Time travel four weeks later! Tim first heads to Massapequa, NY to visit Christopher. Seeing Tim Gunn walk down a suburban street festooned with minivans and overlaid with the sound of geese honking is pretty hilarious.
“Is that mediocrity I smell?”
Chris is living in his parents’ house designing out of his mom’s knick-knack room.
“Please warn me if the Precious Moments figurines start coming to life”
Chris appears to be highly organized and largely finished. The inspiration for the design is an old x-ray of his mother’s spine after a car accident. I am skeptical at this kind of cheesy literality, but there was not much time for inspiration and the pattern actually comes out nicely. He has a lot of variety and good detailing. I love the jacket that is all held together with silver pins. There is a lot of leather and dark/dull colors, but it is cohesive. Tim especially likes the leather that is distressed by bleach. Good to know for my next laundry mishap!
Thank God his dog wasn’t recently neutered
Overall, Tim gives Chris a great review and just tells him to add some wow factor to a few of the pieces. They head upstairs where the whole family is hand-wringing and cutely nervous to meet Tim. I find this part so adorable it reminds of the time I used to like Christopher and think he was a sweet little angel. The mother has purchased every variety of pastry from the nearby bakery and Tim praises the effort as “very… caloric”. They all laugh and Chris makes that face you make when you’re an adult and your mom is trying really hard and you are embarrassed but no longer an asshole teenager so you’re mostly just amused and a little pitying.
Also on the menu, milk!
Christopher has his mom and dad present, what I guess is two younger sisters and another guy who is a gay hipster complete with original Bieber hair. I have to wonder how many gay sons this pastry addict raised when we discover it’s actually Christopher’s boyfriend. Statistically, that makes more sense. They all tease a little and say Chris is flamboyant and dramatic but the parents seem really proud of him and supportive. Nice family!
Also nice: Making your parents perch awkwardly on the ottoman!
Next up is Unibrow. He is in NYC sketching away on his HP thingy. Gotta justify that sponsor money! I guess Tim is not getting many frequent flyer points this season. Unibrow’s boyfriend is present and Unibrow is nervous. Maybe it’s from living indoors lately or maybe it’s that his designs look like pastel bed sheets so far. One thing he isn’t nervous about? Grossing Tim out with his digs! Tim was expecting to finally figure out the mystery of what the inside of Oscar’s can really looks like, so he is taken aback to find himself on the set of Million Dollar Listing NY.
Looks like the owner can afford to get the homeless smell cleaned out too