Newsroom Recap: They Know About Generators, Right?

Hello again. The end is in sight and now that I’ve accepted that these bloated, dated and utterly corny credits are perfect for The Newsroom I don’t hate them as much. At least now I know to expect a cutting edge NBC drama from 1987. And I wonder if Sorkin’s rethinking that whole sweat shop mentality to the writers room now that the show’s been roundly panned. Steal the glory, shoulder the blame.

These credits suck.

Regardless, the episode begins and some raspy-voiced guy is talking about a bunch of guys pitching some story for a year and it’s a story to interview Will? On what planet does anyone, let alone 12 anyones, give a rat’s ass about a cable news anchor that they’ll keep pitching HIM a story if he isn’t selling something? Clearly on Planet Sorkin where “print” journalists have loose ethics but broadcast is so very noble.

Will’s also rooting around in his desk because his auto-pilot really is set to “dick.” Oh, he’s looking for a cigarette. To smoke. In the office. Because he’s just that old school. Reporter guy wants to know why Will’s doing this now and Will makes a hilarious Camelot comparison and I wonder if he thinks he’s Kennedy, Arthur, or just a cuckold. Kennedy. Definitely Kennedy, even if he is Republican.

Sorry, I seem to have misplaced all the fucks I give.

Reporter guy, Brian, was asking why him and why now? Because he’s the best at covering the media, despite recent setbacks. Then Will lays down ridiculous restrictions where Brian would basically be a stenographer who gets to watch the great and powerful Will do his work. Brian balks so Sorkin Will points out that he went from being on the masthead at Newsweek to writing a blog. Oh for fuck’s sake. I pointed to Matt Taibbi and Jeremy Scahill in the minicap, but you know who else writes “blogs?” Josh Marshall, Nate Silver, Ezra Klein, EJ Dionne, Paul Krugman, Ta-Nehisi Coates, Andrew Sullivan…and those are off the top of my head. Plus, Pro Publica and SCOTUSblog are online news sources.  In a 24-hour newscycle blogs are often the first to break stories, so get off your high horse, Aaron.

Will keeps dangling that carrot in Brian’s face. Every major magazine wanted to do a cover story on Will (Why?) but he wants Brian and New York magazine. Brian wants to know what effect their “history” will have. Will barfs up a load about their professional history but Brian’s more interested in their personal history. Will tells him exactly how to disclose Brian’s past relationship with Mackenzie and something about the email. (Seriously, who gives a shit? That WAS A YEAR AGO.) Then he tells Brian to hang around and learn about their “philosophy” (Sit around. Act like assholes. Wait for someone to call an entire story in. Broadcast.) but Will has to meet with Reese to discuss abandoning their principles. You guys scooped the President. You have no principles.

I said dance little monkey. DANCE!