Sister Wives Recap: The Kids Are Alright

| | 6:10 pm | 55 Comments
Posted in: Recaps, Sister Wives

That’s our Kody.  He can bring home the bacon AND fry it up.  For about 10 people.  Out of 22.

Howdy, Gasmii!  Happy New Year’s!  Have you made any resolutions?  Mine are the usual:  drape myself entirely in velvet every day, become Queen of England, win the Nobel Prize for Chemistry.  Same as everyone.

Also, I want to be an architect.  And a marine biologist.

On to our show!  We had 2 eps this week for the season finale.  First, the adults – plus 2 infants – sidebar here:  why do Truely and Solomon have to be dragged everywhere?  Can’t the other kids, or Robin’s sister, or someone just babysit them for a freaking hour?  We know you can breed, gals.  You don’t need to bring the evidence everywhere you go! – are at the realtor’s making yet more choices on the houses.  I’ve never had a house built, but wouldn’t these choices be made all at once?  This is at least the third such visit we’ve seen.  This time, the wives are picking out carpet and tile.  Kody presses for a house completion date, and the realtor says December.

On the couch, Kody says he wants to move “all at once”.  Why wouldn’t they move “all at once”?  If they don’t, they have to pay mortgages plus continue to pay rent.  But then I doubt that occurred to Kody.  Kody goes on to say he doesn’t care if they celebrate Christmas out of boxes.

WE could’ve used a couple of boxes, you know.

Christine, emotional, says she doesn’t care about Christmas at all, she just wants them to close.  Christine goes on to say she’s up “every morning at 3″, has way too much to do, is more and more behind, says a couple of times she has to be “perfect on paperwork”, ending with the impressively mature statement “paperwork is stupid”.  By the way, Christine, if you’re looking for a job, steer clear of shift work at NORAD.

Kody reminds Christine that they’re all dealing with the same issues.  Robyn pipes up that Kody is not “validating” Christine (STFU, Robyn!), and Christine tells Kody he “sucks “at validating, while dramatically leaning forward and putting her hands to her head.

He can only validate if you have the right ticket, honey.

Kody says that Christine isn’t alone in this process, while Janelle smiles the smile of someone who’s already completed their paperwork.  Christine apologizes, and Kody repeats they are all dealing with managing their own budgets.  He points out for the millionth time that they still haven’t qualified, there are conditions they have to meet to actually get the mortgages.  Well, real people with actual jobs would have conditions they had to meet.  You, with your TLC lifestyle?  We all know there’s no actual issue here.

Named for lurid serialized stories (so like today's reality TV) that sold for a penny a copy in Victorian Britain, former National Spelling Bee finalist and multiple Science Fair award winner PennyDreadful has been writing for TVGasm since 2011, and cites MST3K as inspiration.

1. 1
ohralphie
Posted January 1, 2013 at 8:45 pm

It’s no surprise that Meri likes DoucheDads ‘surfer hair’ as she has the slightly more feminine version of his hairstyle. Crap, even their chunky blonde highlights are in the same places. I wonder if that is her subtle reminder to the other wives just who is the Alpha Wife of the group?
Does anyone know how old Meri is? Because as someone who has been through infertility treatment I have two observations:
- Meri looks a tad old to be using her own eggs. And by ‘tad’ I mean about a ten years too late.
- Ferility meds puts you on a rollercoaster of emotion most of which involve crying and hair trigger rages. God help the other wives if and when that goes down. But it would make for a much more interesting story arch then their jewlery line.

2. 2
mommy2bree
Posted January 1, 2013 at 9:08 pm

Meri is 41.

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Robin
Posted January 1, 2013 at 10:10 pm

Thanks PD

I have worked in construction most of my life for the same contractor. I ran a crew for many yrs building custom homes. It isn’t unusual to have a final meeting to pick out final finishes if the homeowner is hands on. For example, ceiling fans, lighting fixtures, decorative knobs on the cabinets, etc. One of my fav parts of my job was to go to Home Depot and track down the item #’s when the homebuyer lived out of town. They would send the # in email and I would pick it up. Don’t tell anybody, but sometimes when I found it, I said to myself..thats ugly shit!.

