Once Upon a Time Recap: A Giant Waste of an Episode

Recaps

By PottyMouth | Thursday, February 14, 2013 | 2:46 pm | 21 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Once Upon a Time, Recaps

What brings him to their land?  He’s always been fascinated with them, so he decided to just come and see for himself.  Well, they’d love to show him around, but there is the matter of his size.  Poor Anton, he’s too small for GiantLand and too big for FairyLand.  What’s a Tiny giant to do?

I just happen to have a magic mushroom that will make you smaller.

Side effects include hot dog fingers, seeing the dead, and a giant eyeball in the middle of your forehead.  Want one?  Oh, and the shrinkage is temporary, but there’s more where it came from; first one’s free!

Anton is worried because there’s no way he’ll be able to repay her kindness.  No need…if it makes him happy that’s all the payment they desire.  LIES!!!  Run Anton, ruuuuuun!

He doesn’t run.  He pops the mushroom like a giant chump, but only after she tells him her name.

Jacqueline.  But my friends call me Jack.

Ahhhh…..clever!  I guess we know who’s gonna kill his family, huh?

Let’s check in on the Three Musketeers, okay?  They’ve arrived at the airport and Rumpy picks up their tickets before heading over to security.  Henry wonders if Rumpy has ever been outside of StoryBrooke before.  No.  No?  Really?  Then how did he get Henry from Arizona????

No answer there.  Henry wants to know if he’s scared, nervous about meeting his son?

What’s with the third degree, kid?

But it’s obvious Rumpy is lying and he’s nervous as hell.  Nervousness turns to panic as he finds out that he’s going to have to remove his shawl.  Uh oh!  What if he forgets who he is?????  Emma says she’ll help him, she won’t let him forget who he is. 

It’s obvious that removing the shawl has some effect on Rumpy, but in the end he makes it through the screening and is reunited with his shawl without losing his memory.  The incident has most definitely fucked with his head though; he looks terrified at what might have happened.

Over in StoryBrooke, Hook lays out a Queen of Hearts card in an alley.  Must be his way of calling to Cora.  But Cora doesn’t show up.  Regina does instead.  And in spite of her little reunion with Mommy, she still hasn’t forgotten that Hook was supposed to kill her mom and didn’t.

If I didn’t think you’d enjoy it too much I’d totally spank you right now.

He fills her in on the whole giant wanting to go after Charming thing and how he’s now running amuck in town.  Regina thinks that’s just the distraction they need.  Indeed.

Meanwhile, Anton is running down the middle of the street, trying to not get hit by passing cars.  Seems like a good time to head back to FairyLand.  Over there he’s eaten the magic mushroom and is now people sized and enjoying a cup of ale at the tavern with his two new best friends.

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PottyMouth

When she isn't screaming curses at various dance show judges or washing her OWN mouth out with soap, PottyMouth is a proud mama to a gorgeous little boy. And yes, she knows everyone says that about their kids, but it's true when she says it. YES IT IS. Fuck you. She also laments throwing away the chance to be a trophy wife, and would like to find a rich husband so she can sit on her ass all day long and watch TV. If you are fabulously wealthy, look like Hugh Jackman (or ARE in fact Hugh Jackman), and are turned on by foul-mouthed, mature, slightly smooshy women, then she just may be the gal for you. Please send picture, references and your latest bank statement for review.

21 Comments

  1. 1
    sagittariuskim sagittariuskim
    Posted February 14, 2013 at 4:58 pm

    I think this break felt longer because, unlike Christmas, there was nothing to distract us. And it was the only show on hiatus.

    I wasn’t really disappointed with this episode because I really wasn’t expecting anything. I didn’t really about Charming’s real name. And all the updates on OUAT’s Facebook page about this episode was Tiny stuff, so I knew we weren’t going to get any Bae development. So I didn’t have any expectations going in.

    I’m starting to think that Josh Dallas has a “no shirtless scenes” clause in his contract or something. Or this is just something else to tease us with.

    Since Belle is locked up in the hospital, does this mean they have Sneezy doped up there too. So he want see anything magical happening.

    They have so many story lines going this season. I wonder which ones will get closure on before the season ends.

  2. 2
    sagittariuskim sagittariuskim
    Posted February 14, 2013 at 5:01 pm

    I forgot to say I loved how excited Henry was over Cinnabon, but who doesn’t get excited about Cinnabon. I was telling my roommate the other day, how I wished they had drive-thru Cinnabons.

  3. 3
    iwantadventure
    Posted February 14, 2013 at 9:21 pm

    Hi PottyMouth! I would send you one of the Once Valentine cards that are circulating Tumblr but you get told how much we love you on a weekly basis. Hope you enjoyed the day!

