Recap: Beverly Hills Nannies – Nanny War Part I

She tells Amanda that Justin couldn’t change a diaper, then goes on to say bundle of joy bit her on the teats. 

Both of ‘em!  Like I’m some kind of cow!

When Amanda shares her mad breast-milk-management skillz with Heifer, we see Heifer warming towards her.  Remember, Heifer’s breast milk is “gold”, or so she tells us. 

I’d be more impressed if Heifer’s output was chocolate.

Over at Joely’s, where Tricia is yet again dumping her kid on her sister.  Lucy’s back and says to Tricia that she took in what Tricia said the other day. 

I wanted to talk to you to tell you when you told me about talking too much, I totally got it.

Tricia now loses all my respect, as she not only believes Lucy’s statement but then says she now knows Lucy is the right nanny for her family. 

Maybe you can talk some sense into her, Obi-Wan.

Commercial.  We return (briefly) to Justin and one of the Faulk girls doing manicures.  Cute!

Commercial.  And we’re back to Gloria Allred’s newest client – very soon, anyway – Scott, who is now being sexually harassed by Cindy.  She’s smashing cake all over his bare chest, face and back and chasing him.  Cindy clearly thinks Scott wants her.  I want an anti-emetic.  STAT.

Meanwhile, Amanda is in her car and gets a call from Heifer and Kyri (Eleison, on the highway in the night), who say they’re going to hire her.  “How hard can it be”, wonders Hick Town’s most famous resident. . .

In a bar (bien sur!) Kristin is joined by Lil’ Drunky, who broke up with somebody named Brian.  Drunky says she has “nothing”.  No you don’t, honey.  You have Jack.  And Jim.  And that Russian guy, Stoli. 

And he’s brought his family!  How sweet.

Kristin says Drunky is a mess and to fix that, tells Drunky they’re going to Lucy’s party.  Great strategy – everyone knows alcohol is just the thing to fix up a depressed drunk!

At the Faulks, Lindsay is telling Justin he has to learn to golf and swim because they are a country club family.  Justin is angsting about meeting Marshall Faulk soon and not measuring up in golf.  Much less swimming, which Justin also doesn’t do.   Lindsay shares it will be a problem if he doesn’t learn.  Ah, heavy-handed foreshadowing.

Commercial.  We return to the last 6 minutes of the ep, which are the so-called “nanny war”.  Lucy has inexplicably brought her mother to this party – or on second thought, I bet mom is paying. 

Mom needs her bifocal prescription adjusted.  They’re cupcakes, mom.