Back in the present day, rank-ass basement, Regina finds a severed arm and an armless Dr. Whale lying on the floor. Sorry, but I’ve seen more convincing looking severed organs at my local IParty. Guess what wasn’t in the budget this week what with all the enchantment spell and glowing heart CGI called for by the script. Regina says she knows Whale took her beloved’s body AS WELL AS one of her hearts. The nerve. My question: how did he know Daniel’s body and the hearts were here? And where they were located? How did he gain access to her crypt? We learn Whale did bring Daniel back but – wait for it, wait for it – HE’S A MONSTERRRR!!!
Fairy Land Regina takes the doctor to her mother’s chamber of hearts. Jefferson speaks on our behalf and asks who on earth these hearts belonged to, but Regina has no clue. Ma dukes was a monster (so many monster references, you’d think this was a motif or something..) and caused unnecessary pain and suffering to many.
Lots of back-and-forth between timelines and worlds now. In the present, Whale is comatose. Charming shows up, demanding answers. His interrogations are highly annoying and evoke more of an “ugh, you again?” response from me versus the “yay, Charming’s here to save the day!” reaction I think the writers are looking for. Regina spills the beans about Daniel, but he Charming’s already heard all this from Snow. Regina tells Charming that Whale has brought her former fiancé back to life, because he practices something “more powerful than magic.” Um, can we stop beating around the push and call a spade a spade? Science.
She has no clue know whose heart was transplanted into Daniel. Charming gives her two choices. Give up Daniel’s whereabouts or go to the slammer. Any by slammer, I mean the one room, comfortable-looking cell that everyone seems to escape from.
Who’s same-age-as-you daughter disappeared via hat into a magical realm thought to have been destroyed 28 years ago and made you sheriff?
Regina thinks it’ll be like awakening from a coma and thinking of the last place you were, so for Daniel this would be the stables. WHICH IS WHERE HENRY IS…DUN DUN DUN. Christ this kid has a knack for wrong place, wrong time, wrong apple turnover.
Henry is still waiting for his ancient horse to tell him when he’s ready to be ridden (never) by an 8 year old “knight” (also never) when….
Oh hai, technically I’m kinda sorta your adopted dad. As if you weren’t in a fucked up enough family situation already.
We cut back to Fairy Land, where Hook still insists he’s an innocent blacksmith. Emma says the ogres will get him (he’s been tied to a tree and they’ve been summoned) and he acts scared. Sorry, but even if this is an act, Hook should be more badass than this. I’m a little disappointed. He admits Emma’s bested him and he can count those who’ve done that on one hand. Cute. He finally tells them he’s Hook. He shares Cora’s plan, and maybe I’ve been watching a little too much “Homeland,” but I definitely think he’s a mole/spy for Cora. This monologue of his is rehearsed. Hook will help them find the portal before Cora does, as well as some compass they’ll evidently need.
“Never smile at a crocodile//No, you can’t get friendly with a crocodile//Don’t be taken in by his welcome grin//He’s imagining how well you’d fit within his skin//Never smile at a crocodile//Never dip your hat and stop to talk a while//Never run, walk away, say goodnight, not good day//Clear the aisle, but never smile at Mr. Crocodile”