Recap: Project Runway: Hometown Dates


By MrsMiaWallace | | 6:20 pm | 21 Comments

Time travel four weeks later! Tim first heads to Massapequa, NY to visit Christopher. Seeing Tim Gunn walk down a suburban street festooned with minivans and overlaid with the sound of geese honking is pretty hilarious.

 “Is that mediocrity I smell?”

Chris is living in his parents’ house designing out of his mom’s knick-knack room.

 “Please warn me if the Precious Moments figurines start coming to life”

Chris appears to be highly organized and largely finished. The inspiration for the design is an old x-ray of his mother’s spine after a car accident. I am skeptical at this kind of cheesy literality, but there was not much time for inspiration and the pattern actually comes out nicely. He has a lot of variety and good detailing. I love the jacket that is all held together with silver pins. There is a lot of leather and dark/dull colors, but it is cohesive. Tim especially likes the leather that is distressed by bleach. Good to know for my next laundry mishap!

Thank God his dog wasn’t recently neutered

Overall, Tim gives Chris a great review and just tells him to add some wow factor to a few of the pieces. They head upstairs where the whole family is hand-wringing and cutely nervous to meet Tim. I find this part so adorable it reminds of the time I used to like Christopher and think he was a sweet little angel. The mother has purchased every variety of pastry from the nearby bakery and Tim praises the effort as “very… caloric”. They all laugh and Chris makes that face you make when you’re an adult and your mom is trying really hard and you are embarrassed but no longer an asshole teenager so you’re mostly just amused and a little pitying.

Also on the menu, milk!

Christopher has his mom and dad present, what I guess is two younger sisters and another guy who is a gay hipster complete with original Bieber hair. I have to wonder how many gay sons this pastry addict raised when we discover it’s actually Christopher’s boyfriend. Statistically, that makes more sense. They all tease a little and say Chris is flamboyant and dramatic but the parents seem really proud of him and supportive. Nice family!

Also nice: Making your parents perch awkwardly on the ottoman!

Next up is Unibrow. He is in NYC sketching away on his HP thingy. Gotta justify that sponsor money! I guess Tim is not getting many frequent flyer points this season. Unibrow’s boyfriend is present and Unibrow is nervous. Maybe it’s from living indoors lately or maybe it’s that his designs look like pastel bed sheets so far. One thing he isn’t nervous about? Grossing Tim out with his digs! Tim was expecting to finally figure out the mystery of what the inside of Oscar’s can really looks like, so he is taken aback to find himself on the set of Million Dollar Listing NY.

Looks like the owner can afford to get the homeless smell cleaned out too

MrsMiaWallace is an east coast girl with a  penchant for travel, libations and great cuisine. She is not known to turn down a mimosa or a martini and finds the transition between the two a good way to mark the passing of time since she can never remember to wear a watch. Her secret love for reality tv and addiction to Bravo have drawn her like a moth to the glittering snark of TVGasm,  where she finds there are others like her... hopefully also nursing Bloody Marys.

21 Comments

  1. 1
    lovesthehobbitses
    Posted October 15, 2012 at 9:31 pm

    “Chris makes that face you make when you’re an adult and your mom is trying really hard and you are embarrassed but no longer an asshole teenager so you’re mostly just amused and a little pitying.”

    BEAUTIFULLY put. I’ve never thought about that phenomenon before, but that is exactly what happens once someone reaches adulthood!

  2. 2
    blueberryPancake
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 5:27 am

    I am from MI and looked up where Melissa is from ( it could be considered the absolute middle of nowhere !) I had no idea that was even a place! Her parents are so midwest it’s adorable.

    Everybody’s family was super cute and supportive. I want to know what Fabios sugar daddy apartment owner does for a living..damn..nice place to slum it for a while…

    Dimitry and Tim should have taken their tea party in the hot tub…just saying….

    The collections ( or what we saw) were and SNOOZE .. I don’t know if they need more time, are worried about being to out there and playing it painfully safe , or just not as talented as designers past.

    I cant even guess who will win …Meh …
    across the board…

  3. 3
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 8:05 am

    And yet, Massapequa is the home of Jerry Seinfeld, the Stray Cats AND the Baldwin brothers, so…if we overlook Stephen, Danny (who?) and possibly (probably) Billy Baldwin, it’s done pretty well for itself.

