Mob Wives Recap: Thongs and Fire


By PlathAddict | | 12:10 pm | 23 Comments

Anyway, Drita thinks that they should warn Carla that the guy is obviously insane. Love has no problem with that but says that if Carla antagonizes her she has no problem getting physical. And when we consider the hair pulling fight Carla had with Renee regarding issues with her last boyfriend, I suspect that Carla won’t have a problem getting physical either.

Renee, having exhausted her drag queen support group, and still being screened by everyone except CousinSuckUp, is ready to make a big statement about Junior being out of her life for good. She has found a new house and now is getting rid of any memories of him. She cuts him out of her photos and then puts everything in a trash can and sets it on fire. She tells CousinSuckUp that all she needed from him was AJ and now he can just get gone. I don’t care what CousinSuckUp has to say in response.

Drita sits with Aleeya and discusses what they can and can’t wear when they go to visit Lee in jail. Basically, she can’t wear anything summery (strappy tops, bare shoulders, etc.) and should probably wear overalls and flannel in order to get past the gate. Drita does seem very nervous about this visit, but she can’t dampen Aleeya’s excitement about seeing her dad. She confirms that she does still care a lot about Lee. So, things are very complicated for her. Please don’t take him back, Drita!

Karen and CousinSuckUp meet up at the car wash. Is the car wash a new favorite hangout now? Karen tells CousinSuckUp about Dave having a girlfriend and Karina finding a thong in her bedroom. CousinSuckUp talks some trash about Motel 6 and Ritz Carlton and how Karen should give them a bill for using her house to do their business. If ever there were a bitch who knew all about the ins and outs of the Motel 6 and their daily rates, it’s CousinSuckUp. You know, since her jewelry is in Texas and she is about to be kicked out of her house for not paying rent.

Karen says that they had always been open about when they were seeing someone else and she wonders why Dave would keep this a secret. Of course, she is convinced that this is all about her and that he is intentionally trying to rile her up by not telling her about having a girlfriend. She seems much more angry about him having a girlfriend than Karina finding said girlfriend’s thong in her bedroom. Which, is to be expected. This is Karen after all.

So, now Renee and Poor AJ are in their new home. Renee is telling him that she has decided to go to a rehab facility in Florida. AJ isn’t sure at first but comes around saying that he knows she has been through hell and this is something that she needs to do for herself. He also confirms that he is on her side. Which is what she needs to hear. It’s why she’s been stalking her friends with this drama in the first place. She needs to hear them repeatedly tell her that they are on her side. Even when the other side is just some paranoia induced enemy created by her drug addled brain.

PlathAddict

If there were ever a situation where in which I had to choose between cheese and chocolate, cheese would win hands down. I spend my days writing blog posts for the multi-housing industry and my nights harshly judging people who appear on reality shows. If there is the odd weekend in which I am not working, or feeling smugly satisfied about my lack of my own reality show, I will build a blog for my friends. Then, I will spend the rest of my weekend conning other friends, family members, and general acquaintances to donate their talents to help out. I am shameless in my love of free stuff, blue humor, and great or even terrible fiction. I tell my friends that I watch reality shows to feel better about myself. In actuality, I watch them because I am vastly entertained by the things people will do to be famous. When Flipit asked me to join the TVGasm family, I was honored. When he said that I would be paid in Cheetos and M&M's, I was totally in.

23 Comments

  1. 1
    perfxcked
    Posted January 22, 2013 at 12:59 pm

    I was really stunned by how lovely and young Renee looked in the burning wedding pictures!

  2. 2
    KeKe
    Posted January 22, 2013 at 1:05 pm

    Great recap! I love Renee also, but she is working my nerves and it’s only the 3rd episode. She has crammed a season worth of her antics into 3 episodes.
    Karen, ugh, is delusional. I don’t think Dave wants her back, that’s some shit she made up. I said the same thing about her being more upset about them using the house instead of some skank’s dirty underwear in her daughter’s room.
    I hope Drita doesn’t take Lee back, but I love the relationship she has with her kids.
    CSU, just please go away.
    Big Ang, love her.

  3. 3
    featherhead
    Posted January 22, 2013 at 1:55 pm

    Renee looked beautiful in her wedding pictures but why is there a sunny side up egg on her vail? Can you blame Junior for keeping her doped up? I give him a pass at that one.

    PA – you are not being too hard on Renee, I’m getting tired of her nonsense too.

    Yeah Karen, go head and fly to AZ. Then what? She and CSU talk soo tough and then do Nothing. Bust a cap ….. BWHAHAHA!

  4. 4
    Posted January 22, 2013 at 2:19 pm

    @perfxcked, Renee used to be stunning! I still see a lot of the raw materials when I watch her on television. I think it’s just been a hard life of dealing with her ex, her dad’s stints in and out of prison, and plastic surgery. Plus, who knows how long she has truly been abusing legal and illegal substances?

