Survivor Recap: Bite Nite

28 Comments

1. 1
   Stacey
   Posted December 14, 2012 at 10:13 pm

   I am thrilled Scabby is gone. What. A. Bitch! I wouldn’t be surprised to learn she found a poison spider and put it on Denise’s neck. I think Lisa is gonna take the whole thing. Can’t wait for Sunday!!

2. 2
   andyourlittledogtoo
   Posted December 14, 2012 at 11:05 pm

   You know, for his age (for any age really) Skupin has a pretty nice bod. That picture of him at the ring toss was quite a nice view. And I never thought I say that about Skupin.

   I am so over Lisa. That whole ‘I am too pure for this game but I have to buck up and play sneaky and lie even though my heart is hurt about it’ deal drives me insane. It’s a game. Deal with it and stop whining about how you are just soooooo sorry your poor pure soul is grieved at having to play it smartly to win it. Ugh.

   Glad Scabby is out of there. Bad show for making me sweat whether the others would take her to the final or not. I could not have bourne that. Too bad the folks at Ponderosa didn’t have to spend more down time with her though, that would have been fun to watch actually.

   I don’t want Lisa to win on general principles, one of which I mentioned above. But Malcolm, Denise, or Skupin all deserve to win IMO and I’d be happy with any of them although I am kind of rooting for Malcolm because… I’m not sure why I like him best because Denise is amazing and Skupin has my heart. Huh.

   Thanks for posting the recap quickly – can’t wait until Sunday!

3. 3
   PinkTop
   Posted December 15, 2012 at 12:36 am

   As fun as it would be to see Scabby questioned by the jury (that would have been a Lack of Self-Awareness Olympics championship run to end all), I am glad she is finally gone. Didn’t deserve to make it that far. We can now look forward to her interrogation of the finalists, sure to be a doozy.

4. 4
   itchy
   Posted December 15, 2012 at 1:11 am

   I feel good for Skupin that he got to come back and play Survivor again, since the last time he got screwed by his own goofiness. And he’s the ONLY returnee I could say I’m happy to see again (other than Parvati, of course, but that goes without saying, right?). And kudos for him for making it this far. Except that it’s clear now he’s a plant from Burnett to promote his wacky fundamentalism. Just as Lisa is.

   Also, I think Skupin and Lisa have been fucking. Does the camera really follow them everywhere?

   And if I was in pain with a mysterious bite that may be venomous and about to kill me and a pack of ravenous bible-thumpers tried to lay hands on me, I’d grab a machete and hack their hands right off. Denise is a lot stronger than I am, that’s for sure. Kudoes to Malcolm for steering clear of this latest display of religidiocy.

   It bothers me that they’re not showing any of the strategizing between Malcolm and Denise — because you know they’re working hard at it. Malcolm’s final three ‘deal’ with the Bible Twins was just a ploy to throw them off scent. I hope.

   I also think Denise gets too befuddled at tribal council. What she could easily have pointed out was that Scabby got lucky to be on Tandang — since they let her sit out of nearly every single competition. And that’s why Scabby was lucky and never had to go to Tc. Maybe she did say it but they cut it out of the editing?

   But damn, that Lisa is a pitbull. She pretty near bit Denise’s head off for that one. I’m surprised she didn’t whip out the hot sauce right then and there. I’m convinced she’s one evil bitch.

5. 5
   Derek Hazelton
   Posted December 15, 2012 at 1:44 am

   Oh lord, Itchy, and here I thought you would actually call Denise a hypocrite for participating in a prayer circle after her bite after she spent weeks complaining and spreading her brand of condescension to anyone who dared to pray during the game since “God doesn’t care about Survivor.”

   And, Lisa is crafty. What she did on Wednesday night, with Denise blowing it immensely during the TC, was simple jury management. She massaged the Tandang egos in an effort to garner votes and while it might not work, it was smarter to do than downplaying the team’s achievements like Denise did.

   If you look at the Ponderosa clips, you do see that Abi really learned from her experience and owned being a bitch in the game. So, I give her a lot of credit for playing the “bitch/villain” card, but was actually cool about owning it and you realize how bitter RC is about being at the bottom of an alliance.

