Later on, Joanna deigns to visit the Hovel by the Bay, and they all proceed to day drink. Lisa and Lea don’t do hoveltime, so they hang out overlooking the beach. Lea says she’s having a wooooonderful time – any excuse to wear a turban, I suppose. She’s got one in every color imaginable. They start talking about babies, and Lisa breaks down, weeping that Lenny’s given her so much and she just wants to give him a son. Aw, sad. You can lead an egg to semen, but you can’t make it drink. She says the problem isn’t getting pregnant, it’s staying pregnant, and while they’ve tried surrogacy, it didn’t work. Lea’s sweet and sympathetic, in her way, and promises Lisa that pregnancy will come when the younger woman least expects it. Then she tells her to get like, eight surrogates going at the same time and to keep trying, so… mixed messages? Lisa’s all lovey-dovey, weepy-creepy in the face of Lea’s frankness, and interviews about how she never thought they’d get that close. Hate to break it to you Lisa, but I’m pretty sure Lea would have had the same conversation with a complete stranger if they caught her at the right time. Don’t start planning the wedding, yet.
Anyone seen “Soapdish”? Anyone wanna have a quote off?
After that, it’s off to conch! I mean lunch! I mean conch lunch. Dick jokes ensue. Apparently the wiggly tapeworm conchs call a penis is an aphrodisiac if swallowed whole. Seriously? Is there some kind of secret society filled with oyster fisherman and conch magnates that has set out to perpetuate some kind of rumor that slimy disgusting shit is supposed to be romantic? You know what’s romantic? Candles, red wine and rock hard erections. I love me some oysters, but they remind me of swallowing phlegm, and do NOT put me in the mood to get nasty. Kudos to Ana for eating the conch dinck, though.
Do you guys know how to spell feminism?
Marysol’s had about four mimosas and is now nursing a rum and coke, so she’s right at that point of buzzed where you think you can conquer the world! I got there last night sipping my 3rd glass of $6 red wine and listening to “One Day More,” from Les Mis. Yay Friday! She announces that she feels so good, it’s time to take the bull by the horns and get herself the fuck divorced! All the other ladies are like, “Great?” She interviews that she loves her mans, but they can’t live together. Read: she loves him, but he got his Green Card and now finds the relationship lacking in… shall way, necessity? I know that sounds crass, but if anyone were going to get duped into a Green Card marriage out of these women, who else would it be? Anywho, she’s done with his ass, and it seems like she’s in a good (drunk) place. Commercial!