    Same to you Sagi, BTW nice new Avatar! I’ll get to my comments momentarily. But I want to address something really important that Sagi just mentioned, drive thru Cinnabon…How do we make that happen?! And why doesn’t it already exist?!

    Okay so I’ve had some time and space since the episode and I have to say I feel no differently. I feel like the writers finally took a left turn into Lost and so I’ve coined the feeling being “Lost-ed”…I was not a fan of Lost but according to people I’ve spoken to about it there were some major issues and some people loved it and some people hated it. Personally I don’t appreciate being jerked around.

    The whole episode was a waste.

    PottyMouth, you raise an excellent question about how Henry actually got to Storybrooke, this is something I’ve wondered and prior to Greg I thought we might get a flashback to when Henry arrived and that would be how we see a regular person enter the town. Instead we still have no idea how that deal transpired but we are getting a Storybrooke flashback and Sherriff McHottypants will be out and about…Yayyy! However, the episodes to look forward to come with a price and after this week’s episode next week is the Oscars so expect another break, though hopefully not as long!

    I feel like I gave a lot of my opinion on this episode in the previous recap’s comments but here we go anyway,

    Belle, I actually understand her, if she has any memories of Storybrooke it’s of being locked away in a cell…For being crazy…So hearing people be so condescending is frustrating…It also reminds me of in Beauty and the Beast when Gaston says “Crazy old, Maurice…” and then they decide Belle is just as crazy as her father and she’s shouting at everyone not to hurt the beast because he’s good and kind. It’s not nice! Belle deserves better! She saw magic and it scared her…Which is interesting because Neal saw magic too, in August’s box and it made him believe something…But then again Neal is a completely separate issue…All in all the lesson is magic is scary to those who don’t understand it but that doesn’t make you crazy…Also, Emma did a great job of leaving town, I’m assuming knowing that Greg was lying…Unless the writers have forgotten about that…Mostly I’m just curious if Belle will take on a new name since she hates everyone calling her Belle…Oh I have an idea, let’s try and guess this name she’ll pick and then go one and a half seasons like it’s some big freaking mystery and then just decide it’s still Belle…Oh wait! Obviously I’m still bitter, in any case I think she should choose Harry so she can shout at people “I’M HARRY, JUST HARRY!”…That would be fun!

    Jack…I don’t have much to say here…I guess I was sort of right, there was a story there because when the show has Emma walk over a skeleton and points out that it’s Jack, you know that’s going to come back later. Too bad the actual tale sucked and they would have done better showing the trailer to Jack the Giant Slayer at that point…My resentment towards her is probably completely irrational but, ugh what a waste. I don’t think that’s the last we’ll be seeing of her though. She slayed a Jabberywocky (possibly THE Jabberwocky) in a “far off land” and they couldn’t afford to pay her so they gave her the magic mushroom to make you smaller, the information about the mushroom was given to her by a “wise old woman”…So, WTF does Jack have to do with Alice or better question, WTF has Once done TO Alice?!

    We already knew James was a chauvinistic pig in the first few minutes we knew him before he died. But it is funny, James and David(Shepherd David not cursed David, UGH FRICKIN WRITERS!!!)have a type. James’ only redeeming quality was that we got more chest than we’ve ever gotten with Charming! They really should have had him with his shirt off, I might have disliked the episode a whole lot less.

    Emma, Rumpel and Henry, thank goodness for them or I might have changed the channel! Okay, I’m probably not capable of going that far but the who,e episode could have been the three of them waiting at the airport and I think I would have found more reasons to love it. I was under the impression that Rumpel knew who he was, even as Gold, actually he definitely did because tat was a clause in the deal with Regina that he would retain his memories and be comfortable…Plus there was the episode before the curse broke that Regina outright asked him his name and then there’s whole season one finale where he brought the vile to the well before the curse was e en broken…However, it’s interesting if his magic is gone because the shawl doesn’t completely work…Which means he’s as vulnerable as Belle is since “what has been done cannot be undone”, currently except it’s worse because Rumpel appears fine, he just can’t protect himself…Then again maybe not having magic and being vulnerable will help him fix Belle.

