Pushing the limits of what viewers can hear before vomiting violently, Andy asks Aviva if George was that sexually charged up with her mother. The answer is yes, they did have an intensely sexual relationship. Rules like don’t mix your liquors, don’t jaywalk, don’t swallow gum, and don’t blow dry your hair in the bathtub exist for a reason. Don’t ask someone about their parents’ sex life. It’s wrong, wrong, wrong. There are things we should never know and places the mind shouldn’t go…like there.
There’s more viewer questions about Aviva’s prudish attitude about RamonJa considering the Hornysaurus stuck his wrinkly woody in SonJa’s back. Aviva says her father vehemently denies doing that because inappropriate sex addicts never do shit like that.
Toastergate! On to the only toaster oven that make people think of vaginas. SonJa gets why Heather became frustrated. The vagina oven is ready to go, but it’s now part of a SonJa Home collection of tongs, tampons, mitts, and maxi pads. Don’t expect to see it any day soon.
We gangsta and ain’t nothin’ you bitches can do about it.
Heather feels like she delivered what she promised, a campaign, but SonJa just wants the sexy J. SonJa’s not a Times New Roman girl, so she pulls out some samples that were sent in by viewers. Why couldn’t Heather Google a sexy J for her? Poor SonJa’s been busy Googling white trash and Holla! all fricking day and night.
Not only is it a Sexy J, it’s also a contraceptive device.
Next is a montage of the troubles SonJa has dealt with this season, such as her divorce settlement and financial troubles. She’s going to have to sell her home in France (big eye roll from Carole), but she’s been talking with her ex recently. Aviva’s comparison of her to Anna Nicole Smith doesn’t bother SonJa because her ex plays tennis and is sprightly. Aviva agrees that it isn’t true, it was just a snarky comment made during an argument.
SonJa doesn’t feel badly about confronting Jacques at the holiday party because Lu’s her friend. Lu points at Aviva calling her out as a runaway bride, then opens her big mouth saying she’s going to have a runaway groom. Andy immediately asks if Jacques is that big of a sucker to have proposed. He has some brain function.
Sadly, SonJa’s dog, Millou, passed away. He was 18-years-old, so he was her companion for many years. It is very sad.
When the topic of Aviva and Ramona comes up, Ramona thinks Aviva’s problem with her is displaced anger. Meanwhile, Aviva thinks the problems started in St. Barth when Ramona “sabotaged” her and Reid. Things get really heated when Aviva brings up the removal of George from a charity event for abused women, that he wasn’t invited to, after he grabbed Ramona’s arm.
Does anyone have floss? Aviva’s ass is so sinewy.