Sonja’s not a double-facer, so she gets fed up with the conversation and walks off. She’s calling Reid to take that package back. Jaysus!
“Overweight, Old Ladies Gone Wild!” It’s gonna go VIRAL!
During their double-facer double date, Aviva is blathering on about the roaring and ranting that the ladies have been doing since their girls trip got co-ed-ed. They all crack up at Reid’s naming the trip “Overweight, Old Ladies Gone Wild.” Really? How about “Pussy-Whipped Nerds Gone Wild” for the sequel? Or “Whiny, Bitchy, Selfish, Fraidy-Cat Stayed Tame” for the next installment?
The rest of the ladies enjoy their dinner without the double-daters. After laughing about Heather’s broken nose breaking the spell between her and Ramona, Lu suggests throwing Aviva off of the cliff. Discussion is brief, positive, and jovial.
The next morning is Carole’s day to plan. She has a mani-pedi station and a couple of massage tables set up at the villa. The ladies slowly trickle in. Sonja has bruises all over her from kissing the ground while she and Tomas humpty danced in the garden–the night after Lu, as Ramona clarifies.
At this spot on the map, you need to bend down and kiss the ground. I’ll be right behind you.
Everyone’s in a funk–why?–but Carole wants to go for drinks before Russ’ concert. Lu and RamonJa ride in one vehicle. Ramona thinks Aviva’s acting like something out of Planet of the Apes and needs an exorcism. In the vehicle with Heather and Carole, Aviva tells Heather that she’s stronger than Aviva is for being able to handle Ramona.
We’re going to need to arrange for an exorcism.
At the bar, Lu toasts to Aviva surviving the worst flight known to mankind and arriving safely. Next stop, the concert, one of the main reasons for the trip.
Somewhere along the way, the car with RamonJa veers off track and they return to the villa so that they can pack…and drink…a lot. One topic of conversation is Aviva’s being fake with them and her agoraphobia, homophobia, every sort of phobia. You name it, she’s it-phobic.
I ain’t having no polk salad! It’s corn dog or nothing.
The rest of the ladies return early from the concert for dinner. One of the cameramen must love Sonja’s cooleyhopper, because we get The Tourist Tomas’ view of it. RamonJa are in rough shape and not too interested in partying, but now Aviva is! Where’s everybody going?
There’s some memo confusion because Ramona doesn’t know anything about the concert being a big part of the trip. Memos get lost or pinot-logged. Shit happens. RamonJa is drunk and goofing off in the room while dinner is served. In a camera interview, Aviva calls Sonja a legend in her own mind and reminds her of Anna Nicole Smith because she married an old, wealthy man and rode a fast spiral down after her fortune slipped through her fingers. Again, why did she try to set up her father with Sonja if she feels that way?
I’ve been blow drying myself with it set on high. I AM a hot mess!