Real Housewives of NYC Recap: Menstrual Maelstrom

25 Comments

1. 1
   cloudsinmycoffee
   Posted August 16, 2012 at 12:25 pm

   Heather continues looking like a Pixar drawn shark.

   Ramona is a fucking lunatic and needs someone to give her an IV of valium.

   Sonja is just nasty and pathetic looking now.

   LuAnn is an obnoxious asshole, as always.

   Carole looks confused half the time.

   Aviva is as interesting as a potted plant.

   Aviva’s father is pretty much disgusting and needs to be carted off somewhere.

   Mary-O is totally doing some young thing on the side.

   Jacques looks like he should have been cast in Ratatouille.

2. 2
   aliens.rock
   Posted August 16, 2012 at 1:17 pm

   I couldn’t believe that the bathroom conversation of Sonja and a gay guy was televised. WTF? So disgusting. She is truly a white trash, and “money can’t buy you class” kind of a woman. Was she on drugs? She seemed all over the place. And the posing… She looked like she had an overbite of an overinflated lip. Not cute, just weird….
   Heather seemed very professional and collected. I will second her in getting upset about the accent conversation at the end of episode. I felt like they implied that Jaques’ accent is so bad that it almost seems fake. Well, if he is a real Frenchman, we are left with a conclusion that his accent is really, really bad. That is mean and rude.
   Aviva is a shit-stirrer. I don’t like her from the beginning. Maybe she is trying to secure her spot in the next season of RHNY.

3. 3
   OutHouseCat
   Posted August 16, 2012 at 2:44 pm

   SonJa was just gross. Straight from the bloody tampon disaster to posing next to the food for her toaster oven box. That really makes people want to run out and buy one, doesn’t it? I’d be thinking about used tampons every time I came near the thing. (As if that old hag still gets her period, but still, it’s just the thought…EWW)

4. 4
   hot cawfee
   Posted August 16, 2012 at 2:45 pm

   I think ya hit dead center Aliens– Aviva is looking (as the producer’s sis-in-law) to secure her spot on the show. She is such a dreadful “real-estate dropper” like Lu’s “name dropping”.

   I am sub-titling this episode the “Did I hear that right?” $onja, Lady Morgan, and issue with “the bloody flux” and making chicken parm in a toaster oven???? Did she ask one of the folks there if they watched her videos on toaster oven oven cooking??? I think Julia Child is choking on a big glass of gin in the big kitchen in the sky!!!! And someone tell me please if that was a nasty bruise on $onja’s upper bicep( right I think) covered in make-up??

   Oh Carole– I really thought you got off an awesome shot at Lu–”Well thats just rude” when you found out that Jacques wasn’t coming. I was so happy until I watched the show for a third time and realized you said “Well lets just move” Sigh…..

   Lu– you did know what Jacques was up to and did the old “Hahahaha-what a great joke/He did????I had no idea!!!!” His accent sounds alittle different to me this season–is he forcing it more?? No clue. In true fashion–they skipped out b4 any further confrontation could take place.

   And that leads me back to Aviva–I am glossing over her Dad b/c I just cant—”You’re mean” in French–really???

   Ramona– whew– thats sooooome air-brushing—but omg– Please stop making sense. Your insight and advice to Aviva about facing her fears was….good. I agree with Cloudy that Mary-O totally has a young piece on the side. But this week you had some normalness. I look forward to full-time crazy.

   And Heather– you know I am still on her side. I like her– she is like the slightly batty, over-friendly girl who always seems to sit next to you in class and wants to borrow a pen, your notes etc. Harmless and a little annoying. Lady Morgan owes Heather bigtime—an apology, and credit for pulling this all together. Heather is many things– a liar isn’t one of them.

5. 5
   hot cawfee
   Posted August 16, 2012 at 2:48 pm

   And Carole– honey you are with a bunch of high-maintenance women. Heather ate already b/c she works full-time and has spent alot of unpaid time with $onja. But the rest of the “ladies” I am taking to task. When invited to lunch you eat what is offered unless you are allergic to it. I think these cows prefer a liquid lunch. I mean this is a PRINCESS for the love of Mike!!!!!!!

6. 6
   featherhead
   Posted August 16, 2012 at 3:04 pm

   I don’t think Mary-O and Ramona realized that Lu (she loves it when I call her that) and PePe were trying to pull a fast one on them with the wine tasting. It wasn’t until Aviva brought it up at dinner in Florida that she thought it was horrible of Lu &PePe were trying to embarrass Ramona. Now Aviva brings it up every chance she gets. What a shit – stirrer she has shown herself to be.

