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Millsaps brings Sonja her breakfast in bed and vitamins. If you’ve ever had a pet prescribed medications, you’ll recognize the blue bottles. Well, Sonja recognized that Millsaps had her dog’s bottle of liver pills mixed in with her vitamins and is not thrilled, no matter how appropriate it may have been. Millsaps better get it together or she’ll be finding another Saluki-in-heat’s leaking palace covered with pet hair to call home.
They go over Sonja’s schedule for the day. This leads to a discussion that Sonja never checks voice mails, so she decides to change her message to one telling people not to leave messages…unless they’re royalty. She practices her message over and over and over because she’s a busy single mom with hurricane damages in her home, a dog that got hit by a car, clogged toilets, doing her own electrical work, changing light bulbs, and…designing a toaster oven. Voice mail is hard, y’all!
Heather is still waiting to hear whether or not Aviva will be joining her in London. They meet up and Heather learns more about Aviva’s phobias when she needs to hold Aviva’s hand in the elevator. It’s obvious that Aviva will be extremely uncomfortable during the flight to London, so she breaks the news to Heather. For some reason, Aviva has joined forces with Ramona to get her invited to London. Unfortunately for Ramona and Aviva, Heather is gangsta chic and don’t play dat.
Sonja is on the cover of Social Life Magazine, so they are hosting a launch party for her, and all of the housewives and househusbands are invited. Mary-O grabs Reid’s left hand when he sees him, saying he’s heard a rumor…oops, that wedding ring was a secret, big mouth. Mario feels the wrath of Ramona’s death stare.
Poor Mario just had to blab the secret, but now Aviva knows she can’t share anything with Ramona Grigio. When the countess and Jacques meet up with Princess Carole, Jacques asks her if she’s been to Take-ses–Texas–because they just met someone from there who’s dating royalty. Carole says during a camera interview that LuAnn has Royal Tourettes Syndrome, which is an apt description since LuAnn drops names of European royalty like Carole’s Tribble purse turds pennies and quarters.
Trouble is brewing, as Ramona is already inebriating and Heather isn’t nibbling on the bait that Ramona is casting. For goodness sake, Ramona even says she’s going to come out with a red wine for Heather and INVITE her to the launch of it…and she’s going to INVITE Aviva…and maybe she’ll even INVITE the husbands…Ramona likes to INVITE everyone…when she INVITED Heather to her house for dinner, Heather was still INVITED even though her husband couldn’t make it. Heather, being so damn gangsta chic, is a cool cat with a hot gat–she’s done with inviting and moving on to inciting.
Ramona is WASTED. She’s saying “invited” as much as she’s saying “another glass of pinot.” When Ramona asks Aviva if she picked up on her hints, Aviva has a hard time keeping a straight face, since Ramona is nothing short of a desperate, frantic human JumboTron flashing “INVITE ME!”
Aviva should know better than to argue with someone with a blood alcohol level of 99%. Aviva encourages Ramona to talk to Heather to find out what Ramona did that is stopping Heather from inviting her. Ramona insists that there is NO WAY she did ANYTHING to offend Heather.
Now Sonja is brought into it when she acknowledges that she heard Ramona wasn’t invited, but that’s too bad ’cause Sonja’s already packing her bags. Ramona is pissed in every sense of the word.