  4. 4
    timgunnssister timgunnssister
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 8:42 am

    A tangerine Vienna sausage = things you can’t unsee.

    Anyone got some bleach they can spare?

  5. 5
    NotaNJHousewife
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 9:09 am

    The Tim visits seemed as low budget as the rest of the show has become. In past seasons didn’t the families always make a big dinner for Tim? Now he gets Chinese take out at borrowed apartments? Even worse, tea and store bought cookies at Dimitri’s borrowed apartment? Melissa’s boat ride was cute though.

    Also, Chris using his mother’s knick knack room for a studio makes it pretty obvious that he is being completely supported by the parents. The whole family probably fans him and nurtures him like he’s a hot house rose. He ain’t diving in no dumpsters for his dinners, or having to quit jobs and give up his apartment so that he could continue to create. He is obviously talented, but having your family there to relieve you of fiancial burdens and to provide emotional support has to make it easier to create. I’d like to see what a little suffering could do to his work. (Although having to work in that room full of conventional furniture and uninspired decor is probably what dulls his edge).

    Dimitri in that intimate convo with Tim – so sweet. On one hand you wonder why there are no friends around for him, on the other, it’s good to see the undiluted Dimitri. Is his the trained and practiced poise of a performer? Is he lonely and hurting inside? Or is he really as self possessed and confident as he seems? I hope so!

  6. 6
    Val Valkiria
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 9:26 am

    @NotaNJHousewife, at least there was whole milk at Christopher’s! Although I think Tim is more the soy milk kinda a guy! :)

    I was reading old PR posts here and this group seems to be the best out of the last 3 seasons! Dmitry Delicious FTW!!

  7. 7
    itchy itchy
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 9:34 am

    I could smell the fear from the judges (and the producers) through the screen when they finally figured out what this crop has been up to and what a mess they’ve made of things. And it’s surprising too, since they seemed like they were more talented than previous years (*cough* Mondo *cough* Anya).

    Maybe they should have made a rule: No black?

    And an even better rule: No pallid bedsheets?

    I’m still rooting for Melissa, who at least seems to be pretty consistent. As pleasant as Dmitry seems to be, he really only seem to know how to make ballroom-dancing costumes.

  8. 8
    timgunnssister timgunnssister
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 9:57 am

    I suspect the lack of family/friends surrounding Dmitry has more to do with the typical Eastern European reserve than loneliness. He was there to have his designs critiqued – not his friends. A handful of other designers from the past have done this.

  9. 9
    Lisa
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 9:59 am

    tangerine vienna sausage — Hilarious!

  10. 10
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 10:28 am

    Before the switch from Magical Elves to Bunim-Murray, the designers got three months to work on the 10 look collection and then five days to cast models, fit and finish the garments. That’s why we got the third season finale of Laura’s lovely eveningwear, Uli’s gorgeous resortwear and, yes, Jeffrey’s funky sportswear. I know he chapped a lot of people’s asses but his collection was pretty gorgeous, as were the other two. The less said about Michael’s hoochie clubwear, the better.

    But with only five weeks and 10 people showing, there’s less attention to detail and it shows. They’re not making collections they’re mostly just making 10 more PR garments. I think all four of the finalists would have done much better work, and been competitive, in the early seasons they just weren’t given the time or the opportunity to produce their best because Bunim-Murray suck at producing any show that doesn’t feature falling down drunk, belligerent 20-somethings.

  11. 11
    AmyOops AmyOops
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 11:15 am

    As I probably say every recap, I still really like Chris. What he showed the judges, however…not so much. I also don’t count it against him that he has a loving family, not that I think anyone else does. The truth often sucks, and artists can get major inspiration from hard times and strife, ahem, Dmitry.

    Although I am a huge Chris fan, I think I’m pulling for Dmitry for the win. What we saw of his collection, while not awe inspiring (they only have FIVE measly weeks), was solid.

    As much I like Fabio, I have to say…what was he THINKING? Although I do love the way he styled the boots :-)

  12. 12
    msjacqmills
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 12:25 pm

    I actually love this final four (well, I’d replace Freegan with Sonjia)…but, they do get screwed with only 5 weeks to complete their collection. Why did they make this crappy change?! I’ll bet they all could come up with amazing collections if they had 3 whole months.

