The challenge is to create a pattern (not a textile afterall, dammit I wanted to see them using looms!) and use it in a fashion that is all somehow connected to their cultural heritage. Great for the people of accents and color but what do us white people have? I’m seventh generation American, do I make a burger and fries pattern?
God shed his grace on thee
So the workroom door opens and its family time! Everyone is squealing and crying and even Dmitry breaks down. Sonjia, Christopher, Tara Reid, Skunk and Elena get their mothers, Unibrow has his storage unit boyfriend, Blorpheus has a sister who he loves but could never design for and Dmitry has his oldest and dearest friend. I guess in Communist Russia you visit family, family does not visit you.
I love her necklace and I’m jealous knowing he has designed for her before
Everyone is looking at old photos and Dmitry has some hostage footage of his dad in Belarus where his family is being held ransom. Apparently his dad is an artist but the real money will be from Grandpa who is a “big artist”. I think that means he paints 30 foot canvases of Pussy Riot.
Skunk is emotional because he loves and depends so much on his family, especially since he was bullied so badly in school. He is just riding that public opinion roller coaster up and up and up these days. I hope there’s one spectacular bitch meltdown in store for us because I’m starting to forget what my problem with him ever was.
I think he was bullied for being Adam Lambert before there was an Adam Lambert. Kids take copyright infringement seriously.
Elena is also touching in her emotional reunion. Her mother is tiny and a good indication that lovely Elena will age well if people around her don’t murder her and toss her body off a bridge first.
I don’t think this tiny white-haired pixie is going to offer much protection
The mums and sisters and boyfriends and pals are helping out and everyone is doing well and seems more relaxed having an advocate in the room. Christopher is struggling a little since he hates working with patterns, but most are on track. Unibrow is just scribbling everywhere and Tara apparently has Polish roots she wants to draw from. Dmitry wants to use a lot of Belarus colors to appease the kidnappers and Skunk wants to represent the time he hunted down and killed a bird in the backyard as a kid. Blorpheus likes flowers since the Indian religion has many flower symbols, and also Make it a Flower is the only trick he knows.
A fat girl in a black muumuu, I guess she’s been taking fashion advice from her brother
They break from their loved ones to shop and at Mood Blorpheus is his usual self, pooting and polluting the store with his crankypants attitude. Elena is elated and literally skipping around the store. Apparently her normal attitude is sunny and cheerful and having Mom around has rejuvenated her.
I guess it’s dad we can blame for the psychotic rages then
In the room everyone is giddy and we find out that somehow “equestrian” is a root of Skunk’s and ladybugs killed Christopher’s grandmother. Blorpheus says he is going to do something unexpected, so he’s either going to skip pleating this time or go on a diet. Dmitry is going for seperates since he was scolded last time for always creating dresses. He deadpans to us yet another talking head classic.
“Guess what people? I’m making seperates, ooooh”
Since the design has to be printed out on fabric I’m thinking this will be a slightly more leisurely challenge for once. At the end of the first day the team goes home to find dinner being served by their visiting loved one. Tara Reid’s dad came too, thinking this was Intervention. Finally.
The next day they are back in the workroom unwrapping the prints they created. Apparently that is like Christmas for a designer. Christopher keeps the Great Twin Swap going by examining every pattern in the room and explaining how they are inferior. Dmitry has a cowboy hanky, Tara has a luau skirt (I miss Hawaii!), Elena has chaotic scribbles and …. then he is finally verklempt at Unibrow’s homage to humpage.
He really went literal with the concept of “where you came from”
Skunk and Christopher compliment each other as they fuse into one. They are also both struggling with this challenge and hating their own prints and designs. They should focus and tell Sonjia to find a new shade of lipstick.
Or stop giving blowjobs to the pink panther
Tim Gunn comes in to duck-duck-goose everyone’s ego and he really out-Gunns himself by telling Blorpheus his pleated flower splotch abortion dress looks like a bunch of used tampons. LOL! Of course Tim Gunn says “an homage to a menstrual cycle”. Even when he’s crass he is all class.
“So that would make me 14 years old when I became a woman”