Skunk really gets it with all five barrels. He first explains his bullying struggle and how he strangled a bird in the backyard to come to terms with the cruelty of children, but that hot topic storyline is not enough to distract the judges from basic bad fashion. They all hit on the things I thought as it walked the runway: juniors’ section at TJ Max, depressing theme and the print comes out cartoonish and busy. Skunk is predictably defensive and offended that pouring his heart out into a jacket is not being well received but sometimes being literal is not the way to go new friend.
Sonjia has swapped out one unfortunate lipstick for another but is getting high praise from the judges. The black top is praised, the ability to have an outrageous print in the long pant is praised and the fit is praised. Even Mondo says it’s pretty good as though someone in the world cares.
Chris is up and the main problem is that he covered his ladybug/heart print with a sheer black organza. Or maybe all organza is sheer, I know nothing about fabrics. His dress is called expected and prom-ish. Doesn’t sound like he is going home, but he has nothing to be proud of.But will she be able to go to the prom with Jesse?
Kors shows no sign of ever having read Tvgasm based on the amount of self tanner he uses each week. Watching him is almost painful and I tend to tab over to other screens when he is talking. He lays out great snark and clever analogies but his face looks like two blue and white marbles pressed into a big wad of orange chewing gum.
“You should see me before I’ve had my coffee!”
The judges deliberate and want to send Blorpheus AND Skunk home. Although Blorpheus is a better talent, the judges are tormented by the continual pleating and bring out Tim Gunn to ask whyhe didn’t scold Blorpheus over this repetition. Tim repeats his new catchphrase and says that the image of ladyblood distracted him from the age-old sin of a one way monkey this time. He then swoops out like a superhero and I have a sudden image of how he would stride off after our hot tub party-suit still immaculate and inexplicably dry.
“This is my bathing suit”
Dmitry takes the win and proves that Mondo’s scorecard was just an etch-a-sketch. Sonjia looks pained as she received praise from everyone and didn’t realize Mondo and Anya were just in the neighborhood with nothing better to do. Dmitry reacts gracefully and sweetly and then he proves he’s an angel of darkness by marking the doomed one.
“It will be painless my friend”
So of course, Skunk is out and Blorpheus is safe. Blorpheus does that thing where he is an awful human being and just has to make a comment and act ungracious even though this moment really isn’t about him. He says he is a great designer and doesn’t want to do something easy but will listen and his work will reflect his critiques.