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It seems like everyone’s baby is crying simultaneously, and I kind of want to kill myself. Dmitry the Perfect’s baby’s name is Brandon, and he asks Elena what her baby’s name is. ‘Her name is Asshole. Here she is!” She is really working her way into my good graces.
“Her name is Asshole because that’s where she came from: Heidi Klum.”
They’re all trying to get some work done, and it is just freaky seeing them dress up these armless mannequins. Unibrow loves his baby way too much, and he’s probably going to take it back to Atlas and try to breastfeed it.
The girl outfits are being made by Elena, Tara Reid, and Christopher. He flat out says he can totally beat them, proving that some of Skunk’s essence rubbed off during their last hug.
Dmitry plans on making a red and black jumpsuit with a large, open collar. I guess that’s the trendy part. Tara Reid’s baby is quiet, so she’s hoping SIDS took care of it. She has made pink and black leggings in a sort of zebra print. Yuck. Leggings are the worst. I guess she’s designing for a toddler slut.
The rest of the designers are struggling with their loudmouth babies, and are starting to get really frazzled. Christopher truly outgays himself with “now I know why Judy went off the deep end with Liza.” Yeah, it could be that. Or the destructive addiction to pills and alcohol. Same diff.
“So help me, God, I will cut you, baby.”
Tim stops by to check in with the designers and he has a special visitor. That bitch Heidi Klum. She’s tickled that the designers are so tortured. She has decent point that they need to know what it’s like to have a baby so they can make functional clothes. Why didn’t she just lend them some of hers? Lord knows she has more than enough.
Heidi and Tim visit with Elena, and her blazer has a ruffly pleated collar that I suppose would be cute on a baby. Luckily, there are no shoulder pads in sight. When asked if cleaning the blazer would be an issue, Heidi completely ignores the question and gives a robotic answer about making something special. As if to say, “you think I do my own laundry? Please.” But she thinks it’s cute so far.
The theme is The Missing Mario Brother.
Heidi points out that you can’t see the monster print lining in Unibrow’s design, so he needs to get to fixing that. Overall, not a bad review for him. Dmitry’s work so far looks like Little Red Riding Hood, which is dangerous territory. It also looks like she has a backpack instead of a basket. Get it together, Dmitry! I will not have you sent home just because you hate children and aren’t designing your best. Sonjia interviews that his outfit looks a little homeless in her opinion. Damn, girl, kitty got claws.