Mob Wives Chicago Recap: Facebook Fail

Recaps

By PlathAddict | Tuesday, June 19, 2012 | 12:38 pm | 27 Comments
Tagged: , , ,
Posted in: Featured, Mob Wives Chicago, Recaps

So, now we are back to Nora’s great body hunt. She and Renee are heading to the cemetery where Nora’s dad is supposedly buried. She tells us that the Feds confiscated his body to do their own autopsy – I wonder if they kept in a vault in Texas along with CousinSuckUp’s jewelry? They get to the cemetery and stand outside the locked gate. I suspect the Cemetery also refused to let them film there.

Damn, even the dead don’t want to deal with these bitches.

 Since, Nora doesn’t know for sure if her dad is actually buried there – seriously, she should call Texas – she wants to “resume” his body. Before I can make a joke about it, Renee craps all over my punch line by correcting Nora in her one on one interview. Yes, Renee, we know she meant “exhume,” thanks for screwing up a perfectly good Teresa Guidice joke for me, bitch.

So, now Christina is doing a bit of soul searching. She is living a lie with her ex-husband. She is under financial strain which is a part of why she is living with her husband. And, now she is snatching stripper weave in fine dining establishments. She is stressed and needs a to talk to a counselor. Luckily, VH1 has no shortage of counselors willing to appear on television. Christina decides that she is willing to make up with Pia after all – apparently good friends snatch each other’s weaves out and still remain friends all the time. That’s just how the Chicago Mob Wives roll y’all.

I guess, I should make up with her. I mean, I did snatch her weave. That makes us even right?

Christina shares her revelations about therapy with Leah. Leah, has a Giudice moment and wonders why Christina would be talking about her personal problems with her chiropractor. Still not as funny as the “exhume” “resume” joke but I gotta make lemonade right?

Christina was all set to forgive Pia for being a skank, until she realized that Pia has un-friended her on Facebook! Not only that, but Nora has un-friended her as well. Now, they will never reconcile, because, Christina can’t see Pia’s status updates telling her when she is “at the club” or read those funny Memes about Neil Patrick Harris and Ryan Gosling. THE HORROR!

Hey Girl, stop pretending that you wouldn’t miss seeing this in your status updates.

Leah has now endeared me to her even further as she is sort of mortified to be having a conversation about Facebook on camera. She also thinks that Christina should be celebrating not having to deal with Nora’s constant status updates about her dad’s body and check-ins at the cemetery. Leah doesn’t like Nora because Nora was rude to her that one time at band camp – I mean that one time at a block party or something similar.

OMG, You guys, speaking of block parties. This is totally off topic, but I have to share it. So, this past Friday, my husband and I went to a block party that was really a birthday party for one of our friends/neighbors. So, we are hanging out and one of our neighbors introduces us to a couple of her female friends from out of town before heading on to mingle. My husband and I are talking to these girls (they just happened to be from Chicago), and I decide to go get us all some shots.

I get back and one of the girls is hanging all over my husband being all kinds of flirty. I wasn’t bothered by that mainly because my husband knows not to screw things up. So, I pass out the shots and my husband (keep in mind that we were introduced to these girls as PlathAddict and her Husband), puts his arm around me and says, “thanks babe.” Right before we are all about to toast. And, you know what that flirting skank had the nerve to say? She leans in towards my face and says that they (she and my husband) were having a private conversation and that I needed to back off.

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PlathAddict

If there were ever a situation where in which I had to choose between cheese and chocolate, cheese would win hands down. I spend my days writing blog posts for the multi-housing industry and my nights harshly judging people who appear on reality shows. If there is the odd weekend in which I am not working, or feeling smugly satisfied about my lack of my own reality show, I will build a blog for my friends. Then, I will spend the rest of my weekend conning other friends, family members, and general acquaintances to donate their talents to help out. I am shameless in my love of free stuff, blue humor, and great or even terrible fiction. I tell my friends that I watch reality shows to feel better about myself. In actuality, I watch them because I am vastly entertained by the things people will do to be famous. When Flipit asked me to join the TVGasm family, I was honored. When he said that I would be paid in Cheetos and M&M's, I was totally in.

27 Comments

  1. 1
    sheesh sheesh
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 11:03 am

    I can’t believe that bitch did that to you Plath.
    You should have pulled a wrench out of your purse and let her have it. What. A. Heffer.

    My ex-husband and I were out a bar once and this guy sent me a drink (don’t look at me? I was CLEARLY with my husband).
    My ex is no joke…6’5″ and built.
    He picked the drink up, tipped it to the guy, drained it, and gave the guy a stare.
    They left. Some days I have no idea what goes on in people’s heads I swear.

    I haven’t watched this epi yet. I am having a hard time getting names to faces on this show..not a good sign.

  2. 2
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 11:43 am

    @Plath, please give people a blood pressure warning when telling stories like that. My pressure went through the roof reading that. I don’t think you were even ghetto. I think you handle it just fine.

    Now had you snatched her weave and pushed her to the ground that would have been ghetto. (which is what Classy would have done.)

