Mob Wives Chicago Recap: Some Dads are Deadbeats, Some are Just Plain Dead

Recaps

By Sugarbush | Monday, July 30, 2012 | 8:44 am | 13 Comments
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Posted in: Mob Wives Chicago, Recaps

She can’t wait to cremate her father and bring him back to Florida so he can be where he always wanted – in the ocean.  I guess he’ll be sleepin’ wit da fishes, huh?  OW!

Giana and her friend go back to Renee’s to eat dinner.  Giana drops the bomb that she’s going to visit her father sans Mom, then her dog drops a bomb under the dining table.  Renee seems more upset about the turd than not being able to have it out with her ex in front of her daughter.

Renee’s upset that she can’t be there to protect her from her own father and his conniving ways, but she realizes that her daughter needs to know her father if she wants.  She is worried that she won’t be there to defend herself when her ex tries to turn Giana against her.

Leah and Pia meet up with Leah’s mom, Jacquie, because Pia’s mom is a breast cancer survivor.  I love this scene, because Leah and Jacqiue sound like me and my mom.  Jacquie tells Leah to stop using the f-word, so Leah looks at her and goes, “Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck.”  When Jacquie huffs and rolls her eye, Leah tells her to stop before she throws her through the window.  Jacquie responds with, “Oh please, don’t make me beat you.”  The whole time, they’re smiling.  I love it. 

Leah is wearing these grandfather clock pendulums on her ears.  I keep waiting for them to start tic-toc’ing.  Leah starts telling her mom and Pia that this whole thing makes her feel bad about the way she was when she was a teenager, but Mom tells her that mothers always forgive.  There’s almost tears, but Jacquie nips it in the bud. 

Pia invites Jacquie to meet with her mother and tells her that her mom grew up in the same neighborhood.  It seems that Pia’s and Leah’s moms were hoodlums in the day and ran with girlie gangs.  The two moms have tons of friends in common, so this should be cool.  Leah tells us with enthusiastic hand gestures that life is too short for all of this fighting and wants her friends to make like Rodney King and just get along.

Leah calls to invite Nora to the SGK walk and to make t-shirts at C-Wows.  When Leah tells her that Renee will be there as well, because she doesn’t want to leave anyone out (take note Bass-Mouth Heather from RHONY), Nora tells her that she won’t be going.  So, you’ll forego a charity walk to avoid someone you don’t like.  That’s cool.

Pia and Bella are nervous about the end of the pole days, because it’s brought in such good money.  She says she’ll explore other avenues, which means “I’ll go on a Vh1 reality show and get some good paychecks by making sure I introduce my level-headed daughter and act like a maniac”.

For Bella’s 16th birthday, she wants to go on a nice trip overseas.  But, because Pia will be hanging up her g-strings for hi-cut cotton briefs, they can’t go on such an expensive trip.

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Sugarbush
About

Hi, there!  About me...well, let's see.  I like to think of myself as an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, shrouded in a mystery.  Sometimes my personality doesn't even reconcile in my own head.  I'm a really caring and sensitive person, but I have a dark, dry, sarcastic sense of humor which tends gives the impression that I have no soul.  I am married to a great guy who shares my sense of humor and we have a son who, both fortunately and unfortunately, has his mother's personality.   I'm an independent contractor who works from home and keeps the kid all day, everyday.  I've loved to write my whole life and have big, never-to-be-achieved dreams of one day writing a book.  My favorite past time is laughing, which is what brought me to this site.  I can laugh at almost anything, so beware.

13 Comments

  1. 1
    featherhead
    Posted July 30, 2012 at 9:01 am

    That lawyer’s faces were priceless! You could see the wheels turning on how to get Nutbag Nora out of his office pronto! Did you catch Nora telling that other guy that she wants to see her father’s body and make sure he had an autopsy? OMG – there is really something wrong with her! And Pia hitching that Nora is going around saying that she was on the pole for 15 years and C-Woww goes – but you were! Bwwhaha!!

  2. 2
    labowner
    Posted July 30, 2012 at 11:51 am

    Wow that has to be difficult having a murderer for a father. Wonder why it landed him in federal prison as opposed to the state pen? What were the extenuating circumstances that made it a federal charge? Poor lady.

    Leah can you get any better?

  3. 3
    sheesh sheesh
    Posted July 31, 2012 at 6:31 am

    So in the previews Giana chooses to believe her father over Renee.
    Also Renee is in a nasty custody battle with her other daughter’s father.
    What kind of beast is Renee?
    I know she is awful. Sending a text via C-Wow’s phone (juvenile), but she must be really bad if her own daughter sides with her incarcerated father over Renee.

