his body to do their own autopsy – I wonder if they kept in a vault in Texas along with CousinSuckUp’s jewelry? They get to the cemetery and stand outside the locked gate. I suspect the Cemetery also refused to let them film there.
Damn, even the dead don’t want to deal with these bitches.
Since, Nora doesn’t know for sure if her dad is actually buried there – seriously, she should call Texas – she wants to “resume” his body. Before I can make a joke about it, Renee craps all over my punch line by correcting Nora in her one on one interview. Yes, Renee, we know she meant “exhume,” thanks for screwing up a perfectly good Teresa Guidice joke for me, bitch.
So, now Christina is doing a bit of soul searching. She is living a lie with her ex-husband. She is under financial strain which is a part of why she is living with her husband. And, now she is snatching stripper weave in fine dining establishments. She is stressed and needs a to talk to a counselor. Luckily, VH1 has no shortage of counselors willing to appear on television. Christina decides that she is willing to make up with Pia after all – apparently good friends snatch each other’s weaves out and still remain friends all the time. That’s just how the Chicago Mob Wives roll y’all.
I guess, I should make up with her. I mean, I did snatch her weave. That makes us even right?
Christina shares her revelations about therapy with Leah. Leah, has a Giudice moment and wonders why Christina would be talking about her personal problems with her chiropractor. Still not as funny as the “exhume” “resume” joke but I gotta make lemonade right?
Christina was all set to forgive Pia for being a skank, until she realized that Pia has un-friended her on Facebook! Not only that, but Nora has un-friended her as well. Now, they will never reconcile, because, Christina can’t see Pia’s status updates telling her when she is “at the club” or read those funny Memes about Neil Patrick Harris and Ryan Gosling. THE HORROR!
Hey Girl, stop pretending that you wouldn’t miss seeing this in your status updates.
Leah has now endeared me to her even further as she is sort of mortified to be having a conversation about Facebook on camera. She also thinks that Christina should be celebrating not having to deal with Nora’s constant status updates about her dad’s body and check-ins at the cemetery. Leah doesn’t like Nora because Nora was rude to her that one time at band camp – I mean that one time at a block party or something similar.
OMG, You guys, speaking of block parties. This is totally off topic, but I have to share it. So, this past Friday, my husband and I went to a block party that was really a birthday party for one of our friends/neighbors. So, we are hanging out and one of our neighbors introduces us to a couple of her female friends from out of town before heading on to mingle. My husband and I are talking to these girls (they just happened to be from Chicago), and I decide to go get us all some shots.
I get back and one of the girls is hanging all over my husband being all kinds of flirty. I wasn’t bothered by that mainly because my husband knows not to screw things up. So, I pass out the shots and my husband (keep in mind that we were introduced to these girls as PlathAddict and her Husband), puts his arm around me and says, “thanks babe.” Right before we are all about to toast. And, you know what that flirting skank had the nerve to say? She leans in towards my face and says that they (she and my husband) were having a private conversation and that I needed to back off.