    And then only giving them 2 days to take their criticism and make the changes is just ridiculous. I’d rather see amazing collections than the freaked out designer drama the producers seem to love.

    I was flabbergasted at the positive feedback they gave Freegan. Who would wear that stuff?

    I’ve always liked Christopher, but his collection, especially the 3 looks he showed this week, were pretty weak.

    It’s gotta be Tara or Dmitry who pulls this thing out. I think they’re gonna give it to Tara, although I’m really hoping it’s Delicious Dmitry.

  13. 13
    dilia
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 12:40 pm

    i thought fabio had the worst collection, personally. but i like him as a person

  14. 14
    juddfan
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 1:09 pm

    oddly, I end up liking Uni’s collection, but it definitely looked like people from the set on a planet that the star ship enterprise would visit, with more color. Nothing was structured, which I think will hurt him, but it did look like a collection.

    Tara, overall, I think has the most potential. Kind of typical pieces, with more coolness to them.
    Chris, meh, it looked well done, and I like the x-ray pattern, but the color is so blah. I didn’t like the distressed leather either, looked cheap, and like a mistake.

    Dimi, I love like the rest of you, but I found it rather boring. I mean, they all were, but somehow his was just yawn. I loved that cut away coat he die, LOVED IT!!!! But that white dress is nowhere near as exciting . . . and the see-thru black tops, cheap, and like , seasons and seasons ago, style wise . . .

    @Mrs. Mia: “Thank God his dog wasn’t recently neutered” . . . . . . HAHAHHAHAHAAAA!!!!

  15. 15
    CynTV CynTV
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 1:25 pm

    God, I was so BORED by these showings! Here’s what I don’t get. If I, as a designer, consider going entering the Project Runway contest, common sense says a): I kind of have a collection swirling around in my head long before I even enter the contest, and b): I’m going to watch past seasons to see if there are any duplicate challenges. That way I can think about what I want to do ahead of time, since time management is such an issue. The other thing I would do is travel to NYC if possible and memorize all the departments in Mood. But that’s just me talkin’. Ahh – I long for past winners like Jay McCarroll, Christian Siriano, and Irina S. I loved Irina’s clothes..

    And Tim needs his own show. I love him.

  16. 16
    itchy itchy
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 1:56 pm

    Ha, it’s like going on Survivor not knowing how to make fire.

  17. 17
    juddfan
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 3:07 pm

    CynTV, I couldn’t agree more . . . growing up wanting to be a musician, I had whole album lists in my head for this and that list. Just a ton of dreaming, so it makes me curious when they don’t have a dream collection they’ve always wanted to do, or two or three . . .

  18. 18
    Sugarbush Sugarbush
    Posted October 16, 2012 at 3:45 pm

    I love Dmitry, of course, and I thought he had some beautiful pieces. However, the clothes he put out during the season were better. Apparently I’m totally lost on dressing my age, because they seem to think that Dmitry’s looks are “old lady” yet I think they’re beautiful, flattering, sexy but not whore-y, and I would totally wear them if I could afford them….and if I ever wore anything other than my husband’s giant t-shirts and raggedy underwear while slugging on the couch.

    Chris is jerking off that Tangerine Vienna Sausage, because there’s no way he deserved to stay. He should have gone home long ago. And he’s a bitch.

    Let’s just hand the trophy to Dmitry so we can all hop into the celebratory hot tub with him and Tim.

  19. 19
    DallasHockeyMom
    Posted October 17, 2012 at 10:11 pm

    Why did we even have this episode? They didn’t design anything and they didn’t cut anyone. Yawn….

  20. 20
    CoolKymom
    Posted October 18, 2012 at 5:40 pm

    Love the Notting Hill reference!!!!

    I am still in love with Dmitry. I agree wholeheartedly with Sugarbush.

    Here is to hoping that tonight’s episode is more interesting.

  21. 21
    isthathissister
    Posted October 19, 2012 at 9:26 pm

    “I feel like Jay McCarroll was holed up with more fabric than floor space in his godforsaken southern hometown”. Wasn’t Jay from the middle of Pennsylvania? Hardly a southern town….

    Also, as much as I love Dmitry, his jacket with the fringe reminds me of the second amendment: the right to bear arms.

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