Recap: Beverly Hills Nannies

After Eva Braun leaves with some remark about getting drunk, Ari asks the gals to put Emma down.  Why do parents always say “put down”?  Cause that means kill.  Why do parents not say “put to bed”?  Where does “put down” come from?  Kristin sits in a chair observing Amber.  I’m not sure what the purpose of the “putting down” is.  Is it just to get the kid in bed?  Cause, check.  Is it to get the kid to sleep?  You can’t force a kid to sleep.  So whatever it is Amber was supposed to do, I can’t tell if she did it properly.  Kristin doesn’t think so, but she’s got it in for Amber for some reason – we’ll see why later.

Commercial.

We’re back to Ari asking Amber to pick up dog poo, complaining about the smell, and going on an extended monologue about various kinds of poo and how she doesn’t like to – and doesn’t have to – deal with it.  I wonder how she uses the toilet?  Does she have someone just to wipe her?

Commercial.

It’s game night at Shaun’s uncle’s place in Manhattan Beach.  Pretty much everyone but Amber is there.  Kristin says she sees a change in the way all the nannies treat her – except Amber.  Oh, so Amber doesn’t kiss your royal ass, is that it?  You’re so not all that and a bag of chips, chica.

Over to Shayla, who says the gals are unhappy with Kristin’s remark from last week about Amber being unattractive.  Drunky says Kristin frequently criticizes others’ appearance.  Kristin says she’s not happy with Amber asking her to sub on Saturday, plus she “doesn’t know how to put a kid down”.  And you were a big help there.

Kristin and Shayla chat, and Kristin calls Amber old.  Shaun comes over and asks if Kristin’s drinking too much.  Kristin says she’s a “responsible partier”, and repeats the comment she made last week about Amber.

Looking a little old yourself, dear.

Meanwhile, Lil Drunky is confused.

What is this, a chip?  What’s it made out of?  Is this food?  Are there directions?  I can boil water.

Everyone gathers to tell stories.  Amanda says she once went to a basement and found the dad of the house “banging someone”.  When she told the wife – told the wife?  Are you freaking insane? – the wife said she, too, had a bit on the side.  Wow, that’s so funny.  Not.

Luckily that depressing anecdote ends, and Amber shows up.  AMBER ALERT!  HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH  Shayla pulls her aside and repeats Kristin’s remark.  Amber says to consider the source and seems to shrug it off.

Amber then repeatedly tries to talk to Kristin about the next day (wedding day) but they’re either interrupted or Kristin is doing something else staggering around drinking even more.  Kristin is amazingly drunk by this point.  It has to be at least midnight already, and presumably she has to be at Ari’s pretty early the next day, right?  I envisage a haggard Kristin the next day.