    @KeKe Right?! We haven’t even had a physical altercation between any of the women yet, and already she is overdoing it with the drama. Oh, how I long for that hair pulling fight she had with Carla. Cussing and screaming, Drita taking off her shoes, Renee crying out over and over again, “my SON, Carla! My Son!” that was GLORIOUS in terms of drama. This is just a sad broken down version of the former splendor that was once DragQueenRenee. I truly hope things pick up with the rehab storyline.

    @featherhead, THANK YOU! I’m going to tell my husband he is wrong. He will try to pull that whole, “why? because the internet says so,” argument that he always tries to pull when not suitably liquored up, but then I will be able to point to you and say, “NO, it’s because featherhead says so. Now, make yourself useful and pour me a drink! Also, where is my chicken pot pie, bitch?!” He loves it when I talk to him that way, says it keeps him on his toes. I’ve offered to slap him on the ass and order him to “bring me a sammich,” but for some reason, he thinks that is going too far.

  5. 5
    featherhead
    Posted January 22, 2013 at 2:33 pm

    @PA – love it! Now tell that mofo to knock it off or we’ll put his ass in the trunk and then we’ll bust a cap together!!!

  6. 6
    Posted January 22, 2013 at 2:38 pm

    @featherhead, HAHAHA! Not before we threaten his whole family, right? Love it!

  7. 7
    JulieSF
    Posted January 22, 2013 at 2:47 pm

    \guess the reaction from CousinSuckUp wasn’t strong enough, so Renee seeks out her fellow drag queens in a support group.\

    Lmao, so wrong! Great recap as always, PA.

    I have to say I am beyond irritated with Renee…to the point where I can’t even remember why I liked her in the first place. I didn’t like how from the beginning of this series she decided that Carla was enemy number 1. Hasn’t she said Carla is one of her oldest friends, spanning over twenty years? This whole bs about her hooking up with married men and flirting with some guy at a party. Isn’t that something you discuss in private with one of your oldest friends or, at least, give them the benefit of the doubt? This is why I can’t feel any sympathy for Renee because she’s willing to go so far for manufactured drama and I’m positive her sister is involved in this storyline too. And the fact that she can’t take any responsibility for her actions. So now her drug problem was because Jooonyaaa was over-medicating her? Really? I’m glad you listed those crazy moments of hysteria when Junior was no where to be seen, PA. Ugh, I just despise this bitch right now. The only way she can win me back is if she decides to devote her life to the poor…or kicks CSU’s ass in a drunken rage, either one.

    As for Karen, she must not have any friends because she left the house in that ass-widening muumuu. Agree, her ex is a scumbag. IMO, someone who manages to forget their thong is unsavory to say the least. I really hope Karina turns out ok because she’s got a couple of low-lifes for parents. Oh, and her tract house is not the \Ritz-Carlton of Arizona\. CSU is so full of shit. She’s never see the inside of a Ritz-Carlton and all of her talk of Dubai luxury and servants and 200k in jewelry is all bullshit. It would be one thing if she was a simple thug like Love but a bragging, lying thug? The worst! Lol.

    As for Love, I agree, she sees a storyline with having beef with Carla. I hate to see Carla bullied like this. This is one of those instances where Big Ang could actually stand up for someone, especially when she hearl renee straight up lie at the botox party.

  8. 8
    Posted January 22, 2013 at 3:16 pm

    @JulieSF, TOTALLY agree with you! I think that Carla is just tired of being the sacrifice for Renee every season. It’s like Renee knows that because they have been friends for so long, Carla will just keep taking a hit for the team. I would be totally sick of it and it looks like Carla is too. I also agree that a large amount of this drama is probably being stirred up off camera by Jennifer G. Since the Chicago Mob Wives was a bust, Jennifer is probably going back to what she knows best. The only problem is that she is over doing it. She has to know that Renee will bring the drama and is now just going all out with exploiting that. Seriously, we are only on the third episode and she is going to rehab? WTF?!
    As for CSU, she is now blogging for VH1 about Mob Wives. As though any of us care to hear her thoughts about anything, let alone a show that proves her irrelevance. When it comes to Love and Carla, Love is definitely sniffing out story lines. But, one thing I have learned over the past couple of seasons is that Carla simply does not allow bullying. It took a while for me to warm up to her, but I have noticed that she is always willing to stand up for herself. I just hate that Renee is trying to get everyone else to go after her. But, I LOVE that Carla isn’t having it.

  9. 9
    labowner
    Posted January 22, 2013 at 5:13 pm

    Okay – I am going to ignore Renee and agree to disagree Plath. I understand the frustration, but we have zero idea what it is like to live that life and obviously have an unfucking caring sister who manipulates you to make money. I don’t quite get that family dynamic.