This is the part that has me thinking hmm. That real estate agent has no buisiness talking to them about their budget if they are buying the house from the contractor. The sale of the house should be her only concern. It would also behoove her to agree with every purchase for the house because the value would go up and she would get a better commission dontcha think? again, hmmm

I think that there is a lease agreement and they do not own a lick of the snake. I think that TLC greased some palms and gave the contractor enough money to break ground and pretend he was selling a house to these yahoo’s.

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Robin
Posted January 1, 2013 at 10:40 pm

They will gladly pay you Tuesday for a house today

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Dutchiedevil
Posted January 2, 2013 at 4:10 am

I am just at page 1, but when Kody says they are all dealing with their own budgets that he has one too? After reading this and seeing some episodes of season 1 (yes we are behind you guys A LOT), I thought he just mooched of the sw’s budgets and spent anything else on himself: ie his stoopid cars

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Dutchiedevil
Posted January 2, 2013 at 4:28 am

Although Meri IS an entitled little beatch, I would be pissed as well as OUR realtor would speak to my husband first without me being present.

And the blue picture? I would have thought it obvious it represents Kody’s hot dog

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kthxbai
Posted January 2, 2013 at 9:22 am

“…from the time that we had Logan born” ??!? WTF does THAT mean, Kodoofus?

(Thanks to @sheesh for my new synonym for Cap’n Creamsicle)

The 1st 15 minutes of this episode was about what ugly color of beige rug they wanted. When there was a blue 1 right there. That by itself tells you all you need to know about these people.

@Penny Dreadful They’re getting on my last nerve with those houses too. Plus I thought they were going to shave Kodoofus’s bad Bozo wig off. So I’m right back in my grumpy mood I was just getting out of. Which all of you are about to be in with me because it also happens to be an extra pain pill day.

On Million Dollar Decorators I expect to see Martyn Blaaahd call a $30K lamp scrumptious and get 6. Even though the clearance aisle at Marshall’s got them for$12.99. When Scumbags of Sunset comes on I know they’re going to be sharting diamond soup with homestyle gold chunks.

But the swives are supposed to be serving regular family. Well News Flash. Regular families don’t whine and complain because they’ve got to spend some of their $1000s of$ they’ve got in the bank. Because they went over their imaginary budget. Picking out their carrera marble upgrade options.

These days a regular family with a real budget’s grateful if they can hang onto the 4 walls and a roof option.

Even 1 if it’s not half as big and fancy as the 1 @Penny Dreadful ‘s nice enough to remind us they already OWN in Utah. That state that called the popo off of their ass? So they could go back to anyway. Except they’d have to use their TLC \$ to move instead of get Meri a wet bar that comes with a mandatory hobby arena with a 5th (fifth?!?) bedroom stuck to it.

Last week @sweetblondie said something about Christine starting to come across a certain way. I noticed that too. My theory is Christine started out with so many modern romance ideas in her head. And then got friend zoned so hard she’s over it. And doesn’t have jackshit to lose emotionally any more.

The way Bozo treats her, his tone, makes the other swives feel so sorry for her they’ve started getting onto him about it. In front of her and on tv.

I don’t know if anybody else does this. But I can’t help thinking about how all the swives would be if they’d been born in regular modern life. Instead of OG Mormon polygamy ways.

In that alterverse Christine would be the girl that falls 100% in love super young. And gets her heart 100% broken, sliced for sandwiches and handed back to her on a plastic plate from the walmart that’s been run through the dishwasher 1 time too many.

So by the time she gets to college she’s the 1 that the normal girls call cynical. And the girls that make good grades think’s a hoot. It’s liable to be 20 or 30 yrs before she ever lets herself have so much as a crush on anybody. Or trust anybody. Even her BFF. If she ever does.

Her stage she’s at now she’s still got feelings for Kodoofus. But they’re feelings of contempt. And they’re real busy stuffing their clothes in garbage bags. Because they already booked a 1 way ticket to Dahell, Outer There. And rented their room out to Dongiva Fuk.

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Jennifer
Posted January 2, 2013 at 10:27 am

I hate to say it, but I am really really starting to dislike Meri. I loved her at the beginning, but this last season she has turned into a selfish brat. I don’t know if she had me fooled before or now. I LOVE Jenelle. She is awesomely awesome!. I know that sounds dumb, but seriously, she seems to be the most level headed of them all and I think she is great! I just hope Meri can turn it around, she is really making herself look bad, and I really enjoyed the old Meri.

