Real World Recap: Swift’s Anatomy

Recaps

By VirginiaApple | Tuesday, July 24, 2012 | 9:29 am | 21 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Real World, Recaps

Swift wants to move it, but Ginger thinks it’s safe hiding in RomCom’s kayak.  Moments later, Marie is dumping the fish back into the water and Swift jumps in to try to save it.  Marie yells to Latoya to help shove the fish out to sea and it’s pure chaos.

Please note that Swift is saying this while Latoya is nowhere near him.  This will be important later.

Anyway, in the chaos, Swift is trying to get out of the water while Latoya is trying to knock the fish back in.  Swift proceeds to yell at her for knocking him and his fucked up foot back into the water, and Latoya is pissed that he’s trying to blame her when he shouldn’t have jumped into that particular part of the water without protective shoes to begin with.  (At this point I was distracted thinking about the extensive safety lectures the roomies must have gotten when they moved in, and how impressive it is that some of them seemed to pay some sort of attention.)

So, Swift is in a lot of pain and can barely make it out of the water.  Ginger has to throw Swift over his shoulder and carry him back up to the house.  Why is Swift in so much pain?

Because the dumbass stepped on THIS.  HOLY SHIT.

Swift and Ginger are discussing his injury when Marie comes over to apologize.  Swift is still blaming Latoya for (from what we saw) taking more than 10 seconds to realize what was going on in the chaos of everyone screaming.  That… bitch?  Marie tries to defend Latoya, but Swift claims he just wants her to own up to it.  Whatever it is.

Marie, being Marie, suggests the all-natural remedy of rum.  They offer to pull whatever’s stuck in his foot out once he passes out.  Cue montage of drinking, interrupted when RomCom tears herself away from Trey long enough to ask “Swifty” what happened in her baby voice.  He tries to give her credit for the prank, but she immediately insists that it wasn’t her.  Marie is still playing her innocent game, so this leads to Latoya getting blamed.

Latoya, meanwhile, is recounting the events for her mother, who advises her to walk away from the situation since neither party is going to back down. 

The other roomies have called Lee the boat captain over to examine the situation.  He recommends peeing on Swifts foot.  All of the other roomies are more than willing to do the urinating, but Swift is unwilling to be on the receiving end.

But Swift!  How often in life do you have such a golden opportunity to re-enact a Friends episode?

Get it?  Golden opportunity?  Lee ends up recommending a trip to the doctor, prompting Marie to declare “It’s all fun and games until someone gets hurt.  Then it’s even funnier.”  Ginger attempt to take charge, which is adorable, getting Swift his stuff and asking where his wallet is.  Swift says he didn’t bring his insurance card, but insists that they’ll be able to look it up at the doctor’s office.  So… he’s not bringing his wallet with him to the doctor at all.  Ginger offers to carry Swift, but that makes him feel like too much of a bitch even though he respects the offer. 

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21 Comments

  1. 1
    Laurenb52
    Posted July 24, 2012 at 11:55 am

    From browsing both Latoya and Swift’s twitter timelines the fight is STILL going on. He also did an after show ustream where he said Latoya wasn’t pretty and was a loud mouth while he sat between the legs of various girls sitting behind him (seems he’s trying to push that player image). My initial annoyance with this guy has matured into dislike but we’ll see how the rest of the season goes

  2. 2
    beachgal
    Posted July 24, 2012 at 1:13 pm

    I love this season. They are so much fun. I liked Vegas as well. But I can’t even remember the location of the last season. They were a bore.

  3. 3
    JudgyWudgy
    Posted July 24, 2012 at 1:13 pm

    Come on, no one notices Marie slip effortlessly from adamantly blaming RomCom to insisting she saw and remembers Captain Needy being the culprit? NO ONE? They’re making this way too easy for her.

  4. 4
    Moli Moli
    Posted July 24, 2012 at 4:25 pm

    squeals@the shoutout! Thank you@JudgyWudgy, she point blank blamed RomCom and no one remembered. Marie says ‘oh yea we know it was you…we even encouraged you’, the hell???? The foot thing only got confusing when Swift blamed LaToya, I sat here looking at the screen saying out loud “how is this her fault’? I have never seen a more irrational person than Swift, LaToya took all of the blame that she had NO business taking.
    Thankfully we were only limited to 2 and a half(baby talking Swift) moments of every spinster in Americas’ genre of film. She is so exhausting how could anyone be in a relationship with this girl? Mooshymooshy talk to an iguana(ew)… it was understandable with that little lizard(ew) she found the first day.

    I like Ginger and Marie(she’s a crafty one) they are cute together. When Captian Needy isn’t being…needy he’s an OK guy, did you catch him asking Swift what kind of drugs he was prescribed? I hope Swift lied when he said it was only over the counter meds ONLY to give him a redeeming moment this episode.

