Nurse Jackie Recap: Bag Open, Cat Out

Then Cruz informs the nurses to shut it regarding the gurney incident, and no one except Zoey gives a rat’s ass. She starts prattling about the importance of truth, and Thor tells her to go give Lenny some truth. So she does.

“So listen, Larry…Lance…what’s your name again? It’s not in my notes.”

She drags him to the chapel and reads out some horrible break up lines from her notebook, and when that all goes to hell, she just hands him her ring. Poor Lenny can only sit there and hope Zales gives refunds.

Jackie’s been in and out all day, and missed the whole gurney incident, so when she’s tending to Dave she accidentally pisses him off by not acknowledging he was dropped. Dave is mild-mannered, but he can tell he’s getting the runaround, and is starting to resent everyone blowing off their hand (or lack thereof, really) in his injuries. Akalitus drags her away and starts to explain, but Cruz jumps in and tells them to stop talking about it.

Of course no one is watching Dick, and he wanders over and lays a wonderful, heartfelt apology right on Dave. That’s all Dave really wanted. As this this going on, Dick’s daughter arrives and thanks Akalitus for watching her demented father. When Cruz hears this, he doesn’t even know what to do. He runs over and tries to do some damage control before Dick gets them all sued, but Dave flat out tells Cruz that Dick is the only one with brains enough to apologize, and he could have sued them. It’s unspoken that he would have been more likely to sue if they kept to Cruz’s asshole regimen, but I think he got the point.

It wouldn’t be Season 4 without some fetus stalking, so it’s a good thing we still have Coop! He’s bought some baby carriers now, in two different colors. O’Hara tells him he doesn’t want a partner, and Coop stresses that he only wants to be part of the baby’s life, and help where he can. O’Hara finally breaks. She keeps the blue Snuglie.

Akalitus walks Dick out, and he tells her to keep on keeping on, and she’ll get a promotion in no time. This hurts–not because Akalitus just got demoted, but because she’s watching a very good friend deteriorate, and he has no idea. He thinks he’s coming back to work the next day, and all she can do is play along.

Jackie’s been a bit sidetracked, what with the Vicodin smoothie and Dick’s wacky ass running around, but she manages to squeeze in a moment and ask Cruz for a reference. He tells her he barely knows her and has no information in her file, but he understands divorce and custody battles, and agrees to do it. He says she’s a good nurse, and will base his reference on that. He himself went for sole custody and got it, and we all know that’s going swimmingly.

Speaking of Cruz’s custody, Charlie starts blowing up Jackie’s phone. She tells him she can’t have him in her life, and he agrees, but first her needs her to bail him out of jail.

See, that Cruz custody thing worked out fine!

Jackie insists he text his father and tell him about the arrest. He’s too fucked up to operate his phone, so she texts Charlie’s dad that he’s been arrested but is safe, and is being taken home by one of his friends from rehab. Oh shit, this might turn bad. She hits send, unaware that she just texted her boss.

She gets Charlie home, and damn, Cruz! Obstetrics must pay out the craphole, because that foyer alone could hold my townhouse. She gets Charlie settled on the couch and says she’ll stay until his dad gets there. Oh no…

Are you wearing shoes on these floors? I told you, no shoes on these floors!

Sure enough, in walks Cruz. And that’s the cat, folks, right out of the damn bag.

Next week, Cruz is on the rampage, drug testing and pulling surveillance tapes and firing people left and right. And in the middle of everything is Charlie, asking Cruz not to fire Jackie. Well, that certainly is the fixings for some drama! Join me then to find out how much worse things can get!