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kthxbai
Posted January 2, 2013 at 10:35 am

Modern ways Alterverse Janelle would’ve gotten full rides to any college she wanted. And then any law school. She’d have fancy law firms fighting over her when she graduated. And make partner quicker than anybody in the 1 she picked’s history. Because having this beautiful blonde girl that always wins made them look so good. And committed to equal rights.

When reality shows got cranked up she’d get discovered. And Bravo would find a couple of other cast members to be with her on Million Dollar Lawyers.

She’d end up being a plus size single mom icon. Every week there’d be something in the tabloids with her saying she and John Mayer are just good friends. And sharing her recipe for salmon steak salad. With dill and honey mustard dressing. Except made with Splenda. So her fans can eat the exact same thing as all her 900 guests did at her wedding to the exact same Baldwin brother that’s secretly been her baby daddy all this time.

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thisbuggs4u
Posted January 2, 2013 at 11:51 am

@kthxbai-girl you crack me up!! But you are spot on with your thinking of Janelle and Christine…

At first I really liked Meri and hated Christine. Then Robyn came along and I still didn’t like Christine. But After that lunch date she had with Robyn I can totally see where she was coming from. Do we know how old Robyn is? From what Koduche said last week, \if you had a baby, you could stay in a hotel room\…assface!…I can totally see that when you have a baby, you get all of his time and attention…
Living in 1 house with all 3 wives I can see where that would not really bother them, but now we can all see that he favors Robyn and not Meri anymore…

I think that Janelle might be done with the baby factory, and Christine was hoping that she might be able to hatch one more….now I bed Christine is like take your wiener and get the fuk outta here!

Meri did say back in season 1 that she had a miscarriage after she had Meriah….eff the way these assholes spell their kids names makes my auto correct freak out….She also told Koduche when they went to Mexico, that she did not want to do invitro….I do feel sorry for Meri in that, yes she wants to have more kids, but she knows that she can’t, and she does not want to go through the disappointment and emotional rollercoasters that IVF will bring…But I can also see why she has not given Robyn her answer to being a Surrogate. At this point if Robyn is surrogate, that baby is totes Robyn and Koduches…Meri’s eggs are \to old\. ** I wanted to donate my eggs, but I am \to old\ to donate mine, and I just turned 33..**

So yeah, Meri is now replacing her baby fix with all this shit in her house that she doesn’t even need!! I would tolerate her more if she were just to say, \Hey, I like to entertain, and I love it when everyone in the family comes to my house. This is the reason I want this in my house.\ Didn’t a couple of Chirstine’s girls’ go and move into Meri’s for a while??

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jp
Posted January 2, 2013 at 12:19 pm

About the quilt (and in response to a comment on the minicap), I also have seen the tshirt ones and love them and think that would have been much more acceptable to bring to college than the faces one. Heck it would have been better if they only signed it even. One of my friends had a tshirt one and it was actually a nice conversation piece when she had people over to her dorm room.

@Robin that sounds like my kind of job! Seeing how other people put together their homes to their tastes sounds fun. Sign me up…

What the heck is Meri going to do with all of those rooms? Like she doesnt want kids to live with her sooo whyyyy?

@kthxbai Yes that is exactly what would happen! In fact I wish she got to be that person! She would rock!

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sweetblondie
Posted January 2, 2013 at 1:53 pm

@kthxbai: Totally DIG you’re Alterverse Janelle!

But I think Alterverse Christine would’ve had a broken heart or two before finding TRUE love in her mid to late thirties…

Alterverse Kody would still have 4 baby mamas though…

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live2tivo
Posted January 2, 2013 at 5:28 pm

I was never really on board with Meri’s insistence that she *needed* a house as big as all of the others. But, when your husband is playing Oprah (YOU GET A HOUSE! YOU GET A HOUSE! YOU ALL GET A HOUSE!), it can be easy to start feeling entitled.

I understand that Meri wants/needs more space to entertain. Fine. But she doesn’t have to deck it out quite so much. She clearly has expensive tastes, and I’m not sure why she can’t settle for something that’s not entirely what she wants now and fix it up later? That’s what she’d be doing if they were buying a pre-built house.

Of course, none of this works unless Meri is a rational human being. Which we all know isn’t the case.

