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Here’s Brigham Young:
Meri has planned the entire trip – and badly too. As the ep goes on, it becomes apparent that she’s basically taken the mileage between Vegas and Nauvoo and divided it up into “x” miles per day, without taking into account a) they never get started on time; b) they’re chronically disorganized; c) kids; d) weather; and e) Kody. Meri, how’s about you go into the trip planning business? I hear the Costa Concorda has an opening for a cruise director.
Day 1. They have to get to Grand Junction, Colorado. They’ll be traveling 15 hours minimum. Kody complains they have to stop every few hours for a “potty stop”. Um, you do know RVs have toilets, right? When the family parks for the night, Kody’s already whining they “can’t be 4 hours late every night”. This bodes well.
Commercial. It’s Day 2. Mariah observes no one knows what they’re doing. How’s about you get off your ass and help then, you little snot?
Meri says they have to make an RV park in Goodland, Kansas by that evening. Quelle freaking surprise, they’re late again. On the couch, Kody says he’s having trouble “rotating” between the wives on the trip. Robyn says she hates that word. I hate the fact that he can’t just ride with one pair of wives (there are 2 per RV) for half the day, the other pair for the other half. There’s your “rotation”. Janelle says Kody gets overwhelmed and is often “grumpy”.
Day 3, and the group is in Maysville, Missouri. Robyn observes they can’t make Nauvoo in 3 days. Kody cites the wind – it’s blowing some awnings off the RVs – and lack of sleep as impeding their progress. He says he’s only had 4 hours sleep for 2 days. OK, first of all, even if you’re getting into these rest stops at 11 PM, it should take maybe an hour to get those folks who are staying in hotels – oh, did I not mention that? Christine and Robyn are staying in hotels while Janelle and Meri get the RVs – situated. Then sleep. You’re not getting up any earlier than 6 if past experience holds – in fact, you’re probably not getting up until 7 or 8. So you have a lot more than 4 hours’ sleep. Cause even if you are getting any action, that takes what, 3 minutes for you?
In an RV with Meri and Robyn, Kody tries to convince Meri that she’s too tired to drive – she’s obviously not – and refuses to listen to her suggestion that he just rest. Wearing his widdle purple backpack, Kody storms out of the RV. On the couch, Kody states he just “wanted to bark orders and have them obey”, to which Christine responds that she believes “obey” is a 4-letter word. She goes on to say the wives do their best, and “obey” is offensive. Funny, it wasn’t when Joe Darger was giving the orders a couple weeks ago.