    And finally we get to the giant disappointment! I have nothing more to say on this David business…Well I should have nothing more to say but I do. What a giant failure on the writers’ part. They really had me going, racking my brain and then the build up was just perfect…After an episode titled “In The Name of the Brother”…My hopes were way high…This episode lived up to it’s name…It was Tiny and useless and probably should have been titled “Much Ado About Nothing”, except I actually like that play. What was the point? To show that people who started their Storybrooke lives in the hospital have no Storybrooke personas…
    L-A-M-E!!! I mean come on, there is a HUGE difference between David Nolan and Charming but apparently he’s just effing David, which basically means that as a character he’s a hypocrite to the “We are both” philosophy…So that’s great, way to make the character tiny…Oh…I get it now…Still stupid. I honestly would not be so upset if there wasn’t such a big deal made but there was. They just hyped it up and Josh Dallas said it was “Obvious and interesting”…How is it interesting?! Really?! What is interesting about the fact that his name is David?! This means he’s no one but the Pauper of The Prince and the Pauper in FairyTale Land. There’s no greater story, except that he’s Charming but Uhhhh that’s just a dumb thought process…How could there not be more to his character?! Who really sat around that writing table and said, “Yes! Let’s name him…Wait for it…David! It doesn’t mess with people’s heads in a bad way, we’ll just make David Nolan a ginormous asswipe and then ‘David the lonely goat herder’ will become Charming but we’ll lay it all on the table but from the beginning and make it SEEM like this awesome mindfuck!” No! Just no. I feel so cheated. And there was no nakedness to offset the awfulness. At least when True Blood positions a terrible plot point that makes no sense everyone gets naked in between and you forget that the plot point makes no sense. They could have worked it into the scene where Charming goes to get Anton out of the hole…He could have created a rope out of his pants and shirt! And then everyone would be happy!

    At least next week is in NYC!!! I wasn’t aware NY is a kingdom but it’s good to know, explains why I like to believe I’m a princess. And Neal is back…Or is it Bae?! Bael?!

  4. 4
    Wendy
    Posted February 15, 2013 at 8:48 am

    Anyone notice the amount of red in this episode? The opening scene: Henry, Em, and Snow were all wearing red. Then, in Rumpy’s car, everything is red except for Rumpy. It struck me as kind of odd.

  5. 5
    sagittariuskim sagittariuskim
    Posted February 15, 2013 at 3:54 pm

    Adventure: Thanks, it’s Victorique from the anime Gosick. It’s somewhat Once related, I watched the anime a few years ago and finished rewatching it yesterday. And I noticed that it had its own “I will always find you!” moments, the other main character even says that line at one point.

    I really don’t understand why there isn’t a drive-thru Cinnabon. If Krispy Kreme can do it, Cinnabon should be able to.

  6. 6
    April
    Posted February 16, 2013 at 3:13 pm

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDHr5IMFRUk

    This makes me smile everytime I watch it. Crazy old Maurice was in here raving

  7. 7
    iwantadventure
    Posted February 16, 2013 at 3:41 pm

    Haha, April, that was really funny!!!

    Can we discuss this picture of August on the ground, wearing a green screen cap?! http://www.justjared.com/photo-gallery/2812807/ginnifer-goodwin-jennifer-morrison-once-upon-a-time-filming-03/

  8. 8
    sagittariuskim sagittariuskim
    Posted February 16, 2013 at 4:56 pm

    Is that Gepetto? And it looks like August has blood speckled on his face. The last time we saw him he was still wood. I don’t know. All my theories on what could have happened are to gruesome for Once.

  9. 9
    iwantadventure
    Posted February 16, 2013 at 6:46 pm

    The darts on his face aren’t blood, they’re the CGI…But he does look hurt…If they do something to him I’m going to be really mad…Really really mad…And the writers are already on my bad side so this is not a good thing!

  10. 10
    hot cawfee
    Posted February 17, 2013 at 6:52 am

    I wasn’t “wowed” with the episode either. I guess it was purely functional–to get another portal going, getting us closer to Bae who is or isnt Henry’s father, getting more of Charmings story (I still think there is another sibling—squee), etc. Maybe we can chalk it up as The Ugly Carrot Episode (watched Bridemaids last night–and I think it fits)

    @3 I Want– good point about Belle!!! She “saw magic and it scared her”, same as Neal looking into the box—I think Belle believes that true loe is magic and yet what she saw………

    And our Rumpy is back to cowardly and lacking in magic—-

    I am excited for tinight—–NYC is magical and sooooo many stories we can have—Eloise at the Plaza, Bremen Town Musicians in the subways, street corners, punk clubs, Alice in Wonderland statue in Central Park—Manhattan is one huge portal ya’ll!!!!

    I am going in with alot of hope—-Ugly Carrot Episode was last week–we are on a up-tick for this week.

  11. 11
    hot cawfee
    Posted February 17, 2013 at 6:54 am

    OH–one last question—-do we know who brought Henry to Storey Brooke—-was it August?????