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kaleow
Posted January 2, 2013 at 6:36 pm

Does it bother anyone else that Kody always says “So Meri…are we going to have a baby or not?” Like it’s that easy. I don’t have kids and have never gone through any sort of fertility treatments but anyone with half a brain would know that just because you make the decision to begin IVF does not in any way ensure success. Especially at Meri’s age…she’s no spring chicken.
It just bugs me that, like everything else with these people, they just assume things should be handed to them because of their “hardships” and “determination.”

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jen
Posted January 2, 2013 at 8:29 pm

I guess its telling that they know their kids probably WON’T come back that they think this is the ‘last Christmas’ the 2 girls will have at home since most college students do head home for that holiday. I’m sure some stay but my campus kicked everyone out and everyone I knew went home. I guess they know the girls will flee for the hills and hide out for the semester break!

If they trust their kids to come home, whats the worry? they’ll be HOME for Christmas. That reminds me of the overdramatic way Toy Story 3 handled Andy going to college “Throw away everything you aren’t bringing!” like he was going off never to return ever again and the way they stripped his room bare. It was his first year of college. He’s not going off to Mars for 4 years! Well maybe he is. Toy Story 4: Mars?

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Posted January 2, 2013 at 9:01 pm

@sweetblondie and @thisbuggs4 you Thanks! It’s @Penny Dreadful that gets the credit though. Because she has this way of putting reality check perspective on them.

So you can’t help but wonder how they would’ve turned out.

You’re right Alterverse Bozo would’ve had 4 baby mamas. At least 3 of them before he dropped out of high school to join the Hare Krishnas. Which he’d leave after a month to be a life model at a Learning Annex drawing class. But he’d also be on the DL like Cordell on Real Housewives Atlanta.

Robyn would be 1 of the OG 1st ever generation of webcam girls.

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Robin
Posted January 2, 2013 at 10:11 pm

@jp,

You can’t just sign on! I have a DEGREEEEE! And a license!!

Yayyy! I always wanted to bring up my degree at the T&T thread but it never seemed appropriate

xo, Robin

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Posted January 2, 2013 at 11:11 pm

Does Alterverse Janelle have all that space between her eyes, too?

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Posted January 2, 2013 at 11:29 pm

Families writing mission statements is just slightly more stupid than when companies write them.

Every company’s mission statement is to “Make money.” Anything else their mission statement says–like providing customer service or fostering employee career development, is total PR bullshit.

A family’s mission statement is to “Not get divorced and end up as part-time parents.” Anything else is also total PR bullshit.

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Dutchiedevil
Posted January 3, 2013 at 3:47 am

I just had a thought: Meri is already on fertility meds AND thinks she will have multiples like Octomoron. THEN she would need all those room, wouldn’t she? And a wet bar so that she can start drinking when caring for all those kids becomes too much.

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sal
Posted January 3, 2013 at 5:17 am

@Dutchie- got me thinking… Either the rooms for Meri’s kids or for Mariah’s future sister wives and children to visit

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Mimo
Posted January 3, 2013 at 7:10 am

I would want a house as big as my sisterwives, even if I had no kids. No way in hell would I stand for getting less just because I didn’t prove to be a baby factory. That smacks of the 60′s and 70′s when my mom was paid considerably less than a man because “he had a family to support”. Not taking into consideration that he was fresh out of college with no wives and no kids and at the time my mom was the sole support of her family of 5 and 20 years experience. The houses should be comparable so that they are all “equal” once all kids are gone.

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Posted January 3, 2013 at 12:08 pm

But, they AREN’T all equal, see? Some of them are really fat, some of them have really unpleasant personalities, some aren’t particularly fertile, some produce unattractive offspring, some of them are thin and (comparatively) hot, some BroDad has had more kids with than he wanted in the first place, and some of them he hasn’t had enough kids with yet. NO WAY is BroDad gonna pay for matching McMansions for all of his wives.

Doing the home cost-to-spousal value calculus is probably very taxing for a guy like BroDad, but you know that in between thoughts of “Does Meri have more chins than she did yesterday?” and “One of these days, Christine: BANG, ZOOM, to the moon!!!”, he’s doing it.