7. 7
   labowner
   Posted August 16, 2012 at 3:13 pm

   Lu and Ramona are two peas in a pod with their denial of their horrible behaviors. Not sure how divorce works in NY (are they waiting until Avery turns 18) but why oh why does Mario stay with her? Does she make that much money? He can hang with Harry and they both can strut around NY screwing anything that will let them.

8. 8
   hot cawfee
   Posted August 16, 2012 at 3:27 pm

   Lab– I think they have a pre-nup. Would make sense b/c Mary-O’s family bid-ness is pretty well established. And I credit Ramona for being a savvy bidness woman. I thyink if she walked in on Mary-O and saw with her own crazy eyes that he was with another woman (or man–no judgement), her massive ego would refuse to believe it.

9. 9
   LastCall
   Posted August 16, 2012 at 6:08 pm

   I cannot believe how unprofessional and ungrateful Heather acted toward Lady Morgan, especially after SonJa was kind enough to let Heather work on such an important campaign!!! Holla:)

   Oh Dear God, I do love these crazy ass bitches! I think Ramona and Sonja prolly got together before filming started and thought up different ways to get themselves more camera time. But they aren’t all that creative, so most of their plan involved nothing more than acting like lunatics as much as possible. To their credit, though, it’s working. And yes, Heather does look like a Pixar shark. As someone on another site noted, she also looks like a young Maria Ouspenskaya. (some people might have to look that one up)

10. 10
    2muchbravo
    Posted August 16, 2012 at 11:32 pm

    With all the makeup Heather had on near the end of the hour she looked more like a drag queen than anything else!

11. 11
    MarianMoney
    Posted August 17, 2012 at 3:46 am

    I’m afraid to use my toaster oven now..

12. 12
    RomoSheDiNT
    Posted August 17, 2012 at 11:32 am

    I love that Jason guy. Telling everyone what’s what! I know he’s not part of the show and it’s like who cares, but rock on man! He got paid, right? Surely Heather had to pay him. No? Was that an I’ll owe you a favor type of a deal? Or maybe she cashed one in. Wth was going on that they all worked for free being big, badasses? Nevermind… not important, I guess. That’s all I have to talk about really. Other than great recap as always, BSL!!
    Damn those NY bitches need to slap eachother or something, shit!

13. 13
    RomoSheDiNT
    Posted August 17, 2012 at 11:35 am

    Ok so his name is James. He looks like a Jason so there!

14. 14
    CJ
    Posted August 19, 2012 at 1:28 pm

    BSL, that still you’ve got of Ramoaner confirms it – she’s possessed! It is sure to be a HW classic. lol

    At the beginning of the season, I wanted to like Aviva simply for calling out Ramoaner as “white trash.” However, her behavior and the introduction of George have caused me to take a turn in my opinion.

15. 15
    hot cawfee
    Posted August 19, 2012 at 1:47 pm

    @9 Lasty– your nickname Cookie–I bestow with muchy love!!!! From what I have read on-line and other places Ramona, $onja and Lu (she loves when we call her that) gave the newbies a hard time and refused to film (and do re-shots) with them. They will regret not showing love for Princess Carole.

16. 16
    2muchbravo
    Posted August 19, 2012 at 6:36 pm

    Right now I’m liking Carole the most. She can read people well and everyone seems to like her and get along with her. I wonder what Krazy Kellie would think of her. Would Kellie be “up here” and Carole “down here”? Would she be impressed by the princess thing and connections and therefore respect her or jealous of her because Carole’s cooler than she is??? Then, of course, she’d be a crazy bitch!

    LuMan and Jacques knew what they were doing with the ‘wine game.’ Puhleeze.
    I’m afraid we’re watching Sonja starting on a downward spiral. Girlfriend seems to be losing her grip and I agree that she’s on something. Sad really. Heather needs to cut her some slack.
    She was a major bitch at the photo shoot. Yes, Sonja was a scatter brain. But, the complete disinterest in Sonja’s part of the shoot was embarassing to watch. “Uh huh. Yeah. That’s good. Ok, that’s a wrap. Let’s get out of here, ” compared to her naked man shoot, ” Yes! Perfect! That’s it! That’s great. A little more to the right. That’s it! You got it! Perfect! You got it! Awesome!” I know she was working for free but she should have accepted that Sonja may not have agreed to everything she suggested. It IS Sonja’s product afterall. Her face is going on the box not Heather’s.

