Real Housewives of NYC Recap: Whole Lotta Dissin’ Goin’ On

Recaps

By BelowSeaLevel | Wednesday, June 27, 2012 | 11:00 am | 20 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Real Housewives of NYC, Recaps

With some coffee and Know Your Enemy playing in my head, let’s get going with this week’s episode.  Aviva and Carole are meeting Ramona for lunch, talking about their breakfast during their walk.  When Aviva says she has one hard-boiled egg every day, I picture her trekking off to Rich Wakile’s Jersey gas station for her daily fix.  Wouldn’t they make an interesting couple?

Carole and Aviva arrive to find Ramona getting a head start with the pinot and greeting them with gifts–her skin care products.  Hope she remembered to include some deodorant since that always makes for a great gift, too.  Well, at least Kim Zolciak’s mom would have loved that as a gift.

Wait, this stuff was tested on warthogs?

 

Sonja couldn’t make it, so it’s just the three of them.  Hmmm…wonder where Sonja is?  When they ask if Heather and LuAnn will be joining them, Ramona launches into her real purpose of lunch–to diss LuAnn and Heather.  It’s more of the same crap, so that frees us up to admire Carole’s fur ball purse on the table.  If you watch closely, you can see it breathe.  Oh, look, it’s pooping coins!

Carole introduces the ladies to her new product targeted at busy women–Purse Pets.  No feeding required!

 

While Ramona is blabbering on about Chattie Heatherie, Carole accidentally lets the original, never-before-heard bombshell slip that Heather talks too much.  I’m not so sure she meant that as much as she was just going along with the conversation.  Carole squirms, but there’s no way Pinot For Brains is going to let that go unnoticed, forcing her to repeat it to Ramona’s liking.  Lunch is taking a little longer than expected and leads to Ramona and Carole doing some sort of bunny hand dance moves.  Or maybe it’s French sign language.

Okay, you two.  Get a bunny hutch already, will ya?

 

We learn that Carole loves her pasta and that Ramona will be meeting Heather for drinks later.  Ramona doesn’t think she’ll be able to get a word in, which leads to Carole suggesting a “talking intervention” for Heatherie.  Ramona loves the idea of a bedazzled bandana, while Carole takes it up a notch by suggesting a ball gag.  Now where did that come from–is she dom or sub–enquiring kinks will want to know?  Everyone else, not so much.  Normally, interventions with ball gags end poorly or at least messily, but please do it ’cause we love train wrecks.

I kept trying to tell Heather how long I boil my eggs–like 75 times–but she just kept yammering about organ transplants.  

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Living in New Orleans, it helps to be a good swimmer.  

 

 

 

20 Comments

  1. 1
    Surly Girly Surly Girly
    Posted June 27, 2012 at 11:59 am

    The franchise has become such a yawn fest that I stopped watching this episode after the first 10 minutes. All three of the newbies are visually interchangeable to the point where I can’t keep them sorted out. What a shame – the RHONY used to be my hands-down favorite – now it’s my thumbs-down worst.

    Love the recaps, though – so will continue to keep up to date here. Thanks for the laughs!

  2. 2
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted June 27, 2012 at 12:10 pm

    I’m with you Surly Girl. RHNY was definitely one of my favorites of the franchise, but honestly all they have these season is the drama between Ramona and Heather which could all go away if she’d invited Ramona to London. They are trying to build on a bunch of nothingness…

    Why can’t Carole be more immature and throw her princess status in Lu’s face?

    Why can’t Aviva be more angry that all these women have slept with her man?

    Why can’t Sonja have a drunken night with some hot painter person?

    If would have been much more fun if Heather had not invited both Luann and Ramona. At least with two people left behind they would band together and talk about the other one.

    It has potential but they are not taking advantage.

  3. 3
    featherhead
    Posted June 27, 2012 at 2:08 pm

    Where did you find that picture of Vickie in the fur coat? I thought she had returned it?
    Wow, Lu (I love it when you call me Lu) was totally trying to turn Sonja against the Moana, not very Countess of you, Lu!

  4. 4
    hot cawfee
    Posted June 27, 2012 at 2:35 pm

    What a great recap !!!!!! I am stickin’ with these crazy gals for the duration.
    Ramona– hon (rubbing my face with my hands)– you are in the early stages of menopause–For you we can call it “Pinot-pause”–sure we can and why not? Please get some meds–just a little pill here or there to chill you out.
    OK– am armed now to watch the episode in total—
    Oh– isnt Ramona going to be on Lawn Gisland to push her wine at a liquor store???

  5. 5
    labowner
    Posted June 27, 2012 at 2:46 pm

    Obviously Andy is a bright bulb, but I think they made a huge mistake in starting this series while the other two were in full drama mode, which makes NYC look tame in comparison. I believe if we started watching when OC and NJ were over, it wouldn’t seem so “boring”. I don’t mind the normalcy on here. It is quite refreshing. Better than watching the same old arguments year after year.

  6. 6
    2muchbravo
    Posted June 27, 2012 at 10:03 pm

    OMG your captions are hysterical! Great recap!

  7. 7
    2muchbravo
    Posted June 27, 2012 at 10:05 pm

    Forgot to mention that Carole gave a good explanation of the 99% thing that she and Tripp went to. She seems pretty down-to-earth and it quite witty.

  8. 8
    Beyoncca
    Posted June 27, 2012 at 10:24 pm

    Wow ! What Ramona said about Sonja was ridiculous. Who ruins their best friends party, by dwelling and agonizing over not being invited to an event. Sonja needs to grow a backbone and stand up to Ramona. If Sonja wanted to go on the trip why would Ramona want to take that away from her.