    I loved seeing Love make Drita flinch. Liked that her mom didn’t want a pregnant teenager, but a felon for an older daughter is okay.

    Drita – stop with the arm work. Soon you are going to look like Madonna and that is not pretty.

    Is Carla’s only story line to be Renee’s punching bag or she is purposely being unavailable for filming?

  10. 10
    hot cawfee
    Posted January 23, 2013 at 7:51 am

    I love Renee but yes–she has been a real annoyance these weeks. Its the incessant \Where is my man to protect me/make it all better\ that tries me. Sadly AJ will be stepping into the MAN role for her when she gets out of rehab–the decision maker, get the box from the high shelf, that man insulted me—He should go away (far away) to a good college and get something going for himself.
    Did Junior over-medicate her?? Could be but she didnt have to take every pill he offered. And wash it down with a glass of wine. Does she seek Junior’s approval that much????????? It could be any man and every man. I am guessing she went from her father’s home to a marriage where her husband was more a patriarchal husband than a marital husband.—Does that make sense??????

    Love is growing on me but she scares me. Love the necklace btw–and he Mom could be some fun this season.

    Karen– go to AZ or where ever and Kick Dave’s ass— how dare he have any girl in your (your daughter’s and HIS) daughter’s bed room—–not cool and so disgusting.

    Cousin Suck Up is still here???— and getting blow outs nonethe less– I should try to tell Visa that one month–sorry cant pay you b/c I need to get my hair done–and next month looks no better for ya’ but I shall look FABU!!!!!!!1

    Drita– please dont let your story become the little pot stirrer–please—I want to see your new business thrive and you move on from Lee.

    Carla–meh—I guess Joe and the new chick are going to be her story line.

    Big Ang–YAY too– love her. And I think if anyone would confront Renee on her drug and alcohol issues it would be Ang. Big Ang can say it with love and caring and not in a critical way.

  11. 11
    featherhead
    Posted January 23, 2013 at 8:00 am

    I forgot to mention – Karen looked like a beached whale in that mumu during the chat with her daughter. She has gotten huge!! And her face looked all kinds of f-ed up in her talking (or tawking) heads. Her lips and face looked hella lumpy. Why didn’t she mention her “spa” to the financial planner? Hmmmm? (Good catch Plath!)

    My Dad really pissed me off a few years ago (still mad) when he told me that during his Navy days there was a guy that offered him a job when they got out of the Navy. He turned it down – I screamed “What the hell is wrong with you? I could have been a Mafia Princess!!!!” Wait till he sees the nursing home I’ve picked out for him….

  12. 12
    Classy Drunk Classy Drunk
    Posted January 23, 2013 at 8:23 am

    At least the girls turned down the boobs this year because in the talking heads it was ALL boobs. Too much cleave for my taste.

  13. 13
    JulieSF
    Posted January 23, 2013 at 1:41 pm

    Lmao featherhead could have been on Mob Wives! I hate myself for doing this and I’m not exactly a supermodel but I laughed so hard when I saw Karen in her mumu. Every season she gets bigger! She said she was glad Karina was so into volleyball because it keeps her from getting involved with rogues and hooligans like Karen in her youth but I think she’s also grateful for the fact that her daughter is physically active. She also disappoints me more and more as a mother every season. There’s no way I would leave my child with someone like her ex who wasn’t even involved in her upbringing for years. The woman has bad judgement.

    I was watching a documentary on her father Sammy the Bull and hubba hubba, he was handsome but WHAT. A. RAT. He was probably the biggest snitch in mafia history. And then he went to Arizona and screwed up big time with his ecstacy ring which all three of his kids were involved in. Karen has, by far, the closest and most interesting relationship with the mob but the apple don’t fall far from the tree, that’s for sure.

  14. 14
    Mylia Saa
    Posted January 23, 2013 at 3:29 pm

    I think something is going to happen this season because I remember on twitter big ang posted pics of her drita and carla hanging out somewhere and drita took pictures of her wearing boots. Then she left with one boot off. Then the same night Love posted a picture of her fist on her twitter saying \broke two noses\ and the next day tweeted \ #carlacomeoutandplay but jennifer replied saying stop. It’s interesting that my theory is maybe Love gets into it with drita and carla this season.

  15. 15
    Posted January 23, 2013 at 3:40 pm

    @labowner, I have always used Renee’s background as an excuse for a large amount of her behavior – plus it was always fun to watch her when she just let her hair down and let it all go. It’s a large reason of why I have always been on her team while also calling her out on her own bad behavior. But, the thing is, I think she should be accountable for her own decisions when it comes to where she is now. Yes, her sister is EVIL for allowing this to play out on camera.
    But, I always come back to the fact that Renee DOES have a choice in this. Renee said at last year’s reunion that Jennifer wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to air all of the stuff happening between the surgery and Junior, but that SHE wanted Jennifer to air it. And, when I look at the fact that they were raised in the same household and Jennifer is producing a popular TV show, while Renee is crawling around on all fours screaming about crumbs, I have to accept that Renee needs to accept some responsibility for her choices. It’s why I hope that she starts to pull it together after her stint in rehab.