  5. 5
    Gypsy Gypsy
    Posted July 24, 2012 at 7:35 pm

    I just caught up, I can barely pay attention. I really wish they were on the bigger island. TY as always VA!

  6. 6
    carol
    Posted July 24, 2012 at 10:43 pm

    Did anyone else get the impression that Latoya’s mom was making the situation worse than it really was. There was something in her tone that was off. Also, Latoya and Swift were both acting like little kids with huge egos. It was Swift’s fault but Latoya was acting like it was actually her fault but she didn’t want to own up to it. If Latoya hadn’t walked away and just helped Swift it would have been over in 5 minutes.

    Swift is a tiny man. Standing next to Ginger he looked like a 6 year old.

    A great ending to this episode would have been if the roommates had gone out for dinner and they had ordered sea urchin.

  7. 7
    jerseyj
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 6:08 am

    1) I am firmly team LaToya…she didn’t do anything wrong! She didn’t start the prank, she didn’t make Swift jump in the water on the sea urchins, she even went to the doctor with him and offered to pay for it! The only mistake she made was trying to reason with a drunk person…that never ends well! She should have waited until after he slept it off.

    2) So glad to have an almost RomCom free episode!

  8. 8
    considerthis
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 7:30 am

    Deep question
    How does an Iguana end up on an island? Was it born there? OR Did Farrah purchase it at the St. Thomas Petsmart and then after Sophia painted it with nail polish decide it was too much for her and just carelessly release it??

  9. 9
    Gypsy Gypsy
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 7:51 am

    I think they can swing @considerthis.

    http://www.vinow.com/articles/031709/iguanas.php

  10. 10
    considerthis
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 8:11 am

    Thx Gypsy – good 2 know :)

  11. 11
    Gypsy Gypsy
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 8:49 am

    I mean swim! Oh lord my typos! *facepalm*

  12. 12
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 9:20 am

    Thankfully you corrected your self b/c I was going to be very concerned if iguanas were swinging around.

  13. 13
    Gypsy Gypsy
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 9:38 am

    Or, if they themselves were swingers.

    Holy shit, I can be a hot typo mess, LMAO

  14. 14
    captain save-uh-ho
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 9:51 am

    Personally, I prefer swinging Iguanas!

  15. 15
    plockeness monster plockeness monster
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 4:10 pm

    This episode fucking sucked. Thank you for making the recap sooooo much better than the actual show, VA. There’s usually one or two a season, and this is only the third episode!!!

  16. 16
    plockeness monster plockeness monster
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 4:31 pm

    If my foot was hurting, I would let any of my roommates pee on it. I would let the boat guy pee on it. Anything to stop the pain. I agree, too much Swift this episode. It was probably because he was drunk but still…awful.

    I don’t like RomCom.

    Team LaToya, I guess. But I’m biased because she’s my fav

    I’m ready for a Captain melt down!!!!

  17. 17
    captain save-uh-ho
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 8:04 pm

    The location SUCKS. I think this cast would have so much more potential in a big city. The kids have a “curfew” for production reasons and had to be back before the party even begins in Island Time. Not sure the logistics were really thought out that well.
    At least in Vegas- despite the curfew, the kids got to stay out later as long as they were in the casino that was in there hotel…so basically they could hang out all night.
    Also, way easier to bring potential hookups home when all you have to do is take the elevator up to the room.
    This location is stifling them. Totally sucks balls.
    I did think it was highlarious when Marie convinced Captain that he was the one who pulled the prank.

  18. 18
    VunterSlaush VunterSlaush
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 8:32 pm

    @ Captain

    I think ‘the Swinging Iguana’ would also make a great name for a bar.

  19. 19
    captain save-uh-ho
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 9:14 pm

    @VunterSlaush… I would definitely hang out at that bar. I wonder what sort of specialty drink The Swinging Iguana would have…

  20. 20
    jennnifer newlond
    Posted August 26, 2012 at 4:10 pm

    Marie is the biggest bitch. She treats ginger and the whole House like shit. And no wonder ginger is so sctewed up. She messes with his head and basiclly tells him he is not a man about anythin and in her words thats ” not a good look”. Whats not a goodlook is her she looks about 50 with all that drinking she is rude and feeds off other peoples problems and if I was New Jersey I would be embaressed to be from the same place. She was born without sesitivity and compassion gene and its sad how she treats other people espesially ginger. The only genes she was born with is the ME ME ME gene. So Sad!

  21. 21
    JudgyWudgy
    Posted August 26, 2012 at 5:01 pm

    She’s from Staten Island.

    I’m super confused by people who choose to hate Marie when they have the option of Trey and/or Laura. Yeah, her personality is an acquired taste but I by far find her to be the lesser of all evils.

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