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ohralphie
Posted January 3, 2013 at 1:12 pm

I wonder if Brodads impatience and callousness towards Meri’s decision on IVF is justified. I get the feeling that Meri has used her childless state all these years to deflect any criticism and excuse massive bitchiness. Now finally she gets her chance to have more children and she dithers….I would be fed up with it too.
That said, being infertile and watching my SWs pop out babies left and right would be painful beyond belief. And I don’t doubt for a minute that Meri would have jumped on doing IVF ten + years ago. But now…I don’t see her going through with it.

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live2tivo
Posted January 3, 2013 at 2:34 pm

Kodouch did give all the wives an equal amount of money for their houses. So, if Meri wants to have a house the same size as everyone else, she can. However, the other wives were shown to be under budget. She’s not wanting equality; she’s wanting superiority.

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sweetblondie
Posted January 4, 2013 at 9:02 am

Kody really doesn’t like Christine, does he? I’m sensing tons of resentment between those two…it’s hard to watch sometimes.

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TurtleGirl93
Posted January 5, 2013 at 4:01 pm

I also follow the conversations over at http://www.sisterwivesblog.blogspot.com–lots
of interesting peeps & opinions there too.
I’ve posted this there–I think the money should be divided by household. Example: Each parent (Grody included) is alloted 10% of the earnings and the remaining 50% is split per child but allocated into the mother’s budget. Therefore a household consisting of a mother & child would receive 12.9% of the family’s earnings while a household with a mother & 6 children would receive 27.4%. IMO that’s a fairer distribution because a larger family needs a larger house, has bigger bills & eats a lot more. Grody can contribute equally (say, 1.5% of his portion) to each household’s expenses (just like paying room & board!) and still keep enough pocket money for mousse & hairspray. I get that they are a family who lives by the “what’s mine is yours”
mantra but I absolutely positively do not think it’s fair.

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AmyOops
Posted January 5, 2013 at 7:08 pm

@TurtleGirl: I just had to chime in and say that your “budget” plan is pure genius. So it’s all ACTUALLY equally divided. I’ve been thinking of the house size/number of rooms, etc. However, I hadn’t even considered the (much) larger food, power, water, clothes, school supplies, hell even FUEL bills the others must pay. Oh Meri Meri Meri.

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Robin
Posted January 5, 2013 at 7:56 pm

It goes without saying that buying a house is a long term commitment. Meri is a fool if she thinks that she can afford that monstrosity with a wet bar on her own. She would be smart to keep her budget down and build an affordable house that can be sold for a profit when the shit hits the fan.

Because the shit is going to hit the fan eventually.

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Anniehall
Posted January 5, 2013 at 9:23 pm

If this show does not illustrate the fallacies of socialism then I do not know what will!

From each according to ability, to each according to need….

Some animals are more equal than others…..

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Tapnfeet99
Posted January 6, 2013 at 1:14 am

No matter what age or sex I was, I would die if I showed up anywhere with a picture of Kody on my blanket. Ewwwww. Would give me nightmares to see his face before I went to bed each night. <>

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Chicken Lips
Posted January 6, 2013 at 12:47 pm

I totally want to be Janelle’s friend! She is so completely over this crap, it’s hysterical to watch. She left once but it was probably hurting her kids so she came back – and I’m positive that’s the only reason. She’s over the moon that one is now out on his own…1 down, 5 to go and then she’s free wheeling. I want to go to Las Vegas just to go to lunch with her.

@sweetblondie – Kodouche used to heap all the attention on Christine when she was Last Wife. Now that she’s just another Middle Wife, all the attention is on Robyn (Shut up, Robyn!) and Christine is experiencing extreme Jan Brady syndrome. But, I don’t think Kodouche likes any of the wives but Robyn (Shut up!).

@TurtleGirl – I was planning the same budget for them – it’s obnoxious that Meri HAS to have a wet bar, a hobby room, an eat in pantry, gold plated floors, French doors (because she will NOT have sliding doors – she’s not an animal!) and scantily clad men fanning her with palm fronds while Janelle can’t get a house big enough for her SIX kids and afford a concrete patio. It’s more than obnoxious – it is pure BS. And if Kodouche didn’t open his big mouth to Christine about getting her overage, she might have given it to Janelle for the patio. I think that Christine was 100% correct in using her money for the sake of using it up instead of giving any to Meri. Ugh, Meri and Kodouche irritate me so.

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AmyOops
Posted January 6, 2013 at 3:42 pm

@Chicken Lips: I actually thought it was odd that Janelle said she got everything she needed. She most certainly did NOT. Blinds (which I guess she chose over the slab) are just as essential to a large family with small kids as the concrete outside the back door!