    @hot cawfee, I know right? Renee once said that she wanted AJ to follow in her father’s footsteps and then reconsidered. But, I think even she didn’t realize what she meant at the time. This was a woman who with a 17 year-old-son, was still relying on her father to tell her who she could be friends with. She was also told by Junior that no one else would have her so they might as well get married. So, she definitely will rely on AJ as the man, to tell her what to do and that makes me hurt for him and her. As for that BS with Karen and Dave? That just pisses me off. Not only does Karina not deserve to be suggested to her father’s skanks, she doesn’t deserve her mother having her act as a go between on national television.

    @featherhead, HAHAHA! A Mafia Princess! And yes, Karen keeps packing on the pounds. Too bad she turned on Carla, because Carla was totally willing to help her get in shape.

    @Classy, OMG the boobs! Just put those things away before someone gets hurt.

    @JulieSF, I don’t get what Karen is doing as far as having Dave living with Karina either. It’s not that she doesn’t know what he is about. Her choice to leave her daughter in AZ to film a reality show was the first time I gave her the side eye. But, she just keeps making such awful choices as a parent, that I have built an imaginary place where kids like Karina and AJ are happy and have parents who actually support them and their needs without relying on them to act as grown ups because said parents are too self absorbed to take care of them.

  16. 16
    Chicken Lips
    Posted January 23, 2013 at 5:29 pm

    Thank you for explaining the part about the letter – I didn’t think it was threatening in anyway, but I thought maybe I missed a key point and I was just too lazy to hit rewind on the remote control.

    I too have grown incredibly tired of Renee’s shenanigans. I understand she’s had a tough life and that she is incredibly dependent on anyone that walks past her, but blaming Junior for overmedicating her actually made me go “Whiskey, Tango, Foxtrot?!” How is this Junior’s fault? She was seemingly high as a kite before Junior came back, before her surgery and after Junior left. If Junior was giving her more than the dosage without her knowing, wouldn’t she have gone back to the regular dosage and come down from the clouds after he left? I’m not buying it – she knew what she was doing but doesn’t want to admit it to a room full of drag queens she doesn’t even know.

  17. 17
    JennBug
    Posted January 23, 2013 at 6:46 pm

    I never disliked Renee, but (and, I know this was last episode) the way she ran to Love & said “Carla isn’t coming because she has a problem w/ you” ……really?? I never got that from the phone convo…….and before that, the way she snuck in trying to snoop….again, I know this is the wrong episode to complain, but the drugs, or something is definitely making her crazy. Although the crumb incident?! I think Renee has more issues than the drugs/Junior can account for.

  18. 18
    featherhead
    Posted January 24, 2013 at 6:15 am

    I would love to know how Junior would know that Renee is badmouthing him to his son? None of them should be able to have contact with Junior if he is in witness protection. Sounds fishy to me.

    Karen’s daughter lives with Karen’s mother in AZ (at least that’s what I remember Karen saying). So she doesn’t live with Dave who is living in Karen’s mansion (haha) rent free by himself . I wonder if either of these loser’s pay Mrs. Sammy da Bull child support?

  19. 19
    Posted January 24, 2013 at 3:20 pm

    @featherhead, I remember that in the first season Karina was living with her grandmother and uncle. But, in the second season when Dave got out of prison, Karen told him that it was his turn and set him up at her house so Karina could live with her dad at her house.

    I’m sure the grandmother is a huge presence because hopefully, even Karen wouldn’t leave her daughter’s care to a recently released unemployed ex-con without supervision – even if he is her dad. It would be way too much responsibility for someone who hadn’t even been to a grocery store in a few years.

  20. 20
    featherhead
    Posted January 24, 2013 at 3:51 pm

    @PA – We’re talking about Karen..

  21. 21
    Posted January 25, 2013 at 5:47 am

    Hahaha! Yep, you’re right.

  22. 22
    Aunt Dorsey
    Posted January 25, 2013 at 7:30 pm

    My stars and garters, thanks for the recap. I haven’t watched since the first season. Doesn’t sound like much has changed. I did like Big Ang, and caught her show but I thought the rest of them were pretty redunkulous and quit watching. All the DRAMMMmmer.

  23. 23
    Derek Hazelton
    Posted January 29, 2013 at 12:02 am

    Is the go-to storyline to keep Carla on the cast that she “trashes (insert name here) all over town?” Because, along with that phony financial planner, Carla’s storyline seems like a load of bullshit to me.

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