  3. 3
    PlathAddict PlathAddict
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 12:33 pm

    @sheesh, Hahaha! A wrench! I should start carrying one around just in case as a skank repellent.

    @classy, sorry I didn’t warn you. What was funny was after that incident and my husband finally stopped laughing, I had to text a friend of mine to find out if my behavior could be classified as ghetto. So far everyone I have asked that question has said that the “keep your ass moving” might straddle the line, but the execution of taking her drink back and drinking it before telling her to move it along was perfect.

  4. 4
    Del Williams
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 12:36 pm

    If we go by the edited version, Christina started it. It felt fake because there was no reason for the fight at all. Christina was mad because Pia and the other girl squashed their issues so fast. She wanted it to drag out, see some punches thrown. When that didn’t happen, she started it herself against Pia. It was a ratings move clearly. But then, none of the “princesses” are wrapped too tight.

  5. 5
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 12:51 pm

    Plathy, you are waaaaaaaaay classier than I would be. Bitch would have been wearing that shot.

    You husband is a sweetie too. You are good for each other.

    I am a transplanted Chicagoan and I just can’t watch these women trash the city I love. We. Are. Not. Like. That. Okay, they are everywhere, but most of us aren’t. And I so agree that a woman wanting to keep custody should keep better company.

  6. 6
    sheesh sheesh
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 12:52 pm

    I find the fact that you had to ask if your actions were “ghetto or not” is hilarious.

    Classy gets upset because she doesn’t deal well with dispespect.
    At all.

  7. 7
    thisbuggs4u
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 12:53 pm

    I can’t take this shit show…I forget that it is on, find it on a rerun and then can only get through 10 minutes before I have to turn it off…I totally think that Nora’s dad isn’t “dead”! I think that he is WPP and no one in her family wants to tell her that! Isn’t she the one that has no idea that her dad was MOB?!? Or is that someone else? I just know that she is CRAZY!!

    Oh, I have a crazy story for you, happened to me the other night..side note, I used to sign in with facebook-AlisonZimmerman- so you may know me, my pict would show up, so most of you know my age-32 don’t look a day over 20…pissed off 1 to many Delusonia pageant moms hence the new screenname….

    So I was walking back to the house from taking the garbage out to the curb. I see on of our neighbors. Give him a polite head nod and half a smile. He says to me, “hey, can I ask you a question?”. “Sure”, I say. He says to me,” so, you got any singe friends”. Yeah let me get right on that ass hole! I am thinking to myself as I am walking back to the house, Wow he must really like them young! Gross Gross Gross!! Can’t wait to tell MR Z that when he gets home!

  8. 8
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 12:58 pm

    Personally I am against alcohol abuse (spilling drinks, throwing them on people, etc), so I think taking the drink and drinking it was the right thing to do.

    @Sheesh that’s right. Classy don’t play that (in my Homey the Clown voice)

  9. 9
    sheesh sheesh
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 1:05 pm

    @Classy..sorry to go off topic, but we have no forums. Are you watching “Love and Hip-Hop, Atlanta” ?
    I need to get Rodel to put it on the DVR list.

  10. 10
    labowner
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 1:30 pm

    Plath sorry that happened to you. Maybe she is emulating Carol from RHONYC. Sheesh not all of us Midwesterners are heifers :)

    The best part of the whole show was with Leah’s dad telling her to stay out of it (Christina and Pia) since it doesn’t involve her. “Ah you just like the drama.” It’s odd common sense shows up in reality tv so I feel it must be highlighted.

    It’s not that I don’t want to like the show, I am getting tired of the same old same old fighting.

    Maybe Pia and Danielle can open an over the hill strip club.

  11. 11
    sheesh sheesh
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 2:52 pm

    @thisbuggs4u..I am trying to friend you on facebook I am friends with kthnxbai!

  12. 12
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 3:36 pm

    Classy, I am so with you about alcohol abuse. Even if I spill a drop, I call it a libation to the Great God Rah.

    Buggy & sheesh, I’m with Kthxy too, so would you friend me too? My pic is there and one of me and Michael, my guy/gay bestie. I prefer the furry one. Gasmii would give me more incentive to watch my FB.

  13. 13
    sarcasatire sarcasatire
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 4:35 pm

    yea, Christina totally started that fight. Pia was so confused because she and Nora had already hugged it out. Nora was like, “Yea, I called you a whore but i was probably drunk and talking shit.” Pia was like, “Cool.” They really didn’t want to beef with one another..but christina was itchin’ for a fight. If you’ll recall, she also called Nora’s dad a the forbidden word…hitman. But Nora didn’t rise to the bait. Then after Nora and Pia hugged it out, Christina was like, “No! nora, you called her a whore!” Pia told her to chill but Christina wouldn’t and they started arguing with Christina saying she was dragged into this because Pia told her about it. *scratches head* Anyway, Pia told her to build a wall and get the fuck over it but I guess Christina is paid by the blows because bitch earned her keep! First she threw a drink and then she lunged. That’s when shit got real.

