RHOA Recap: Hollywood Shuffle

Recaps

By L Boogie | Tuesday, March 5, 2013 | 4:48 pm | 9 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Real Housewives of Atlanta, Recaps

Gregg has some sympathy and gives them a cheese platter. That was actually pretty smart of him. They’ll eat but their stomachs will be churning more than Porsha’s when she has to figure out which hand to use during the Pledge of Allegiance. The girls take off and end up getting burgers and fries. Kandi wonders why they were even negotiating with NeNe in the first place. She fails to realize that she was the only one doing the talking, the rest were ready to go, and most foodies have memory lapses once they get something to eat.

The next morning, NeNe prepares for her scene while her pool boy tends to the pool.

A water pool without water? How dreadful!

Okay, there was water but you couldn’t even see it. I guess they have to keep it at a low level due to Gregg being a special guy who probably has to wear a helmet and floaties into the pool. He asks if the girls have called her and she says no. She’s prepared to move on though. 

Meanwhile, Kenya is preparing breakfast for the ladies in a sports bra or crop top. some of them think it’s a dig at Phaedra who shows up for breakfast in a Mrs. Roper 1st Edition muumuu. I think Kenya is just comfortable like that. I hate wearing clothes at home. Except when I’m frying stuff. Which she is. Okay, she’s trying to play Phaedra.

The breakfast is good and the ladies leave on time for improv. Kenya takes over and explains that she really wants the girls to do this because she’s an actress and it’s her world and she’s from L.A. and blah, blah, blah. Guess who’s not there? Ne to the Ne. The instructor asks who has acting experience and Kenya runs down her credits, Cynthia reveals that she was on The Cosby Show, Phaedra declines to mention her starring role in Pootie Tang and Kandi did stuff in high school. 


Teacher: If you’ve acted before, stand still. If you haven’t, clap like idiots.

They do the class and in one exercise they have to yell compliments at each other. Porsha’s compliment is that Kenya’s belly button is almost invisible. Anyone care to share what that means and tell me if I should start erasing mine? 

NeNe finally shows up and the class is over. Haha! She says that it’s payback. Ummm, no. It’s called White people don’t play that mess and the class started on time. 

“I can’t believe you started without me. I’m a total cut up! Get it? Do I win the class?”

They took a tour of Paramount Studios in which NeNe nearly killed Kenya twice. She showed us her thong and her trailer. Next! The girls are off to dinner that night. Porsha doesn’t get a drink and the girls start asking if she’s pregnant or trying. She denies it and ends up sipping something later. Something tells me Porsha’s mother did the same exact thing throughout her pregnancy with her.

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9 Comments

  1. 1
    Derek Hazelton
    Posted March 5, 2013 at 8:55 pm

    @LBoogs, I saw this contest on Kandi’s twitter, so enter and have a great time:
    http://instagram.com/p/WgJFJThJA_/

    I have to say that I hope Kenya takes stock of how horrible she is when people would rather invite her fake ex boyfriend to dinner parties than her.

    I also hope Porscha takes some sort of remedial class to learn how a Keurig K-Cup machine works.

    And, Nene, always trying to show off how rich she is! Why would she have the dinner party on the day that the “girls” arrive in Hollywood? Why would she have a dinner party at 9pm, if their flight came in at 6pm? Would Nene have banned them from her property had their flight been delayed? I couldn’t take her on WWHL throwing shade, but I did love how her and Cynthia coined the new term: Suzy(?), which meant shit-stirrer.

  2. 2
    2muchbravo
    Posted March 5, 2013 at 11:21 pm

    I only just put my first K-Cup thingy in the other day and I wasn’t sure which end went up. I have two college degrees. So, cut Little P some slack.

    I think Nene was absolutely right about her dinner party. She hired caterers and bought dinnerware to have a nice dinner for her friends. The friends who didn’t care enough to even so much as call to tell her they weren’t going to make it anywhere close to 9 PM. Fuck BPT that’s just plain rude. If they were really there for Nene they would have made a fucking effort to be there on time. They were all wearing the same clothes from the plane. It’s not like they were all spending time showering and changing. And, their laughing just made it worse. My opinion of Kandi changed. I was shocked at how blase’ she was about the whole thing. I would have been furious. Nene was actually very much in control. She could have zapped out at them like she used to with Kim. My conclusion was that they just didn’t give a shit enough to try to be on time.

    You don’t know how many days they had in LA. There may not have been any other night to hold the dinner.

  3. 3
    Classy Drunk Classy Drunk
    Posted March 6, 2013 at 5:49 am

    I”m with Derek. 9 pm the day the girls arrive?!?!!? Flying from east coast to west coast is already hard enough then I have to make it to a 9 pm dinner. That doesn’t give the girls any time to really freshen up and recover from an almost 5 hour flight.

    The girls should have let Nene know that they were as late as they were because she did put the time and effort into the dinner. I also would not have let them in as the dinner was over.