  9. 9
    cloudsinmycoffee
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 6:20 am

    Ramoana has evolved into a functioning alcoholic. As time goes on, she’s become more abrasive and less fun. I don’t think we’ll ever get Turtle Time again.

    I think Sonja handled Alkamoana very well, once anything gets that rabid, you’re supposed to talk softly and calmly with your hands safely in the air. Sonja knows her friend was drunk so there was really no reason to argue with her.

    Aviva and her one expression face is beginning to get on my nerves. Her one expressioned face and her monotone voice really is annoying, but her babies are waaay adorable.

    Carole is hilarious and her sitting back and watching the madness amongst the women makes me laugh. I like her.
    Heather’s snide face makes me want to kick her in the dummy tummy.

    LuAnn is fucking delusional if she thinks she can get pregnant. Hint sweetie, after menopause you can’t get pregnant.

  10. 10
    Mimo
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 6:25 am

    I don’t know. When you have a group of six people, and five of them are going on a trip, with the sixth intentionally omitted, I’d be pretty upset too. Throw some alcohol in the mix and I could see me causing a scene at my friend’s party.

    Carole is a stitch. When she was on WWHL and Andy asked her if she was team Tre or tean Jaq – she said she was Team Rosie!

  11. 11
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 6:55 am

    @ Mimo, I agree. How do you invite all but one person? All over something said at a party after a few cocktails.

  12. 12
    Sunshine
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 3:01 pm

    @11 – Classy – I will tell you how….the producers most likely told her not to so there would be major Ramona back lash and make the season less boring.

    Just like on mob wives when we found out the producer had told the girls not to let Carla know how sick Renee was so Renee could go ape shit about it during the beginning of the season.

    I also agree with the above poster who said that Ramona has become a functioning alkie.

    Lab…you are right….too many shows on at the same time….which shows us too many franchises and he wants to add even more? Greedy. If people did not have the ability to record these shows they would never be able to leave their sets to do anything else for half the week..

    I still intend to watch the full season of NY though….because I couldn’t stand Jill and Kelly so much I refuse to help lower any ratings LOL

  13. 13
    labowner
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 4:48 pm

    Sunshine after watching the very refreshing Vancouver series, I am liking the non-aggression so far. With out the fighting from the other ladies, Ramona looks that much crazier.

  14. 14
    Adelefig
    Posted June 28, 2012 at 9:15 pm

    I just finished reading Carole’s book “What Remains.” She has more substance that most of the housewives in any franchise. I wonder if she will let herself be lowered down to the other women? She was a journalist for 15 years at ABC , worked with Peter Jennings, etc. Why on
    Earth she agreed to be on this series is beyond me.

  15. 15
    MrsMiaWallace MrsMiaWallace
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 4:05 am

    @Adelefig – that is exactly why I reserve judgement on Carol. I am loving her as much as anyone but its a catch 22 inverse of the Groucho Marx saying “I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member”. What is her malfunction and when do we get to see it?

    I loved the recap! Great Ramotional pics and yes I believe some mood altering medication could go a long way with her.

    Ramona did the wrong thing but the thing no one can admit is this isn’t a group of Heather’s girlfriends, its the cast of a show she’s paid to be on. They keep saying “the girls” but really mean “the cast” and the trip is “a plot line”. It is less like having a minor friend/acquaintance in your circle not invite you to something (stings but suck it up) and more like a coworker in a small office organizing a work-related field trip and excluding you.

  16. 16
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 4:19 am

    @labowner that make sense. They knew something like this would drive Ramona over the edge and I guess they think that’s what we want to see. Every show has to have a villain and with Jill out of the picture I guess they are shooting for Ramona to be the new villain.

  17. 17
    hot cawfee
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 5:41 am

    @14 Adele– its a great book isnt it??? I love Carole’s phrase–”tragedy whores”– for people who intrude into the grief and drama of the death of someone/s and turn into something very selfserving. I have adopted it for my own use and use it freely–my m-in-law is the biggest TW going. After 9-11 you’d think she was related to half the people who died (were murdered).

  18. 18
    labowner
    Posted June 29, 2012 at 10:08 am

    MsMia Carole seems to me like the try anything once, what is it going to hurt kind of person. I am sure the contracts are for one year. What’s a few months out of your life to gain some appreciation and perspective for what you are and have?

  19. 19
    hot cawfee
    Posted July 1, 2012 at 8:38 am

    @18 Lab– right–and Carole is also looking to finish and market her book. Not judging her for that of course—these chicks are all looking to push product

  20. 20
    FuriousFlipper
    Posted July 9, 2012 at 9:32 pm

    You know, read the first couple of comments here about this new season and had to agree….I remember being blown away by RHNY two seasons back – the whole Bethenny/Jill saga – the pain – the tears – and just thinking that “Wow, it doesn’t get any better.” And it was beautifully edited and shot, to boot. Okay, I may have been smoking the ganja a bit back then, but still. And then read the other reasonable comments that point out that perhaps it was a bad time to start this series – while two others are just out there with the glamdrama. Anyway, just watching this episode now. Leading up to Ramona’s meltdown. And yes, agree with another reasonable voice here – being excluded, especially when you’ve seen most of your “friends” get tossed out and all the newbies come in – may tend to make a pinot grigio addict a little frantic. Anyway, I read the recap before the show. And thanks so much. Really? Are there funnier and more clever writers anywhere else on the whole GD internet. I GD think not. Love TV Gasm. Raise a glass. And I’m off the pot but on the PG tonight. :)

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