Dreads – her look is kind of creative and fun, but also ugly and her green gummy fringe looks a lot like snot. Dr Seussian high fashion.
Elena – Her beige nightmare comes out and it’s the same big-shouldered football playing dominatrix she’s already done. Also losing a hand and a leg to the gluing process was in vain because candy be droppin’
Fabio – His look is boring but nice and Lifetime spends as much time on it as I do.
Dmitry – His look is very fun and sassy and whatever candy he used actually just looks like beads. First dress yet that looks like a real piece of normal clothing, but he is eventually going to be critiqued for having too much ballroom in his designs.
Afrasian – His piece is an expected explosion of weird. Kind of reminds me of Native American beadwork, but with an anime octopus backside. Also a design that sheds candy.
Christopher – His piece is tasteful and wearable (look #2 in that category), but not very exciting or stand-out
Raul/Vampire Bangs – has built something that looks well designed, but kinda fugly and boring at the same time. That actually sounds like it takes talent!
Buffi – Her model is in head to toe tacky sugar rush and even carries a lollipop. Buffi thinks this is very SJP – but that woman has worn some atrocities on and off-screen, and popularized wearing a necklace with your name in gold, so maybe she’s right.
Lantie – Her glowing remarks about her own piece are that it isn’t her normal design, she wouldn’t wear it or expect anyone else to. Where can I buy one!?! Also Dylan recognizes the umbrella immediately. Ruh roh.
Blorpheus – His piece is the first “wow moment” on the runway for me. It looks very stiff and the design is very reminiscent of what he did last week, but it is arrestingly beautiful.
Heidi then calls out who is safe – Dmitry, Dreads, Afrasian, Urkel, Vampire Bangs, Tara Reid, Christopher, Fabio and Grandma Moses. Some of these people are disappointed and some of them should be verryyyy grateful. Buffi is first to be criticized and Heidi dislikes the use of paper for the skirt and the over-accessorizing. What happened to her hammered-out umbrella? Did Lantie use it? Kors is also not impressed and calls this looks less Carry Bradshaw and more Toddlers and Tiaras gone bezerk.
Strong words from someone who is clearly no stranger to the bathtub spraytan