    The men seemed to have bonded in Anguilla so they will probably attend each others events. I.e. Kordell’s birthday party. Was Porsha’s snide remark necessary…no…but did I enjoy it. YES! :)

  4. 4
    NatPatBen
    Posted March 6, 2013 at 6:35 am

    @LBoogie, you had me CRACKING UP on the bus this morning when I read that Kandy hadn’t eaten in 12.. minutes. I thought I was about to read 12 hours.

    I understood Kandi’s response at Nene’s. She felt like they were late, that was wrong, so they should accept it (and a to-go plate) and move on.

  5. 5
    Mimo
    Posted March 6, 2013 at 9:22 am

    Do the cameramen purposely take the most unflattering shots of the women he can? Because I got to tell ya – if my legs and ass were as big as Phaedra’s and Kandi’s looked on the last telecast – I certainly wouldn’t be wearing print pants with a crop top. And to be honest, I thought I was bigger than them until I saw those shots. I can’t imagine that Phaedra actually thinks that anyone would buy a workout video by her if A weren’t in it.

  6. 6
    NotWithoutMyTV NotWithoutMyTV
    Posted March 6, 2013 at 10:25 am

    2muchbravo: “The friends who didn’t care enough to even so much as call to tell her they weren’t going to make it anywhere close to 9 PM. Fuck BPT that’s just plain rude. If they were really there for Nene they would have made a fucking effort to be there on time.”

    Yeah, because the battleship U.S.S. NeNe always pulls into port right on time….

    DerekHazelton: “Why would she have the dinner party on the day that the “girls” arrive in Hollywood? Why would she have a dinner party at 9pm, if their flight came in at 6pm?”

    I’m sure it was one of those ka-razee coinky-dinks that happen on the Housewives shows all the time. Had nothing at all to do with a word that starts with P and rhymes with “scroducers”.

    ClassyDrunk: “The men seemed to have bonded in Anguilla so they will probably attend each others events.”

    Also probably part of the pan-franchise plan to make all the men into Housewives with slightly deeper voices. It will be interesting to see if the Atlanta men slide into their new roles as shrill, hysterical cunts as quickly and as completely as did the Beverly Hills men.

    Mimo: “Do the cameramen purposely take the most unflattering shots of the women he can?”

    These women don’t possess flattering angles. Bravo doesn’t pay the production crews enough for them to go all Industrial Lights and Magic to make NeNe or Kandi or Phaedra look less like hip-hopotamuses.

  7. 7
    Classy Drunk Classy Drunk
    Posted March 7, 2013 at 6:09 am

    I am beginning to think the rumors about Phaedra and Apollo having marriage issues is true. I have seen him gallivanting around town and it seems some young woman (a different one each time) is with him.

  8. 8
    LAC LAC
    Posted March 7, 2013 at 12:08 pm

    L Boogie, you kill me with those Phaedraisms – sometimes I have to go back to understand what she said the first time.

    Nene – I am sorry, but I am with her. I get that some of these heiffas were running behind, but I think there is such a thing as more than one mothafuckin’ car to get some of your asses to an event. Get Stupid Model, Kray Kray, and Kandi Coated Ribs in one car heading out. When Phaedra is ready, she can make sure that Porsha get her heels on the right foot and take the next car. That way, the lateness is not as serious. This ain’t a club. I get a half hour, but not almost midnight. As the Queen of Hollywood said “Exit to the left” . Look, Nene is as trife as they get at times, but this was way stupid and none of the Bravo blogs address really why they were that late.

    Kandi – damn, girl. Burn those pants you wore and back away from the food. And when you get pregnant and eat for two, one of those ain’t Orson Wells. Her attitude got on my nerves.

    Porsha – I know that some of the newer coffee makers are not easy, but damn! Creamer and coffee are two different things. And I am not in the mood for Alexis Blackllino. Normally, dumb ones do not bother me as much, but I think she is one of those dumb bitches that likes to say nasty things to other women because she is pretty.

    Kenya – That five seconds you were in “Waiting to Exhale” was the best five seconds evah! :) And gurl, “Haitian Nights” is a tour de force! I wanted to comment on the movie’s official site, but I needed to buy the domain name first.

    Phaedra – sho’ enough, you can tell when a woman is expecting – her mint julep is a-bubblin’ like mush on a summah day. I just want her to get a fan and a hoop skirt already.

    Cynthia – taking one for the team – WTF does that mean? Just get your ass there on time. Just pretend it is one of your pageants and,….oh, never mind…

  9. 9
    Neecy
    Posted March 8, 2013 at 7:05 pm

    Ok. What dinner party in LA that starts at 9:00 pm is over, cleaned up, and all the drunks gone home by midnite? Why didn’t we see any shots of Nene’s party? Bravo cameras would have been all over Ne-Ne’s party if she had one. We didn’t see one hors d’oerve (?), one purple drank, one party guest, not one shot of the fabulous food — nothing.

    I don’t believe she had a party. I think it was producer-made drama.

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