Pretty Little Liars Recap: Out of the Frying Pan, Into the Inferno

Last week Spencer learned that Toby was teamed up with Mona and part of the A Team, Caleb and Paige teamed up to take Mona down, Meredith knocked Aria the fuck out and tried to reverse Flowers in the Attic her and Mike is still M.I.A. This week opens with Spencer and Toby getting hot and heavy in her bedroom to some cheesy electronic music until Toby decides to Christian Grey her with some choking action. It’s just a dream as Spencer wakes up and spots the key Toby dropped on her dresser…a reminder that her boyfriend really was the douche she always warned Emily about.

Aria and Emily discuss Aria’s father seeing Melissa the night Ali disappeared when Em’s mom decides to show up and parent. She gives Em a package from Nate’s roommate containing several things Em had given to Ali over the years which she believes Maya had tried to return to her. Hanna is hanging around her house icing her wrist and trying to get Caleb to meet with her when Ashley decides to join in on the parenting game. She starts 20 questions with Hanna to pretend like she cares even though she hasn’t been around for a few weeks and offers to talk to the principal to have Mona removed. Byron’s turn to pretend to care as he talks with Aria about Meredith and her history of psycho business that involves medication she evidently stopped taking. Byron then talks about how they overpaid on the house and couldn’t afford a furnace so they rolled up Aria like a burrito in a blanket. I like how this week the parents decided to all show up in case one of the girls ran away or died or something. Considering everything they have gone through and how one of their friends was murdered you would think the parents might care a little more. Maybe they hope one of their kids gets Ali’ed. 

Hanna eavesdrops on Aria who is on the phone leaving a message for Ezra and then does the same to Paige who reveals that Caleb is the one who left the brain in the locker and that she plans to meet him later that night. Maybe Hanna is A since she’s all up in everyone’s phone conversations. Em and Spencer meet up in the bathroom to look at a notebook that belonged to Alison. Spencer brushes it off and says that Ali wasn’t a loyal person and that they shouldn’t care what happened to her which Em takes offense to since she wanted a piece of that. She pushes the notebook on her one more time which flashes back to the most hilarious jail scenes since Beyond Scared Straight.

Toby is wearing a fucking doorag like he’s been serving hard time for years and years while meeting with Ali who confronts him with notes she received from A. Seriously is Toby auditioning for Beyond Scared Straight? Why is he wearing a doorag with that stupid scar under his eye. Did he narrowly escape a shank attempt over some pudding? Ali wants to know why Toby isn’t going after the others that were also outside the garage when Jenna was blinded. Toby brushes her off and sends her away but not before Ali rubs it in his face that he never got to kiss her. Spence starts crying and Em thinks it is because Ali might have tried to hook up with Toby but Spencer confesses that they broke up but doesn’t disclose why. Spencer looks like death…some foundation could help with that. Spence gets a text that Aria needs help because Fitz broke up with her so she storms out to help her but Ella stops her to try and see what is going on. Spence throws some attitude and storms out causing a huge scene. I’m pretty sure the teachers should just be thankful that the girls show up at all.