I admit I’ve never been much of a Janelle fan, but she is growing on me. I’d have thrown an effing fit about the budget thing…it’s just so wrong. Lets hope she’s smart enough (and I know she IS) to keep Kody’s naughty bits away from hers. Let Robyn keep popping out the babies if someone must.

I still adore Christine! She keeps it totally real and admits when she’s been a jackass.

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Chicken Lips
Posted January 6, 2013 at 6:48 pm

@Amy – I still love Christine, too. I always liked her and while I think she’s a twidge immature in her actions toward Robyn (hate), I think she’s completely justified because once Robin (hate) rolled into town, she was dropped like a syphallictic hot potato. And you are right – she completely owns her jackassery and that’s pretty awesome. I think that her getting her real estate license will be her way out. She sees what Janelle is doing (slowly plotting the escape) and wants to get some of that for herself.

I think that when Janelle and Christine talk about their belief surrounding polygamist marriage, I think that they really do believe that…but they know that, while maybe they had that in the beginning, now it is just a circus and no longer fits with what they believe but they are kind of stuck in the situation because they don’t want to rip the kids away from the family.

Free Janelle and Christine!

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nelliebelle1197
Posted January 7, 2013 at 4:54 am

@Anniehall
I am not sure how this illustrates any fallacy in socialism. This arrangement has nothing to do with socialism. If anything, it is pure capitalism- Meri is the top dog CEO who feels like she should get a huge share of the pie when her contributions are very small. That type of equal division doesn’t fit with socialism at all and the quote you used actually underscore the fallacy of your argument.

Turtlegirl’s budget plan, which is truly more of a socialist/Marxist division and is the division that fits the quote you pulled from Marx’s Critique of the Gotha Program (a creed itself apparently derived from the New Testament), is the most logical thing these buffoons could do to make sure each family has what it needs.

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sweetblondie
Posted January 7, 2013 at 9:13 am

@Chicken Lips: I just don’t know about Kody’s true feelings for Christine.

Back in the Day…Meri was totally abusive towards Janelle (which I can TOTALLY see btw)…the whole family probably lived in tension a lot before Christine came.

Kody has admitted that he was revolted by her when they first met…so when Christine chose Kody (is my memory serving me right here? Christine chose them, right?) he probably felt that she was icky but would bring a much needed extra element to their family that might be beneficial to everyone. And seems he was right.

I get the feeling that Christine always loved Kody and that feeling was never really reciprocated fully but that Christine was contented with that because she knew she was the new (and last) wife…

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sweetblondie
Posted January 7, 2013 at 9:53 am

So I’m not sure Kody ever really loved Christine…and now that Robyn is in the family…it’s like he doesn’t even care to make an effort to show her he even cares anymore…

S’ok…she’s gonna sell some houses and Janelle will teach her how to stash some money on the side until she’s ready to run…(sweetblondie says hopefully)…

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AmyOops
Posted January 7, 2013 at 7:24 pm

Oh, @Chicken Lips, I’m gonna have to steal this one: “syphallictic hot potato”….lololol.

Also, I’m not so sure any of the wives will *actually* leave (even if they really want to), and here’s why: I did a TON of reading on the FLDS lifestyle a few years ago and the women who actually made it out (Warren Jeffs’ lifestyle, I should clarify). There are some kick-ass nonfiction books out there written by survivors, and I’ve read quite a few.

So…these modern/non abusive FLDS folks actually, truly, wholeheartedly BELIEVE that by living plural marriage they will have an afterlife, ie eternity, with their husband as their king/lover and their own “planet” or some such while being permanently in a state of love and happiness forever and ever, amen.

There is so much I’ve actually forgotten, but you guys get the point. I’m not a “faith” person…I simply can not, in my scientific and deeply practical brain, believe in something based purely on *faith*. I need you to SHOW me, lol. Hell, even karma you can essentially watch happen! But anyway, I’m babbling. The Browns are SO, SO scared and freaked out about their kids that choose monogamy because they actually believe that child will miss out on this “incredible eternity”.