17. 17
    Harleigh
    Posted August 20, 2012 at 5:36 am

    If you read Lu’s Bravo blog, almost every single comment speaks of how awesome, beatuiful and talented she is. She really has spent time writing herself positive affirmations!

    I wonder if they have control over the comment section, I refuse to believe that many people love her.

18. 18
    classy drunk
    Posted August 20, 2012 at 6:01 am

    @2much, then I think that the toaster oven with Sonja (sexy J) would sell better than abs man. I think abs man takes away the focus from Sonja (sexy J) who is the person who is shlepping this item.

19. 19
    LAC
    Posted August 20, 2012 at 10:50 am

    BSL, how do you do it? I had to stop my DVR and get up several times. I used to be able to watch this show in one sitting. Well, that was before old horny people, menstrual cycles, and an increased desire to yank a prostetic leg off a person in order to beat another person or that same person with it started to enter my mind.

    Sonja – my god, the mayor of Cuntville has just arrived! And to have to hear about your bloody period? I don’t want to talk about MY period, ya twat. And not wasting folks time with your late diva arrivals and nonsense is just too hard for you, isn’t it? And why do you feed that Pinot filled vortex of insanity with bullshit? Just go back to wearing your bed jacket and trapping your interns in the bedroom already.

    Ramona – uggh!! I am so tired of closeups of her crazy eyes, tense face, open yap, and screeching. She has five seconds of sanity per episode as far as I can see.

    Aviva – ok, you need to retire horny pops from my TV. If he shows up at St. Bart’s with a speedo, I am done! And shit stirring and Ramona fellating is winding down, I hope. Calling her crazy is like saying water is wet and night is dark – you don’t need to get offended by it.

    Caroline – I just bet you have a great place near you to order pizza. Normal women would do it, but you need to read the memo on this show – unless it is served in wine or martini glass, they don’t eat it. Caustic remarks are easier made between dainty bites of salad.

    Luann – still a snotty ass, but she is entering the mid season stage of making funny comments and looking haughty. Just in time.

    Heather – Keep up the good work with Ramona, but think about a softer lipstick. That Joker vibe is getting stronger.

20. 20
    BelowSeaLevel
    Posted August 20, 2012 at 11:00 am

    LAC, I do it because I love you guys! It has been a rough season when, so far, highlights are a couple of ladies getting their brows waxed and some horny old guy bringing a lizard to a party. Keep the faith. I can’t tell for sure, but I think I might see a twinkling of a light at the end of the tunnel.

    All of you are spot on with your observations and I love reading your comments! Thanks for hanging in there while we wait for St Barths.

21. 21
    BelowSeaLevel
    Posted August 20, 2012 at 11:06 am

    …but if George shows up in a Speedo, I’m outta here.

22. 22
    LAC
    Posted August 20, 2012 at 11:10 am

    BSL – LOL!! If that happens, “Watch what happens” will turn into “What did you watch last night instead of this?”

23. 23
    BelowSeaLevel
    Posted August 20, 2012 at 11:16 am

    It will be like those SNL skits with tubes of projectile…you know. I laugh so much at everyone’s comments. I did have a lot of fun drawing eyebrows on Heather and Lu a couple of episodes back, though.

24. 24
    Marge
    Posted August 22, 2012 at 8:00 pm

    I don’t know what it is about this year, I’m sure the sliding ratings heavily influence the content, but there’s sooo much sex talk and it’s not good sex talk. It’s embarassing and gross, not one bit cute or sexy. Aviva’s dad was hideous. Sonja is pathetic and needs to just declare her sexuality one way or another. There’s talk of ball gags and masturbating, orgasms, S&M, eating big weiners, and on and on. By no means am I a prude, but this year’s RHONY are acting like horny old, desperate women. And if I hear one more episode devoted to the stupid setup/not a setup of Ramona’s wine-tasting I’m gonna lose it. It’s been mentioned in at least 4 episodes and counting. Aviva’s voice wears on me, her hairstyle is soooo 80′s and I’m tired of hearting about the leg in every episode. Heather needs a hair and makeup makeover stat, but at least she’s more real than the others. Carol is totally out of place on here and why does she feel the need to placate and kiss Aviva’s ass?

25. 25
    thinkpool
    Posted September 4, 2012 at 6:12 pm

    What white trash was watching 6 year old Aviva
    when her foot got cut off by a conveyor belt?