    Pia and Leah had moms that were in gangs? Were these gangs like the Pink Ladies from “Grease”?

  4. 4
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted July 31, 2012 at 12:51 pm

    I haven’t seen the episode yet. Did Leah give us a word of the day?

  5. 5
    Sugarbush Sugarbush
    Posted July 31, 2012 at 12:53 pm

    @Classy – No, unfortunately she spoke mostly English the entire episode, which means I learned nothing.

  6. 6
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted July 31, 2012 at 1:58 pm

    Dammit! I was watching this show partly for it’s educational value. Italian slang and the history of mobsters in Chicago. or at least that’s what I told my mom I watched it for so she didn’t judge me.

  7. 7
    Sugarbush Sugarbush
    Posted July 31, 2012 at 3:51 pm

    Ha! I’ve used a similar excuse so that people wouldn’t judge me for watching Jersey Shore.

  8. 8
    labowner
    Posted July 31, 2012 at 5:06 pm

    No Classy but she did want cancer to be a loud mouth down the street she could take a bat to it.

  9. 9
    fancyface
    Posted August 1, 2012 at 12:05 pm

    Ok I haven’t read the recap yet but I have a burning question….Am I the only one that pauses my dvr to read the letters or articles they show on tv? Because if I am, I’m slightly ashamed (but not really) that I do it, but it is very informative! Especially when they flash a newspaper article about what’s going on in the show. If it’s interesting, I always pause to get the title or publication so that I can look it up and read the whole thing online. Well this time? It paid off as proof that VH1 is full of shit & must think we are dumb.

    So there I was listening to Giana tell the story of what her dad did & I immediately want to look it up and get all the details because I’m nosy like that, so I paused the screen to read the article & I’m still laughing at that shit. The article is entitled ‘Robbery turns deadly’ (which should have been my 1st clue that it was fake) and this it what says verbatim..typos & misspellings included:

    “Who framed roger rabbit..this is the movie of the century not it actuuall wasn’t I am am justq Coming up with jiberish fro me tw worite todf make this look like an actuea newspapper fffgfgf
    oh you like how i added the indintation likeI am actually writing a newspaper article Writting this is a lot more boring thatn i espected it to bel thiin I am down low enough to just duplicate thisa “Bam there I go again wieth anothe indentation aand this time I even added quotation marks” now I am just going to writer the wokds I here…”

    WHAT. THE. FUCK?!? bwhahahahahha. Those assholes are idiots & I need to find the name of the intern who wrote that shit so I can send him a muffin basket because that shit is priceless. I seriously laughed for at least 15 mins straight after reading it. It said more shit I couldn’t see under the pause graphic on my screen but then it just repeats itself in the 2nd column, but SERIOUSLY? REALLY? Why even include the fake articles in the show if you can’t find real ones & did they seriously think no one would see that shit? There isn’t anything they can do to make this shit look authentic so why all the nonsense? I. Can’t!

  10. 10
    Sugarbush Sugarbush
    Posted August 1, 2012 at 12:15 pm

    @Fancyface – Nice catch! I actually thought about going back to the episode to see if I could pause that article, because I couldn’t find a damn thing online about her dad. I wanted to find the whole story, since she kinda’ glossed over it. Now I’m going to HAVE to go back to see what it says. That’s hilarious!

    And you’re right. I’m finding that Nora is basically the only one who’s legit on this show, which must explain her insanity. I still love me some Leah, but the rest seem to be wannabes. Although, maybe we should look up those gangs that Leah’s and Pia’s moms were in. Maybe THEY are the mob connection here.

  11. 11
    labowner
    Posted August 1, 2012 at 3:31 pm

    http://www.sptimes.com/News/102800/Pasco/Jury_says_Carcione_gu.shtml

    Here is an article about the murder. Interstate commerce is why it was federal. Really, they had to kill a 78-year old lady?

  12. 12
    fancyface
    Posted August 1, 2012 at 4:05 pm

    @labowner….thanks for the link! Now, I’m confused, is her dad the Carcione person the article is about or the Volpe character? Because she said her dad owned the bakery & the article is saying the guy that ratted him out, Volpe, owned it. I do seem to recall her saying her ex was a dirty rat so I’m assuming he’s Volpe

  13. 13
    labowner
    Posted August 1, 2012 at 4:09 pm

    Giana’s last name is Volpe so I am going to assume that is the dad.

    Shoved flowers down her throat and wrapped her head in duct tape? WTF is wrong with some people.

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