Survivor Recap: Dr. PoopyPantyHead

Sabrina knows that the vote tonight is going to be a big one and is really hoping that Kim was able to convince Abitchia that Poopy was the one that needs to go. 

Before they leave, PoopyPants takes a walk with Abitchia and says he’s getting a feeling that she’s not going to take him to the final three.  SO NOT TRUE!  Abitchia tells him.  She says the plan is to vote out Chelsea tonight.  He hopes to god that the girls don’t boot him outta there tonight.

They get ready to go to tribal and PoopyPants decides it’s time for a little wardrobe change.

This isn’t offensive to anyone here, is it?

I don’t think they find it offensive so much as nasty.  Why the hell would ANYONE want to put a dirty pair of ladies’ bikini bottoms on their head?

To make your hair smell better, of course!

Time for tribal.

Jeff brings the jury in and HOLY SHIT they look like they might be the bitterest jury EVER.  Well, I guess EVER is a mighty strong word, but somehow I think we’re going to be hearing a lot about how all the finalists suck in the final tribal council.

Jeff starts out by asking Sabrina if she’s surprised to still be there.  Nope.  She thinks if you don’t put yourself in the mix then you’ve already defeated yourself from the start.  Dos she still believe she can win?  Yup.  This earns her a dirty look form Kat.

Jeff asks PoopyPantyHead why he thinks he’s still there when all the others guys are sitting on the jury.  Because he helped the ladies get rid of the guys.  Now he’s the one getting dirty looks.  From the guys.  He acknowledges that his time is probably just about over, but if someone wants to take him to the end, he’ll go!  He thinks it’s obvious that the jury isn’t going to vote for a millionaire.

Let me get this straight….1) you’re a millionaire.  2) you smell like poop.  3) you can’t afford to get your shocks replaced.  4) you’re a millionaire????

Sabrina points out that whatever PoopyPantyHead has to say about his chances of winning, the fact is that he is a guy, and some of the other guys may vote for him just because they don’t want a woman to win.  She thinks it’s a risk to take him to the top. 

PoopyPantyHead thinks his game is pretty sold right now; the ladies have kept to their word thus far and almost invariable the right person goes home every time.

Looks like the jury is in COMPLETE agreement with THAT statement!

He knows the jury won’t agree because it’s human nature that they wouldn’t be introspective enough to know that they weren’t in alignment when the game was afoot.  But they thought they were, Jeff points out.  True, true.

Jeff wonders if Poopy often feels misunderstood in this game.  He sure does.  For example, he wore something today and the girls were all worried about microbes but he knows all there is to know about microbes!!! 

What the fuck are you talking about????

Abitchia says he’s wearing Kat’s tank top, and then Poopy spills the beans about his panty-hat wearing episode back at camp.

Ewwwwww

Poor Kat looks like she is going to cry and I have to say, I do feel a little sorry for her here.  I mean, I know I’D be grossed out and upset if PoopyPantyHead put my panties on his head!  They’ll never be clean enough to wear again!

Jeff skips from PantyHats to the reward challenge, asking Abitchia what she thought of Chelsea’s picks.  We all know where this is going.  She bitches about the choice of Kim and Christina throws out there that Chelsea had told her that she would take her.  Chelsea points out that she was a big blabber mouth and so she felt like that voided their agreement. 

Next time, keep yer piehole shut and you might get to go!