6. 6
   itchy
   Posted December 15, 2012 at 3:22 am

   Ha, Derek, I’m pretty sure she only said that one time. And she never said she was an atheist. And let’s put it like this: Do YOU believe any god would care about Survivor?

   But the impression I got from that scene was that Denise was suffering in horrible pain and was too weak to fight back against the scavenging horde of bible thumpers who overwhelmed her with their ridiculous.

   It’s similar to my recurring nightmare where I’m lying on my deathbed, too weak to speak or move, and some evil priest comes along and starts mumbo-jumboing over me.

   Or those mormons ‘baptizing’ Holocaust victims.

   But I agree, I think at a certain point Scabby understood her best hope of making it to the end was by playing the villain. But she took it way too far and end up making it preferable to the others just to get rid of her. I wonder if this last TC might have gone differently if she hadn’t called Skupin an idiot and a moron?

7. 7
   Catherine
   Posted December 15, 2012 at 6:42 am

   I’ve been team Denise/ Malcolm since very early in the game, but he kinda pissed me off when he didnt give her the idol. I think that it’s for once going to be super close, and probably cone down to the jury questions. It’s anybody’s game. But I do think Malcolm and Denise may have an edge.

8. 8
   BellicoseBaby
   Posted December 15, 2012 at 9:14 am

   I think Lisa comes off as very earnest. Her conflict seems to come from feeling bad about hurting people’s feelings, which are the consequences of playing the game (lying, being disingenious, etc). She seems compassionate, not righteous, in my estimation.

   I also don’t think Scabbs played the bitch card; I don’t think she’s smart enough to have any real cards to play. At Ponderosa she was contrite with RC once she was expressly told that RC had not betrayed the secret of the Immunity Idol. It seemed to me everyone kind of flees her presence except for that clip of sweet, simple Carter telling her to give RC some time, and that he thinks she’s cool (or something like that).

   RC, while appearing to lack self-awareness, is alert to the cameras, and looks to be angling for more air-time at the Reunion.

   And Jeff Kent -what a curmudgeonly, vacuous, prick.

   This is certainly the most likeable final four. Any ideas of how the votes will go for whoever ends up in the million dollar final?

9. 9
   crankyguy
   Posted December 15, 2012 at 9:16 am

   But the impression I got from that scene was that Denise was suffering in horrible pain and was too weak to fight back against the scavenging horde of bible thumpers who overwhelmed her with their ridiculous.

   But, but, but, itchy! It totally worked. If they had not prayed, she would have to have been medivaced out of there. It’s a miracle. And I’m pretty sure Denise is a atheist since she seemed pretty disgusted that time about the praying and because I can’t imagine there being any such thing as a Christian sex therapist. Christian rock music is bad enough, but Christian sex therapy? Nobody prayed over Scoopin’ way back when he fell in the fire, and look what happened to him.

10. 10
    hot cawfee
    Posted December 15, 2012 at 10:05 am

    Ding Dong the BITCH is Gone!!!!!!!— Whew!!!!!! I was worried that Denise would get voted out. Doubly so b/c Mal didnt give her the HII. hhmmmm–maybe that was a double middle finger then to Scabby–that Denise didnt need to play one (a real HII not the vapor idol that Scabby believes exists). And speaking of middle fingers-bravo Penner–I laughed.

    I am a Denise fan and would love to see her at final 2. She is a strong player and hasn’t won immunity and still remains there. Good work. I have a scary feeling that Lisa could take this—maybe she will fold under jury scruitny.

    Can some one please tell me what is up with Lisa’s eyebrows??? Its like her brows are….well……underlined.
    If Scabby has a blackeye or a cast or something next time we see the jury I will laugh, fall over and laugh more.

11. 11
    zerocool
    Posted December 15, 2012 at 11:21 am

    re: Lisa’s eyebrows – they were plucked and are now growing in, badly.

12. 12
    Stacey
    Posted December 15, 2012 at 11:28 am

    LOL @Hot Cawfee, I think the underline is Lisa’s thick eyebrows growing back in! And while I think Lisa will win I have been rooting for Denise since the beginning.