  12. 12
    iwantadventure
    Posted February 17, 2013 at 10:29 am

    Cawfee, I was under the impression that no one knew who August was…Emma certainly didn’t…Wow look at that contrast, August rides into town and everyone is okay with it, because everyone was cursed and there was no magic…Greg crashes into town and everyone considers letting him die…Magic does come with price. Anyway, I was also under the impression that August had never been to Storybrooke…But it would make sense…He made Neal go away until she fulfilled her destiny and then he made sure Rumpel got the baby there for Regina…How very Harry Potter that would have been…August, riding into Storybrooke on his motorcycle in the cover of night to deliver Henry…I LOVE IT!!!

    I hope you’re right about tonight’s episode, I read that the last 30 seconds are totally unexpected, so they’re going to drop a bomb and make us wait…

  13. 13
    sagittariuskim sagittariuskim
    Posted February 17, 2013 at 5:34 pm

    I has so many feels right now! That’s the reason he left Emma. What a selfish…ugh.

  14. 14
    Mike Hunt
    Posted February 17, 2013 at 6:01 pm

    Oh yeah!!! What a great episode!!! I just can’t believe you guys. What’s the matter with a giant named Tiny??? I have a cat named, \DOG!!!\ For the very first time I actually liked Charming!!! Going and stealing and killing giants without any good reason. I loved it!!! Then when Jack went and got herself hurt. Well sorry about yer luck bitch. When it comes to packing her ass down that beanstalk or the treasure. Treasure gonna win every time!!! A girl hadn’t outta get herself in that situation in the first place!!! That’s all I can say. It probably wont ever happen again but for once I can honestly say that Charming got my approval 100% percent. Even if it was only for a minute or two…..

  15. 15
    Moli Moli
    Posted February 17, 2013 at 6:15 pm

    Wasn’t expecting that twist

  16. 16
    sagittariuskim sagittariuskim
    Posted February 17, 2013 at 6:17 pm

    Aww, I want more of the seer.

  17. 17
    iwantadventure
    Posted February 17, 2013 at 6:27 pm

    It’s only two weeks! This is exciting because it’s not three lol! At least this episode was full of revelations and makes up for the sucktastic ep last week! I totally agree, Sagi, but everyone was a bit selfish in this episode…And no one got punched! August’s box wasn’t exactly full of magic but then again that makes sense, the writers aren’t going for big mystery anymore…Simple stuff…I got yelled for screaming with the big reveal but the rest of it was good…My only compliant and it’s itty bitty is I expected the whole thing to be more emotional…Not like frustrating emotional but like how Once used to be able to get me to cry…The revelation at the end didn’t disappoint! So much to discuss!

  18. 18
    hot cawfee
    Posted February 19, 2013 at 7:14 am

    “I know you’re Baelfire”
    holy cow——————————-did not think that was in the box!!!! ANd slow claps for all who saw that coming way before I did—I came late to the “Neal is Bae” party.

    The Seer is awesome and I want more of her—-and now Rumpy has another power and I am beside myself!!!!!!!!

    I thought it would be more emotional too—esp in the bar between Emma and Neal—I guess one of my Emma’s jewelry questions has been answered.

    And we have been reconciling mothers and daughters, now time for fathers and sons.

  19. 19
    sagittariuskim sagittariuskim
    Posted February 20, 2013 at 7:25 pm

    We get to meet Snow’s mother in the next episode!

  20. 20
    Mike Hunt
    Posted February 21, 2013 at 1:26 am

    Sure is funny that I thought that this episode (Episode 14 – Manhattan) was the sleeper. At least with Hurley/Tiny we got to see him throwing cars at Charming. I was howling as if Red was in heat!!! He was a pretty bad shot though. Feller must be kinda near sighted when he is up that high. I bet I would of hit him. Any ways the best thing in this episode was the the gal with her eyes in her hands. I didn’t get why she would go and get her eyes all sowd shut like that. Was it just so her eyes would grow in yer hands like that??? That seems crazy even to me!!! Depth perception has gotta be a bitch. She must have pissed off the wrong Witch or Queen I guess mebbie. Because we know Rumpty Dumpty didn’t did it. I’ll be back after the recap so I can freshen up my rememberin a bit!!!

  21. 21
    Mike Hunt
    Posted February 21, 2013 at 1:48 am

    WOW!!! Tough crowd tonight!!! OK, let’s try this one. A feller finally makes it home after painting the old town just about as red as it gets. He stumbles in just to find his wife a sitting at the other end of the table. She has her heat tucked into her hands with her elbows on the table and she is a slowly shaking her head. The old boy proceeds to sit down at the other end and put his head in his hands the same way. After a short time you hear the wife sputtering from within her hands. \Drunk again!!!\ she says. After a short pause you here the old feller say back. \Me too!!!\ That’s the best I got for ya tonight folks. Thank you!!! Thank you very much!!! So sorry about yer luck but it looks like I’ll be here all week!!!

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