Also, Adriana? RICH PEOPLE DON’T LIVE ON BOATS. At least, not only boats. Regardless of how luxurious it is, you’re effectively living in a parking lot, and the only other type of home that moves with as much ease as a boat is a trailer. Think about that.
After the tour is finished, Lisa and Adriana sit down to sip champagne and discuss babies. Adriana could go either way, but Frederic doesn’t want one, so she’s cool if she just has Alex. Also, what Frederic wants doesn’t really mean much to her anyway, so que sera sera. Lisa’s not so chill – she and Lenny want kids, but they’ve been trying for three years and so far, nothing. Aw. She earns some points by admitting that that’s why they got married – to start a family.
You’re slightly less horrible than your plastic surgery would lead us to believe.
We’re back to more Adriana, but really, Elsa. Ad stops by to visit, and the two women talk about Ad’s refusal to fully commit to Frederic. Elsa tells her straight up that Ad’s just not that into him, and that Ad isn’t ready to accept the love of any man because she’s still reeling from her previous marriage. Which, DAMN – Roberto? Secret family? I had no idea that shit happened to her. It’s like when Goldie Hawn, in the hit 90s thriller “Deceived,” discovers her perfect family is all a lie, and her husband, John Heard is leading a double life filled with intrigue, art theft, and murder. And another family. Just like Ad.
Great fucking movie.
Adriana agrees with Elsa, and explains that after Roberto, she vowed never to be dependent on any man ever again, and Elsa balks at that with some good old-fashioned chauvinism. Beautiful women need to be taken care of, she says, and claims that Ad just needs to find the right pillow to lay her head down on. And that pillow is filled with money. This is pretty much Elsa’s entire shtick, but I don’t care. What’s there is cherce.
Ugh, back to Karent. Oh, the silent “T” is a Columbian thing, for what it’s worth. So if you keep making fun of it, just be warned that you might be considered racist and/or a target of the cartels. Karent’s at her dental spa, and I’ve just discovered the first thing I like about her. She runs a dental SPA. First of all – WTF, LA? How did you let Miami beat you to the punch on this one? Why the hell don’t we have dental spas where you can get paraffin hand treatments at the same time as teeth whitening? FAIL. Second of all, score one for Karent, because THAT is a fucking good idea. This is one dentist that isn’t going to commit suicide.
She finishes her appointment with an understandably happy patient, and heads in to meet her publicist. Publicist has booked Karent for a bajillion events in the coming weeks because Karent really wants to build a celebrity client base. The whole thing is a little silly, but I imagine for a beauty queen cum dentist cum spa director cum real housewife, it’s just another Tuesday.