13. 13
    AmyOops
    Posted December 15, 2012 at 2:46 pm

    I totally agree with every damn thing andyourlittledogtoo said, especially the part about Lisa. I dont care how sweet and meek and “God Fearing” [ugh!] she pretends to be, she is cold and calculating.

    The question that’s been on my mind since the beginning is would Skupin “out” Lisa if they were in the final three together…part of me thinks it’d be a decent move, but then the jury might think, “Oh, he betrayed a confidence!”. What do you guys think?

    Team Malcolm/Denise/Skupin! Oh, and thanks for the Edward photo, PottyMouth!

14. 14
    itchy
    Posted December 15, 2012 at 2:55 pm

    Surely Penner or someone on the crew has already done the big reveal about Lisa?

15. 15
    lindaw205
    Posted December 15, 2012 at 3:30 pm

    I’m hoping that Denise takes it all. I’ve liked her since the beginning and I think she’ll turn on Malcolm because he essentially told her he would turn on her by not playing that idol. I’m guessing he wanted a souvenir but I think he made a big mistake by not playing it for her. It would have been good strategy to show loyalty to her even if he was sure she was safe.

    Like I said, I hope Denise wins but I’m okay with anyone except Lisa.

    And Abi probably did find a spider and put it on her neck. Bwahahaha!

16. 16
    Samanda
    Posted December 15, 2012 at 3:57 pm

    Cranky – http://www.christiansextherapy.com/
    A whole site dedicated to christian sex therapy, and it’s not the only one. Appearantly christian sex therapists are not uncommon. There is a big difference between not believing God interfers in Survivor, and being an athiest. Although there is some overlap. I know plenty of christians that roll their eyes at athletes that pray for their team to win, etc. Also you could be diest, pantheist, pagan, hindu, buddhist, or… anything shy of a fundie really. I have no idea what Denise’s religious beliefs are, (because unlike some, she keeps them to herself) but I also could hardly care less. She seems tolerant of the others religion, even if she is not too inclined to particapate herself. Her one comment at the beginning of the game seems to be blown out of proportion by some.

17. 17
    crankyguy
    Posted December 15, 2012 at 4:49 pm

    A Christian sex therapist would not say, “I’m a sex therapist,” but rather, “I’m a Christian S – E – X therapist.” It’s the Christian sex therapists who attempt to cure homosexuality and will pray with clients to help them fight unholy urges like wanting to copulate with the lights on.

    So, my point is that Denise cannot be a Christian and a sex therapist, but she could be a Christian and a Christian sex therapist, which is totally different, but she is not a Christian sex therapist because she is a sex therapist. See?

18. 18
    Robin
    Posted December 15, 2012 at 5:21 pm

    Just wondering, Is Christian sex and Missionary sex the same thing? Cuz if it is, I am not interested unless I am tired.

19. 19
    Derek Hazelton
    Posted December 15, 2012 at 7:35 pm

    @Samanda, there was no point in this game where Denise was open-minded about the outward expression of religion. Her voting out of Roxanne was partially due to her religiosity and her participating in the prayer circle this episode, whether because she was in a weakened state or not, is hypocritical bullshit. She clearly hates religious people and I wonder how this season would’ve played out differently had Lisa not snooped and found Malcolm’s idol. As you all know, I can’t stand Denise and her recent tirade against Abi made her more sympathetic in my eyes. If Denise were a good player in this game, she would have tried to bring Abi over as a swing vote for her/Malcolm, considering Abi wouldn’t have won against either twosome. Denise’s hubris caused her to destroy any goodwill she had on the jury when she talked shit on original Tandang. I was so glad Lisa shut that down and basically told her that the only reason Denise has a storyline to speak of this season is because her tribe was Pagonged.

    Team Anyone but Denise.

20. 20
    Robin
    Posted December 15, 2012 at 7:50 pm

    I think Denise can kick Lisa’s ass in a challenge every single day of the week.

    That’s why I think Lisa will be the first to go.

