I must say I love Christopher’s creation. I can forgive a denim jacket when it’s on a child. She looks like she’s ready for church, and the jacket seems finished well. Unfortunately Mary J. Blige has a stank look on her face most of the time, which puts a damper on it. Fuck off, Nene.
First modeling job at 18 months. Eat your heart out, Tyra Banks.
Up next is Elena’s outfit. It doesn’t really stand out to me in a good way. The look is scattered and the pieces don’t go together at all. This is an outfit for a basic bitch baby.
“Why you gotta play me like that, Elena?”
Since there are only six designers left, the judges will speak to all of them tonight. I’m hoping for a heaping dose of side-eye. Sonjia is up first, stressing how comfortable and easy-going her look is. Heidi says he looks sharp and like a little man. She loves it. Hilary Duff neighs but doesn’t really say anything. Michael Kors stops applying bronzer long enough to say that the mom looks as polished and comfortable as the baby. Nina rounds it out with compliments, so it seems Sonjia is in the top.
Tara Reid talks about the baby’s asymmetrical denim vest—three words that should never be combined. Heidi actually loves the jacket and thinks it would fit in with her collection. But she blasts TR for the zipper on baby skin and slutty hemline. Nina doesn’t like that it’s impractical.
Cover your shame, whore!
Unibrow’s modern nautical look for the baby is praised by Kors, who is now glowing as if he’s radioactive. All the judges love the baby outfit, but Heidi has a problem with the mom’s look. It’s too old apparently. Well, Heidi, not all women dress like they’re 21 regardless of age.
Kors calls Elena’s baby outfit a baby sample sale. It does look extremely disjointed. Everyone else but Nina loves the jacket. Nina once again thinks it’s impractical, and Elena interrupts Nina with some rude comment.
“Maybe if I don’t make any sudden movements, Nina won’t attack.”
Dmitry’s baby is asleep in his mother’s arm, and it is too cute. Dmitry even unzips the hood while the baby stays sleeping. Kors doesn’t like that the hood unzips into a cape. All the other judges correct his ass because a lot of kid’s clothing have that function and kids love it. Heidi thinks it’s a very commercial look, to which I agree.
Nina ONCE AGAIN thinks a baby look is impractical. This time it’s Christopher’s. The judges do think it’s cute, and Heidi actually likes bitter-ass Mary J. Blige’s outfit. Hilary compliments him on how well the jacket is cut, and everyone loved his looks.