Nurse Jackie Recap: Shorthanded

After the somewhat overwhelming fallout from Charlie’s overdose, namely Jackie’s outing as an addict and the resulting termination of Eddie and Akalitus, this episode finds Jackie in a sort of professional limbo, trying to simultaneously suck up to Cruz and make amends to the people affected by this. This I guess she thinks will be accomplished by inviting Eddie and Akalitus to breakfast with her and a kimonoed Zoey.

Jackie is mired in guilt over all the unemployment, but Akalitus points out that she already considered her job lost when Cruz showed up and made her redundant. As for Eddie, he just wants to move on with life, and maybe get a dog. Akalitus yearns for the days of simple nursing, devoid of nitpicky forms and paperwork, and doesn’t appreciate Zoey pointing out that Akalitus is the one who made them fill out quadruple copies of said forms. The truth hurts, but so does Akalitus’ eff you face.

Jackie still feels bad that Akalitus trashed the urine sample to save Jackie’s job, but that’s just Akalitus’s cue to remind Jackie not to render that gesture moot by getting herself fired after the fact. Fiona interrupts the grown-up talk to informing them that Grace is on strike, I guess from school, or maybe life. Jackie finds her still in bed, surfing the Internet in her pjs, and they have an attitude-laced spat about Grace’s yearning to attend public school. “You don’t know what it’s like to have to go to a place you hate, EVERY DAY,” says the poor, put-upon tween. No, Grace, how would any adult POSSIBLY understand the depth and breadth of your completely new, complex, and unique needs? NO ONE HAS EVER HAD THESE THOUGHTS BEFORE YOUR BRAIN CREATED THEM.

Jackie contradicts that nonsense immediately, and tells Grace to quit acting like a special snowflake and come have waffles with her sad friends. Sounds like just the thing to perk up an angsty kid!

Zoey has put out a collection jar for Eddie and Akalitus in the All Saints nurses’ station, which Jackie promptly stuffs with cash. Everyone is wearing armbands to commemorate the loss, but Sam and Thor are confused about the firings, and wonder if Cruz is cleaning house. Jackie tells them to leave it alone, right before Cruz walks by to the soundtrack of Zoey’a spooky ghost noises.

I love how Zoey’s so petrified of doctors, yet has no trouble getting fresh with Cruz.

This doesn’t go over. He orders them to get rid of the fundraising jar, knock off the foolishness, and lose the armbands, because he’s meeting with some Quantum Bay suits that day, and he wants to report that things look at least somewhat normal. This is surely a bit of foreshadowing, so expect things to devolve into chaos momentarily.

Zoey and Thor want to keep their armbands on, but Jackie begs them to comply–she can’t handle anyone losing else on Cruz’s warpath. Coop shows up then and starts cackling at the collection jar, but it’s only because he doesn’t get it–he hasn’t heard about the firings. Jackie takes him aside to break the news, and Coop is so dorkily clueless. He agrees to keep calm and carry on, but immediately contradicts himself by regressing to his old stress-related tit grab. Jackie is beyond unfazed by him at this point, and she just removes his hand and walks away.

Considering she let Eddie at them on a regular basis, this probably doesn’t seem so bad.

I guess Lenny has already left for Greece, because some unfamiliar EMTs bring in an unconscious dude, and both are cranky because the dude woke up, cussed them, and threw some punches. Cruz wants to know why he’s the only doctor on the floor (guess he hasn’t run into Coop yet), and Jackie snidely asks if he’s fired anyone else. No, but it’s early, Cruz answers. Jackie has a temporary safety net, but I wonder how far she can go with the sass before Cruz reneges on his promise.

Jackie starts ripping off the patient’s pants so she can get a catheter going, and Cruz orders her to get the BP and heart rate first. So I guess she’s trying to compensate for getting everyone else to behave, because Jackie cops an instant attitude and just starts ripping the guy’s goosedown jacket, sending feathers all over the room. I’m pretty sure I find this funnier than Cruz does.

Dude has no sense of humor.