Have you watched Kody? He’s a goddamn NUTcase when he thinks he may have failed to lead the kids in the “right” direction as the leader (heh heh) of the household. The wives get a bit freaky about it, too, but thankholyshit they’re decent people and won’t force their beliefs on their kids (although they WILL write said beliefs in black Sharpie all over poor Logan’s college quilt!).

Well hell. I’m sorry. If anyone actually made it to the bottom of this giant comment …thanks lol. I shall step off my soapbox now.

Team Christine / Anti-team Robyn (hate) <<<<<though I LOVE what you did there @Chicken Lips!!

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Chicken Lips
Posted January 7, 2013 at 8:16 pm

@Amy – I don’t know that they are going to leave, leave, but they will definitely distance themselves from the circus. Maybe I’m wrong (it has happened once before). I think they do believe in the principle, but I think they are a little disappointed because this circus isn’t what they thought it would be.

You are so right about them being batcrap crazy about their children not living the principle later – even though they always say that they want their kids to do what their own calling is, but when the kids say “Yeah, it isn’t for me” we get meltdown – Christine gets upset, Janelle looks a little tense, Meri is happy because her kid is all about the principle and Robyn (hate) cries because the camera hasn’t been on her in the last 23 seconds.

I just got their book from the library. Have anyone here read it? I want real answers but I’m afraid it will be another “Secrets Revealed!” type thing. I’d better learn something new dangit because I went all the way to the library to get it!

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AmyOops
Posted January 8, 2013 at 2:34 pm

Oh damn! I forgot they evn HAD a book. Normally I’d be on that like a fly on shit but things have been crazy these last many months…sigh.

“…but when the kids say “Yeah, it isn’t for me” we get meltdown –Christine gets upset, Janelle looks a little tense, Meri is happy because her kid is all about the principle and Robyn (hate) cries because the camera hasn’t been on her in the last 23 seconds.”

Is it acceptable to nominate a remark for Commentgasm at year’s end already lol? Not only is the above quote funny, but it is also rather insightful

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Jazzy
Posted January 8, 2013 at 4:41 pm

Will this comment show up?

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Jazzy
Posted January 8, 2013 at 4:53 pm

Hooray! It did! My comments have just been disappearing.

I think Meri deserves more b/c she’s the first wife. She would never admit that, but I think it’s true. The first wife deserves French doors, NOT a crappy slider! And she needs to decide on the baby thing. Douchebag does deserve an answer. She’s just annoying this season.

These women should admit that they aren’t living plural marriage – they’re just four gals living separately and fighting over the same guy. I want to see a show on those Dargers – it would be interesting to see the differences.

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Posted January 8, 2013 at 5:18 pm

@nelliebelle That’s what I was thinking. Whatever their abilities are they’re totally not getting according to their need. Meri doesn’t need any of those upgrade options. But Janelle does need blinds. And if any of them needs a wet bar “for the extra counter space to put pastries on” it’s the 1s that’ve got a mess of little kids running around eating all the time.

Which is also how come Janelle actually needs concrete on the patio. Because even Kodoofus can tell without it the rugs are just going to get ruined. From all those kids coming in and out. And it’s their ways to walk around the house with their nasty shoes on. So they don’t even know about having a little area inside the door to take them off.

Since Meri’s going to be in the house by herself even if she just had 3 bedrooms she could make that into a hobby room.

It’s 1 thing to say provide for them all equally. But he could do that and still hang on to common sense. No matter what he thinks about what ism or other.

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captain-save-uh-hoe
Posted January 8, 2013 at 5:52 pm

My comment disappeared. GAAAH. In short… @amyoops- we should compare the books we’ve read, I read tons of those nonfiction survivor stories! Glad I’m not the only one who found those fascinating!

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Chicken Lips
Posted January 8, 2013 at 9:09 pm

Sigh – I was in the middle of typing up what I read in the book about how everyone met and the weddings…and then my computer went beserk and it all went bye bye. Maybe tomorrow I’ll try again, but I was doing it in response to @Sweetblondie – Meri and Janelle were seemingly friends before she joined the family (Janelle had been married to Meri’s brother and Meri’s family got Janelle in the divorce). It is possible that the “friendship” before the wedding was sugar coated though. I’ve only gotten through the first part.

I think that Kody married Christine because she was nice and fun and different from Meri and Janelle – but he admitted he wasn’t attracted to her – he thought she was a chunky monkey and he was a bit appalled at the way she could scarf chili cheese nachos. I don’t think it was love so much as he wanted someone to do silly things with that wasn’t too shy and reserved (Meri) or too practical and reasonable (Janelle).