21. 21
    PinkTop
    Posted December 16, 2012 at 12:40 am

    I wouldn’t even be offended if Skupin won. Skupin, despite his thumping and general simplicity, seems like a decent human being who knows how to have fun and get along with others. I could probably hang out with Skupin and have a nice time, as long as he didn’t try to convert me or save my soul. I get the impression that he usually keeps his thumping private unless special occasion calls, such as saving a friend from a vicious vampire attack.

22. 22
    nashuaf
    Posted December 16, 2012 at 1:00 am

    Am I the only one who noticed Malcolm after the reward challenge pointing at himself when Skupin was asked to pick someone to take with him?

23. 23
    itchy
    Posted December 16, 2012 at 1:29 am

    Oh come on now. Do you sincerely believe Denise “hates” religious people? Even I don’t hate religious people. And my views on religion are pretty well known around here. Sure, religious types make me scratch me head in perpetual wonder. And I hate what religions have done to the world. But hate the people who’ve been duped into believing this crap? No. Well, other than Pat Robertson. No. And Denise is a lot more open-minded than I am.

    I suppose we could play the what-if game on all the conestants. Abi for example — what if she hadn’t freaked out about RC and alienated her from the rest of her tribe? That was a huge mistake on Abi’s part. And especially on Pete’s part –what a complete idiot he was. Turning Abi against RC doomed his entire game.

    Also, as I suggested, Denise was only trying to point out that Scabby was lucky to be in the Tandang tribe, not that Tandang itself was lucky — I’m sure Denise explained that but they left that out on the editing floor in order to make Lisa look a bit sharper than she actually is.

    Just as they left out the fact that Lisa, Skupin and Malcolm never had any intention of voting out Denise and that little snippet on the boat was a total red herring to keep the show mildly interesting.

    Oh, Pinktop — methinks Skupin is all about converting people and trying to save their souls in real life. He gives off that creepy proselytizer vibe. Lisp and all.

24. 24
    PinkTop
    Posted December 16, 2012 at 9:30 am

    itchy – lol @ lisp. Who knows. I was going to ignore it, but … re: Skupin & Lisa ****ing – Shame on you for putting that out there! After that unwelcome image, I feel like I need a shower more than they do.

25. 25
    Mister_Dangerous
    Posted December 16, 2012 at 11:25 am

    Oh, I was SO happy to see Scabby go. Just thinking about how hurt and defeated she must have felt made me feel GIDDY!

    RE: Lisa. I remember watching her on the FACTS OF LIFE so I have residual good-will toward her. It’s hard for me to separate her from her character of Blair. Just as I think of Gloria Swanson as Norma Desmond. Sally Field as Gidget and Michael Keaton as Batman. I don’t see her as evil or fake but rather as Jo’s best friend.

    I will be fine with any of the four as the winner.

26. 26
    Mister_Dangerous
    Posted December 16, 2012 at 3:17 pm

    3 things:

    I was just reading one of my gay SURVIVOR recaps and that guy:

    1) had a picture of the final five all cleaned up from the Jeff Probst show?
    2) said he thought Malcolm was trying to throw the reward challenge and that’s why he “fell” off and had to start again. The reasoning; somebody else would win and he wouldn’t have Denise asking for his extra immunity idol.
    3) said Abi is one of those people who only says good things about herself and bad things about others. She’s the type of person who starts wars.

27. 27
    ChaCha
    Posted December 16, 2012 at 5:02 pm

    After watching Scabi and RC interact at the Ponderosa, I’ve gotta say that those two deserve each other. And if I had to choose between the two, I hate to say it, but I’d side with Scabi simply because she doesn’t have the annoying bray of a laugh that RC is compelled to use after every sentence she says. That woman isn’t anywhere near as funny as she seems to think she is. Not to mention that her ability to hold a grudge is terrifying!

    I hope Skupin wins. People who might hold it against him that he’s a returning player seem to be forgetting that he never got to finish the game the first time after he burned up his hands in the campfire. It’s not like he got voted out by the tribe.

28. 28
    Derek Hazelton
    Posted December 16, 2012 at 5:10 pm

    @Mister_Dangerous, on what site do you read gay Survivor recaps?