  14. 14
    Chicken Lips
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 5:43 pm

    1. @PlathAddict – bitch needed to get to steppin’. And if that’s ghetto, when then I’ll join the ghetto army with you because you did what needed to be done.

    2. @thisbuggs4u – you are like in the Gasmii Relocation Program! Do you hang out in the same clubs as people in witness protection? Do you ever see Norah’s dad? P.S. I’m single and creeper neighbors are right up my alley! I’m 33 so maybe I’m too young for him though…

    3. Was it my imagination or was there an awful lot of disposible drinkware used in these people’s homes? Leah was using a plastic cup at what’s her face’s house and Renee was using a styrofoam cup for her coffee at home. What’s the deal? I thought these broads were classy? I mean, I used disposible everything at my house because I’m too lazy to do the dishes, but I never considered them classy.

    4. Thank you PlathAddict for recapping this – while this was on TV, I wasn’t paying incredibly close attention (contrary to my plastic drinkware pickup). I don’t know how much more I’ll be able to handle watching it and your recaps are much more entertaining.

  15. 15
    Yvonne
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 6:00 pm

    I heard that Nora’s dad is dead, she had already seen the body, but they decided to dig up her father anyway. Which is sick, especially if they did it just for a story line. Apparently her family is upset by that.

  16. 16
    Classy Drunk Classy Drunk
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 6:49 pm

    @ Sheesh…I am watching. It seems staged. There is a love triangle and the man left with the side piece in front of the main girl/baby mama.

    If you catch the repeat you will understand what I am saying about staged.

    I’ll probably keep watching just because it’s my city, but it might be too over the top…and that’s saying a lot because I like my shows with trashy women, sluts, and booze bags.

  17. 17
    sarcasatire sarcasatire
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 7:21 pm

    I read there will be a televised abortion on Love and Hip Hop Atlanta. If that is shown, and/or staged, then folks really fail at life.

  18. 18
    thisbuggs4u
    Posted June 20, 2012 at 8:04 pm

    Sheesh, you found me :)

    ChickenLips, that dude is totes weird! I have seen him many times. Our Condo Complex is pretty small. We live in the back, so I see him from time to time walking to the curb and what not. But I mean, really, way to make an impression. I finally said, no sorry, but My Hubby might know some single ladies, he isn’t due back for another month or so. He said to me, ” oh all the single navy ladies know where I live”. With that I just kept on walking!! I am thinking he maybe likes, fluffy white chicks…IDK though, it was all weird and kind of gross. Chicken, being 32 myself, I would say that maybe you aren’t :) heehehee!

  19. 19
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted June 21, 2012 at 4:35 am

    Can we get more Leah on the show?

  20. 20
    sheesh sheesh
    Posted June 21, 2012 at 6:41 am

    @labowner…heffer…heifer. hahahaha
    @ssc…I will admit I can be dumb…I can’t figure out which one of the 6 of us on Kkthnxbai you are.
    I could guess, but if it’s not you and the person doesn’t accept me as a friend …
    Rejection hurts like a bee sting.

  21. 21
    thisbuggs4u
    Posted June 21, 2012 at 12:41 pm

    Snow, I think I found you. I sent you a message and I FR’d you…

  22. 22
    hot cawfee
    Posted June 21, 2012 at 1:03 pm

    @Plathy– Good for you !!!!!!! Who did that drunken trollop think she was???? She got off easy with you drinking her shot!!!!

  23. 23
    hot cawfee
    Posted June 21, 2012 at 1:10 pm

    @19 Classy– I am with you– I love Leah

  24. 24
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted June 21, 2012 at 1:11 pm

    Sheesh, dumb? Never? Think Dairy Queen and you’ll find me.

  25. 25
    sheesh sheesh
    Posted June 21, 2012 at 1:31 pm

    OK…when I get home, I’m not supposed to be “playing on the computer” at work.
    Shhhhhhhhhhh!

  26. 26
    PlathAddict PlathAddict
    Posted June 21, 2012 at 5:16 pm

    Hahaha! I love that you guys tote hijacked the thread with Facebook. It’s just so meta! Also, thanks for the support with the whole “bitch overstepped her boundaries” topic. My husband thought it was hilarious that I snatched a drink out of her hand and even asked if I was going to beat a bitch down “Bad Girls” style. He knows that I don’t get jealous. I just make sure that bitches know their place. Because I’m classy like that. :)

  27. 27
    ocdme
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 9:43 am

    i also agree that mw chi is trying too hard to be the cool kids, but hopefully they’ll get as wrapped up in their own drama they’ll get it fixed. Leah seems hilarious, and my be the only reason to watch except i wish they’d subtitle her, so we can learn a new language and at least say it’s got educational value.

    Plath, i looked at picuture of pizzaria ( i’ll always see that now, thanks :) in her car, and it just looks like normal chicago gear: giagantic winter coat, super big purse, mittens and gloves, hat and scarf, plus spares since stuff gets lost….so in winter, we kinda have to be prepared and to awlla you non winter type people, looks like we’re haulin alota crap, ya know…..

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