46. 46
Jazzy
Posted January 9, 2013 at 4:53 am

I meant to say that I think that MERI THINKS that she deserves more b/c she’s Wifey #1. I think she wants her home to be the best one and to be the official family home for gatherings, etc.

Hey I want in on the book discussion! I read Escape and the follow up book by Carolyn Jessup. I love memoirs and anything about religious groups, since different religions fascinate me. Did you guys ever read, Under The Banner of Heaven by Krakauer? Incredible

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captain-save-uh-hoe
Posted January 9, 2013 at 9:32 am

Jazzy– I am right there with you!! i ready ESCAPE and loved it! Also read Under the Banner of Heaven- fascinating. I actually want to read it again because there’s just so much information in it. Another one you might want to check out: Stolen Innocence by Alyssa Wall … I’ll look and the see if I can recall any other books!

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Jazzy
Posted January 9, 2013 at 7:19 pm

Thanks Captain – I’ll check that one out! I love getting book recommendations. I’m more into reading non-fiction than fiction lately. I think people’s real lives are fascinating.

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captain-save-uh-hoe
Posted January 10, 2013 at 10:31 am

@Jazzy — I agree! I can’t get enough of them! I read a ton of books on the Amanda Knox case which made me so outraged about the injustices done that I had to take a break, but now I’m looking forward to her book out in April. Another one I just read- Desperado’s Wife. This one is probably right up your ally, the author writes about falling in love with someone in prison, and their marriage, etc. You’ll have to get past the typos… I think since it just came out, clearly they didn’t care to have a good editor. So brace yourself for numerous typos (I already emailed the author about 20 of them!), but if you can get past that, the story itself is a really interesting one.

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AmyOops
Posted January 10, 2013 at 6:00 pm

@captain: Those type of books DO rock, don’t they? Even if they were fiction they would be good reads…but the shit actually *happened*!

Quick question for whomever would like to answer: James Frey and the Oprah/made-some-stuff-up-in-the-book fiasco…I was TOTES not upset. It was a damn fine book. It was well composed, “colorful”, and even quite a bit of an eye opener. I was stunned people wanted a refund. What do you guys think?

Ooh books! Of course I can only recall the ones still on Kindle, but here are a few…

Escape/Jessop and Palmer

Quiverfull/Joyce

Stolen Innocence/Wall

Favorite Wife – Escape from Polygamy/Schmidt

Shattered Dreams/Spencer

Holy shit I guess I have more than a few lol. I’ve always been fascinated with polygamy, patriarchy [E-VIL!], and Quiverfull (think Duggars – hate!).

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AmyOops
Posted January 10, 2013 at 6:02 pm

Oops I think there were more but I’m done typing on this damn tablet

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captain-save-uh-hoe
Posted January 11, 2013 at 10:37 am

Shall we start a book club? Haha! I think I’ll check out Shattered Dreams!

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Mimo
Posted January 11, 2013 at 10:54 am

@AmyOops – the Frey book was a good read. I didn’t ask for a refund, however; my “friend”, is veddy veddy smart and she would not deign to read fiction, and that’s what it ended up being. I don’t know if she had actually read it or not, but I do remember her muttering something about wanting her money back.

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Jazzy
Posted January 11, 2013 at 11:12 am

@captain – I’ll check those books out. Yes the Amanda Knox made me crazy too – I can’t believe the American gov’t didn’t step in and do something. Italy just fabricated things to keep her in jail! I’ll be reading her book too. I’m in for the book group! Let’s read all the polygamy books we can find!!

@Amy – I didn’t read that book, but if a book is “non-fiction” then it should be accurate. If not, he should have fictionalized his life story and sold it as fiction.

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AmyOops
Posted January 11, 2013 at 12:11 pm

Yay book club! Bookgasm? We could be the “Bookgasmii”?

@Mimo: Ah, yes. I think we all know one or two of that sort lol.

@Jazzy: Obviously he shouldn’t have sold it as nonfiction…I guess I have a hard time understanding why people would want their money back, though. It was an excellent read. In my head I simply shifted that *file* from the “nonfiction” compartment to the “fiction” and BAM! Done. Buuut I know everyone perceives things differently, so I get it